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| Korean Words meaning |

Still none, lol.

Anything in regular font = Korean

Anything in Italics = English

Anything in Bold = Spanish

Anything in Bold & Italics = Any other language besides Spanish, Korean, or English

*Was December 10th, Now December 24th*


Christmas time had rolled over a lot sooner than I had anticipated. Felt like everyday life was swinging by. Everything was too much of a hazy blur and before I knew it another day had passed uneventfully. Everything was repetitive. Dance practice, work, performing, interviews, school work, meetings, eat, sleep, repeat.

It had only been a few weeks since the major falling out between Jimin and me, and the situation had not improved. If anything, it had worsened. Life at that moment was far from ideal. Kyong, the youngest member of 90210 and my only female idol friend had suddenly cut me out of her life entirely. It was already painful enough to lose a friend just because I knew about her struggles. I only wanted to help and support her so she wouldn't feel alone. However, my good intentions had the unintended consequence of driving Kyong away, as she feared that more people knowing about her real struggles would expose her. Losing a friend was hard enough, but it was even more devastating to find myself on non-speaking terms with my best friend, Jimin. Most days presented significant challenges.

Initially, in the aftermath of our fight, I made efforts to talk to Jimin and mend our friendship. Yet, he seemed determined to avoid me at all costs. He went out of his way to evade me, disappearing whenever there was a chance for us to be alone. He wouldn't communicate with me, though he continued talking to the other members. He even avoided making eye contact when we were in the same room. As the days passed, I grew increasingly disheartened and angry about Jimin's behavior.
Despite everything, I was the one left feeling hurt and distressed, even though he was the one who had spoken harshly to me. I made numerous attempts to engage him in conversation, but they all proved futile.

At one point, Hoseok and Seokjin attempted to lure him into a conversation in our private recording studio. When I suddenly appeared, hoping to talk to him, Jimin abruptly left the studio, storming out of the dorm. He didn't return until nearly 3 AM, and according to the other boys, he was incoherent, likely due to alcohol. The mystery of how he had obtained alcohol at his age weighed heavily on my mind.

After a week my frustration had grown into a rage and I found myself giving up and on top of it, retaliating against Jimin. I gave him a taste of his own medicine. No longer did I make efforts to notice his presence while in a room together. Whenever he entered the dorm with the boys I would excuse myself and leave.
I was treating him with the same treatment and after a day or two, he had noticed my efforts going from trying to talk to a cold shoulder.

Now we were both at an understanding of ignoring one another.
Our poor members, stuck in the middle tried multiple ways to make us work it out but nothing changed.
They still had no idea what occurred that night of the fight but now they knew for sure it was something serious. Something not easily fixed with a sit-down talk and forced eye contact.
Even still as days and weeks passed by like this. Even though I acted I was sore, which I was at one point but now the irritation had passed and at the end of the day, all I wanted again was to be friends with Jimin. My life felt so heavy without him. Mostly every day we would hang, and chat about nothing until our lungs tickled in fits of laughter. We ate together, shared everything but now I felt so cut off from everyone.
I didn't even talk much with the rest of the boys cause of it, my spirits felt diminished.

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