A/N: More of a filler chapter, but still explains quite a bit to lead up to the other chapters. I was struggling to write this story because i had an idea how i wanted it to go in my head, i just didnt know what order i wanted it to go in :L but i made a map of the events that are going to happen in it and now my head feels like its not going to explode in confusion, which means chapters written a little faster hopefully! yay! :L

Thank you for reading and enjoy my dear followers :D

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I almost ripped his t-shirt off him in a frantic attempt to get rid of the clothing barrier between us.

Jace’s lips slammed onto mine again hungrily, and we both knew that in about 5 minutes we would have these clothes off of us and tap into that sexual attraction that we held 3 years ago, and still hold now.

Then, he had to ruin it.

“I knew the old you was in there somewhere Faith.” He mumbled against my lips, which caused me to snap out of whatever trance I was in and pull away like he was on fire.

His brows creased together at the distance I had just put between us looking at me quizzically as to why the hell I just stopped.

Okay, I know what he said wasn’t offensive or in many people’s eyes worth stopping what we were just about to do (which even I admit would have been great. It always was with Jace) but it was enough to make me want to turn around and bolt out the door.

I didn’t want to be the old Faith. Why the hell would I want to be her?

She was weak and pathetic. Which was exactly what I was being right now as I gave into Jace so easily. Weak.

Even though I told myself this, I knew the real reason I didn’t want to be the old Faith was because I could never have the life the old Faith had. Why would I want to be like the old Faith when I couldn’t have my friends and family around me like she did? I couldn’t live a normal life like she did, so I had to be a new person. Distancing myself from the life I could never have again, and focusing on this hellhole of a life I lead now.

“Faith, why did you stop?” Jace questions, his breath still heavy from the excitement “No pressure or anything, but I could probably pitch a tent with the pole I’ve got going right now.”

I breathe a laugh at his delicate words, before shaking my head and telling myself to snap out of it.

“This can’t happen.” I state, more to myself than anything.

He clenches his jaw and he looks like a little boy whose just been told they can’t have a bike for Christmas “What? Yes it can, it can happen easily. It’s happened before, it can happen now.” He quickly spoke, his tone quite funny as he was almost pleading.

 Jesus, withhold sex from men and pride is something they no longer worry about losing...

I shook my head again “You have to get off me.”

He must have senses a weakness in my voice, because his lip twitches and he brings his face closer, determination in his eyes “You say you want me off, but your body is not matching your words Faith.”

I gulped slightly, trying not to let my freaking body let me down again. I didn’t want him to get off I’ll admit, but if we did this now it would prove his point that the old Faith was still in here somewhere. And I couldn’t let that happen. She died a long time ago.

“Jace, you seriously need to get off.” I repeat, my voice a little stronger than it was earlier. However, the words were still hard to choke out.

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