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~ oh come on, I just finished. ________________________________
I found myself reminiscing on the past at the absolute worst time.
They finally pronounced him dead.
"1:56 am, Jadian Smith. Dead upon arrival." The news header said.
Reading it, my heart dropped, like i've been stabbed in the chest all over again.
I saw a few text messages from the gang.
"Have you heard the news?"
"I'm sorry man."
"I wish I was there to save him."
"We'll kill whoever did this, mark my words."
But I couldn't bring myself to respond, it was my fault.
I killed him.
I fell to the floor and sobbed, I bawled my eyes out until there was nothing left.
Desperately begging and pleading for him to come back.
I was a monster.
A killer.
A murder.
I was a murderer.
. . . .
"You gotta aim at the target, you can't miss." I said, cocking my bb gun back.
"You are a sharpshooter, I can't compare with you." Jadian said,"I'm a better fighter than i'll ever be a shooter."
"One day, our fight is gonna be unmatched and we'll have to use something that we can protect ourselves with." I said.
"I just don't wanna lose to someone who can shoot, and I can't." He said looking up," I don't wanna lose to someone else.. I don't wanna die by someone else's hand."
"You won't die, ever. " I said.
"What if he's like, in the mafia or something and has a hundred bodyguards attacking us at once?" He said chuckling.
"And even then i'll protect you from anything and anyone, I promise." I said, holding my hand out.
"Ive got your back, even when the world turns its back on you. I'm here forever." He said, shaking my hand.
He was a brother, he was my family. He was my whole world in one person.
I don't like to admit how much I care about people.
It makes me look weak.
But he knows where he stood with me, and no one will ever compare to who he was.
I can't live with the guilt I now carry.
How do I live with killing my brother?
How do I keep my head held up high, when his is 6 feet under.
What do I do?
~
a/n
Hey lol, thank you for over 700 reads.. you guys are truly amazing.
i love y'all sm!
Enjoy this small snippet, there will be another chapter today :)
