Days of Remembrance 10

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A/N: So I didn't continue the smut . . . for now. But there will be more eventually. Just have to get up to it. For now, enjoy the angst train.

******

"And who says I want to live."

"You . . . you can't be . . . serious."

"If I don't get to fight, it'll feel like I'm dying anyways. What's the point of prolonging it?"

"No! There is a point to this."

"Then what is it? Because I don't understand."

"Because I want you to live Lappland. I want us to face each day together, side by side. And when we become mates, I want us to rule the pack together. I-I can't do this without you. And that's why . . . why I have to stop you from fighting. Resisting what the illness wants is the best way to combat it. In time I'm sure we'll be able to find doctors who can help you and then—"

"No. No I won't listen. I need this Texas. Fighting is a part of me. I can't just stop!"

"Well your alpha is telling you to stop, so you have to oblige, as it is tradition."

"Then I guess you can no longer be my alpha."

"You can't really mean that?"

"I do. A coward can never be my alpha, nor can she be my girlfriend."

"I'm sorry you feel that way."

"Texas . . ."

******

Lappland wanted to scream. But she had screamed so many times recently, her voice burning and raw from all the hurt she felt. The shadow of the building she took shelter behind voided the sensation of the rising sun. Her tail fur fluffed up to try abating the sensation as numbness traveled through her veins. Everything had been going so good for the longest time. But then . . .

I just had to get infected.

She still remembered the knife plunging into her skin. Their laughter at the successful attack, at how they finally injured one of their opponents. The pain was blinding with its supernova of hurt. Blood spurted from the open wound in a cascade of bright red. And no amount of careful attention prevented those dark shards from finding a home in her vulnerable veins. She should have known the blossoming darkness marked the beginning of her end. The end of everything she had with Texas.

She hates me now.

Those tears in Texas's eyes were ones she had burned in memory.

As was the looks of disappointment on her friends' faces.

Well, the ones who were there.

Aura probably hates me too though.

Some part of her knew this wasn't true, but it was hard to listen to that part of her when everything in her was hurting. That leg was aching . . . not unusual. The stiffness in her joints was another story though. As was the scrapes on her knees from when she slipped on the ice earlier.

It was with this pain that she curled up on the ground and cried for a good while.

Not that it helped her.

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