19.1 Kal And Lou (1)
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That day at Lasortio, even for a moment, Karloi couldn't decide whether he should think it was a good thing that he had seen Lilian, or whether he should regret it. It was good to see Lilian getting better. And he also thought it was a good thing Lilian didn't see him.
However, the face he had seen for a while got stuck like a thorn and tormented him. The desire to see her more properly and closer shook him relentlessly. In between these gaps, Karloi grew so thin, like an artificial flower, like a colorful Rituna without fragrance.
The ignorant people thought that he was becoming more and more impeccable, but in reality, his kernel was already dead.
He has the obsession to live, the instinct to want to end it by dying, and the longing to see Lilian while having a reason not to see her. In the midst of this, he spent each day, and when he felt he's going crazy, he thought of Lilian's smile. Lilian is fine now, so he remembered that he must live too.
Nothing could erase the regrets about why it couldn't be him that could make Lilian laugh... The thought that this kind of life would go on without end was just far-fetched.
Karloi struggled to erase his thoughts. He tried to force Lilian, who controlled everything in him, out of his mind, and focused on Alexis in front of him.
"They must have acquired a new land, and it seems like they want to sell the conquered land to us, but there is no need to buy it. Aside from being suspicious of its quality, Mach looks too impatient."
"The conquest war is more expensive than I thought, but I don't think it's a good idea. So you're saying you won't take it at all?"
"Those are not necessary for Croysen. After all, isn't it an exotic luxury? I think Mach is just bored, but I'd better turn its attention to Bernie. I'm sure you'll find a way to negotiate."
"I was going to tell you otherwise... I don't think it's going to be easy for me to go to Mach."
Karloi raised his head for the first time in response to the reply. Mach kept asking for him to visit, so he was going to send Alexis instead, but suddenly he knew what this meant.
"Why can't you go?"
"It's hard because I'm old."
For some reason, he felt like she was just returning what he had said. Karloi frowned.
"Are you telling me to accept that?"
"It's the truth. It's too far to go to Mach. Aren't you supposed to get on a boat?"
"If it's not you, then..."
"Your Majesty must go. This time, the theme of the meeting has changed a bit, so it would be better for Your Majesty to go and see it in person."
Karloi's haggard face looked more tired. Karloi didn't like Mach. Alexis felt sorry for a moment, but then changed her mind. After all, Karloi didn't really like anything in the world. It wasn't new at all.
She thought about whether it would be better to say honestly that Lilian is in Mach, but she also thought it would be better not to. She would only get tired of him saying he didn't deserve to go.
Karloi just knew that Lilian was now staying at the private residence of the Viscountess in the countryside of Sorta. He didn't even ask exactly where. He only told them to give moderate help and let him know only when something happens.
Alexis realized that Karloi should rather not know. Is it because she thinks he will visit the Empress without realizing it?
"Please go there at least once."
Alexis insisted, feeling a bit skeptical as to why she was even doing this. Still, she thought this crazy guy would get better if he saw her face. It's not even a big reunion.
Although the physician is pouring all kinds of medicine into Karloi, Alexis sees it as just a material that makes Karloi's body move, nothing more, nothing less. Becoming a drug addict. She even heard from the physician that he had been drinking every night while calling the Empress' name.
Day by day, the new physician was shocked by Karloi's condition. He was always learning new things about how mentally ill a person can be, and how desperately a crazy person can hide his condition.
If that was to be called growth, yes, it would be growth of its own. After going through Karloi, it will be easier for him to treat any patient. Alexis quietly clicked her tongue without Karloi's knowledge.
...Alright. It would be better to go once. If I go this time, it will be quiet for about five years."
Karloi finally nodded his head with a grumpy look.
"Take Asher with you."
"Asher can go to Bernie, but not to Mach. The Duchess can have him."
Asher, who flies around the world, doesn't want to go to Mach, even if he dies. It was because he remembered the terrible days of slavery.
"He seems to be following the Duchess well anyway."
Even so, whenever she saw Asher, she always thought that she should teach him the proper language, and thanks to Karloi, Alexis was spending a lot of time with Asher.
"Well, I don't know if he'd rather go to Mach than stay with me... But I got it for now."
Alexis glanced back as she left the office. Karloi, who was sitting alone at his desk, looked lonely. As always. He's always been that way since he was very young.
Suddenly, she remembered the Empress standing on the shores of Lake Mexus and asking about Karloi's well-being. It seemed as if she was going to be blown away by the light wind. That is what Karloi exactly looks like now.
Come to think of it, she should have arrived at Mach by now and had more than enough time to meet Keana Roden. Alexis wondered if a woman, who seemed to be able to resist even the wind, would be able to withstand Mach.
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Lilian had never been on a ship in all her life. No, she had never even seen the sea properly. So she didn't even know, does she have such severe seasickness?
The sea was beautiful for the first ten minutes. Then Lilian, who had been admiring the deep blue color that made her eyes shiver as the sea breeze of different scents and strength hit her face, fell from motion sickness for a moment.
She thought of Denise as she fiddled with her necklace in her breathless mood, but within a few minutes, she held it tight, fearing that she would lose her necklace.
"Are you all right?"
At Mary Ann's question, Lilian managed to nod.
"Hold on for a moment. We're almost there."
"Usually, with sedative treatment, you'll get better from motion sickness. But it seems like Your Majesty has a particularly severe constitution."
Amos Light, a physician who followed her to Mach, said embarrassingly. Lilian said she couldn't take a sane head from the Empire to Mach, but he said that it was Karloi's only request through her Alexis.
The physician seemed to have no complaints about coming to Mach. He said that there was something he wanted to study in Mach. And he added meaningfully that he doesn't think Her Majesty will stay at Mach for a long time anyway.
"Even if I was no longer the Empress."
Lilian murmured in a low voice.
"But you don't have a specific title for wealth... And it hasn't been officially accepted yet, has it? Until then, just do it, Your Majesty."
Alexis said it would take some time to deal with it without noise. She went to Lasortio to recuperate, but her body did not get better and she decided to step down on her own.
Lilian was at a loss for a moment, thinking about what life would be like. But the seasickness caused by strong waves cleared her mind. She doesn't know if she should be grateful. Mary Ann quietly patted the back of the nauseating Lilian.
"We're almost there! Come out. It's amazing."
Jane, who was out on the deck, came in and raised her volume with a slightly excited face.
"How will we get out? Her Majesty is having such a hard time just by sitting still..."
"It's okay. I can go out for a while. And really, how should you address me? If you call me that once we're in Mach, it will only attract attention."
"But Your Majesty's appearance looks... Like the typical Croysen people. Then I'll call you 'Miss'."
"It would be better to pretend to be married than to be single. Just call me 'Madam'."
Lilian managed to get herself up and head out to the deck. As soon as she stood up holding the railing, she could see what Jane called her for.
The port city of Kirok, called the entrance to Mach, was visible. And a wolf made of water droplets was running around in the air above the sea surrounding Kirok. Wolves and water don't go together at all, but it was just such an amazing sight.
"Amazing, isn't it? I've only heard of Mach's sea magic, it's the first time I've seen it like this."
Mary Ann whispered with admiration.
As the ship approached Kirok, small decorations made of water could be seen. Drops of water that jump like a fountain in the middle of the sea, or things like water columns that rise up. As if to show that he was the ruler of the sea, Mach was glamorous from the entrance. But there was one more intense thing.
"Wow."
It was the smell of the sea.
"Oh, my. Madam, are you okay?"
Lilian nodded. She had a hunch that she would never forget first impression of Mach. Suddenly, she wondered if Denise would have been as seasick as she was if she had been on a ship. She was still heartbroken by the curiosity that could not be answered forever.
But it was okay. She felt like she could say it was okay. If she keeps wondering, time will go by. Then if she met Denise, she would then be able to ask her all at once.
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LEGENDS:
text - Narration
"text" - Conversation
(text) - Thoughts
text - Flashback
"text" - Past Conversation
**text - SFX
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