*Y/N*
"Wanda?"
Wanda slowly makes her way into your room, keeping her eyes on the ground in front of her as she quietly shuts the door behind her.
"Wanda, what are you doing here? It's nearly midnight, aren't you usually asleep by now?"
The tower seems to lose life around 10pm each night, leaving you and Yelena usually as the last ones roaming the halls or still fully awake in your bedrooms alone.
Not receiving a response from Wanda after a few seconds you launch into the apology that you have been repeating and practicing in your head all day.
"I'm so sorry about today. I – I don't know why I pushed you that hard or said those things. I shouldn't have gotten on top of you like that, it wasn't the type of training we were meant to be doing. I don't know, I was just – I don't know why I did it. I don't know why I said anything about you being jealous either. I don't think you are actually jealous or have anything to be jealous about. I know you were just trying to get a reaction out of me... which clearly you did. I just –"
"Y/n." Wanda says quietly, with no hint of emotion in her voice. Her eyes have stayed on the ground the entire time you were rambling.
Fuck me. Is she here to finish me off or some shit? Honestly, I hope so at this point.
She finally raises her head so you can see her eyes. Her eyes are red, but not from her powers.
"Y/n, you shouldn't be the one apologizing. I lost control and threw you into a wall." She drops her gaze again before continuing. "I hurt you. I really hurt you. And here you are apologizing to me. I –" her breath catches as she tries to continue her train of thought. "-- I was pushing you and still you never once used your strength on me. You never punched me with your powers, but I used mine against you."
"It happens sometimes. I promise I can take it. I'm ok, really I am." Wanda doesn't believe you, and just shakes her head in response.
Scooting over on your bed to create space, you gesture to Wanda to come over to the bed. "Can you come here please?" She shakes her head.
"Y/n I'm being serious. Today wasn't good. I was – am a monster!" She retorts at your question, emotions getting the better of her.
"Wanda. Never would anything you do ever cause me to believe that you are a monster." The words fly out of your mouth so authentically and honestly that Wanda finally looks back up to you. "Now please, can you come here for a minute. I don't know if you know this but I 1v1'd a wall today and the wall definitely won." Giving Wanda a smile you pat the bed and she finally joins, sitting her legs criss-crossed next to you.
"Can you trust me?" You ask as you hold your hand palm side up in front of her.
Without words, she places her hand in yours. Taking her hand, you gently put it on your shoulder, never letting go of her. "As you saw, my shoulder was dislocated but I popped it back in place." Gently rubbing her hand over your shoulder you continue, "you can feel that it's back in place and healed up for the most part."
Continuing, lightly dragging her hand down your arm, you stop over the area where your bone was broken. "Earlier this was broken but if you gently squeeze, you can feel everything is connected again and nothing is broken."
You wait for a minute as you can feel how tense Wanda is. "Wanda, can you breathe for me please? I can feel you holding your breath. I promise I'm ok." She lets out an exhale and you can feel her relax a little more than she was before.
You bend your leg so your knee is to your chest and move the blanket off of your leg so Wanda can see your ankle. Moving her hand down your leg and to your ankle you let her hand hover over the bandages on your foot. "This is a little trickier to feel so you just need to believe me, but I also had a broken bone in my ankle. Like the rest of my body, it is also healed up. The only thing is I feel the pain from all the broken bones but they aren't broken anymore. But I can take the pain, it's ok."
Finally letting go of Wanda's hand you see her shut her eyes and bring her hands into her lap. "I promise I'm ok. I'm sorry I upset you."
"Stop saying you're sorry. You didn't do anything."
Unable to think of anything worthy as a response, you give a small defeated smile and stay silent.
"What about your concussion and your stomach?"
"Wh– What?" You made sure to not let anyone know that there were more to your injuries than you said out loud in the training room earlier.
"I can fee– I just know that you had more injuries than you said out loud. Is your head and your stomach ok?"
"Yeah, like I said everything is fine and heals fast. Nothing to worry about." You say bluntly, trying to keep it short and move away from the topic.
"Can I see?"
"See what?"
"Can I just see and make sure your stomach is ok? Please y/n."
I – I can't do this. Why is she pushing this? Fuck. Come on y/n, stop shutting down.
Only able to shake your head 'no' in response, Wanda meets your eyes and sees the hurt you are trying so hard to hide.
"Please." You can hear the desperation in her voice. She just wants to make sure you are truly alright and that she didn't hurt you.
Taking a breath, you close your eyes and slowly lift your shirt up to your shoulders. You can't see the expression on Wanda's face but you know her eyes are surprised to see more than she ever expected. Of course the weights smashing into your abdomen caused bruising, but at this point the bruises are mostly healed and are just that ugly bruise color that indicates they are healing.
Wanda's hands slowly, and gently, trace the marks that are scattered across your stomach, chest and back. There has to be about 100 scars in total, all various sizes and intensity. Some are maybe a quarter inch long with no depth to them while others are upwards of 5 inches long and clearly deep due to the buildup of scar tissue that outline the scar. The longer her hands trace the scares, not saying a word, the tighter you close your eyes. Using all of your strength trying to keep your eyes closed and mind off of Wanda and her movements, knowing that with one look you will break.
She doesn't ask any questions or push you to talk. With your hands still gripping your shirt, holding at your shoulders, Wanda gently places her hands on yours and slides your hands down, dropping your shirt to cover your stomach once again. There is silence in the room, neither one of you spoke during that entire interaction. Your only form of communication was Wanda's gentle hands going over your scars and gently gliding your hands and shirt back down.
With her hands still on top of yours she breaks the silence. "You don't deserve the pain that you have experienced. Not now, not before, not ever."
She heard me earlier.
Before you could say anything Wanda pushes herself out of your bed and leaves your room, not saying another word. Never moving in bed, your mind starts racing as you only hear the emptiness of the tower. The silence of the room becomes deafening to the point you can't take it. You put your headphones on in an attempt to bring noise to the painful silence. Wanting nothing but the music to cover the sounds of your own thoughts, you spend the rest of your night fighting yourself to try and fall asleep.
I just wish she was here with me right now.
YOU ARE READING
New Recruit
Fanfiction'Wrapping your arm around her shoulders you turn to her, "Hey babe. Are you ready to head home?" She looks at you confused but quickly catches on to what you're trying to do. Glancing at the 3 men who have now slowed their pace but are still only a...
