Would It Matter // Rick Grimes

Chapter 52

Ricks POV:

We were back at Alexandria and I walked straight to the house. Olivia was inside watching Emma and Judith. I walked past her and went to mine and Sydney's room and closed the door. I sat on bed and put my head in my hands. I began crying at the events that took place. Abraham and Glenn getting killed kept replaying in my mind. Negan taking Sydney with him.

"Dad?" Carl said.

I looked up at him and he saw the tears in my eyes and walked over. He sat down beside me and stayed silent for a minute before speaking.

"Mom will be okay. She's strong, you know that." He said.

"How do we know that? Who knows what he's doing to her. He took her away from her family. The same with Daryl." I said. "Killed Abraham and Glenn. She was very close to Glenn. He was like a brother to her." I said.

"Yes, we don't know but we have to believe in her. She knows what to do. She's smart, she won't do anything crazy that could get her or anyone else killed. We'll get through this dad. We always do." He said. "Glenn and Abraham is helping us fight through this because they're watching over all of us and they're helping us through." He said. "I miss mom too. Even if she's not my birth mother, she still treated me like she did give birth to me. She was always there for us and she still is. She's fighting this with us from there." He said.

"I know I just wish she was right here. With us. I don't like that she's with him." I said.

"I don't like it either but you know she'll do anything to be with us again." He said.

I didn't say anything just hugged him.

"Thank you Carl, you're a great son." I said.

"Anytime dad, you can talk to me about anything." He said.

Sydney's POV:

I was led to a room by Negan. He opened the door and I followed him inside.

"This is where you'll be sleeping darling." Negan said.

"Thank you." I said, with no emotion.

I was hiding what I'm feeling. I don't want to show him weakness. He could use that against me.

"I know you miss your husband but your safer here. It's a safer place for you to give birth to your baby. We got a doctor here to help with the delivery." He said.

"I much rather be in Alexandria with my family." I said, looking out the window.

"I know darling but you're not going back. You cannot leave this room unless I'm with you." He said.

"Why would I leave the room? I don't want to see anymore of you. Not after what you did to us. Not after you killed my friends. Who were like family to me. You killed Glenn in front of his wife. Killed Abraham in front of people who loved him. I can't forgive you for doing that. Not ever." I said, angry.

"You lost two people I've lost a lot more people to your group." He said.

"I lost more than two people during this whole apocalypse." I said.

"Like who?" He asked.

"I lost my parents. I lost both of my best friends. I lost my sister. I lost someone who was like a father to me. I lost a girl who was like a little sister to me. I lost someone I saw as my own son. I lost someone who was like a brother." I said. "So don't say I didn't lose enough people to know what it means to lose someone. I've lost too much. More than a human should have to go through." I said.

He didn't say anything just walked out of the room. I put my back against the wall and slid down to the floor, remembering everyone I lost. I put my head down and cried.

"I miss all of you. So much." I said, through tears.

It was dark now and I was just laying in bed, staring at the wall. I was wishing I was laying next to Rick. He always kept me calm just by laying next to me. But I have to stay strong if I want to see him again. If I want to see all of them again. I found myself beginning to fall asleep with the thought of everyone back home. My family.