confusifying | wicked | book 3/3

Elphie

My sister stares up at me, her eyes wide and loving.
After just putting her to bed, she's unusually silent.
She felt quite hot when I picked her up but she has had her fire place on all day, due to it being winter.
Mothers in the next room, I didn't want her to be left alone but Nessa doesn't like people watching her get into bed.
"Want me to go?" I ask politely, Nessa shakes her head whilst grinning though she looks exhausted, she seems awfully childlike tonight, she keeps sighing and smiling sweetly.

"Please just stay for a little longer."
I do as she says and pull a chair from the corner of the room and position it facing the bed.
She continues to smile at me, making me feel all warm inside.
"Have you had a good day?"
"I suppose," Nessa sighs "I've got a lot of work to catch up with before the term starts."

Nessa has some sort of strategy planned out, in her head everything is going to run perfectly, smoothly and swimmingly.
Though knowing our luck I highly doubt that.
"You still have one day left for preparation." I chuckle "and knowing the speed you fill out work, that shouldn't take you too long."
Nessa smiles yet again and brings a hand up to her face, she stairs at it for a few seconds before letting it drop down softly onto the pillow beside her.
"Are you sure that you don't want me to go?"

A soft silence passes, I look around the room again and again just to allow the time to go by, but when I look back at my sister her eyes are shut and her breathing seems more fluid and controlled.
She's always looked so perfect when she's asleep, even Glinda, who is the epitome of perfection had commented on what a pretty sleeper Nessarose is.
Carefully I creep out into the hallway and back into Nessas lounge, where our mother is waiting for us.
She's sat, staring into nothing and stroking the empty space beside her on the sofa.
I cough lightly to let her know I'm there, Mother turns her head towards me, she smiles emptily.
"Is she ok?" Mother asks suddenly, she glances past me into the office.
I nod slowly and sit down beside her.
"Of course she is," I reply sounding confused, "are you worried?"
Mother sighs and strokes her hair back with her hands, she's still wearing Nessas dress.
"Of course I am," mother cries.
I smile to myself.
"That seems to be a recurring thing with Nessa," I say lovingly "people always seem to worry about her."
Mother nods then places a hand on my knee,
"I worry about you too, everything happens so fast here."

I nod, she's right everything happens at such a pace I can barley keep up.
"Sometimes it's good to worry," I say gently "it means your care."
Mother smile sorrowfully,
"I'm supposed to be the mother!" She protests "not you."
I lean back into the sofa, it's far more comfortable than the one at home.
Probably because no one sits it in unless Nessa has company.
I'm quite anxious for the school term to start, Nessa will be busy and I won't get to see her.
I dare say anything that would make her upset because I know how proud she is of herself.
Though with me not worrying about Nessa I get to spend more time with my wonderful husband.
"Elphaba." Mother whispers, her tone lowers and the mood of the room seems to drop accordingly.
I glance over at her, her eyes are shaky and uncertain.
"Your sister told me you lied about Frex."
My heart sinks, "she told me that he wasn't kind to you, why? Why would you lie to me?"

I stare at her blankly, silently irritated at Nessa for telling our mother about Frex.
"Because I didn't want you to worry, what's done is done."
Mother shakes her head,
"Elphaba that's not how it works, he was my husband I deserved to know how he treated my daughters."
I nod shamefully, though i still believe that what I did was justified.
"Did he really love Nessarose or was that a lie too."
I shake my head hurriedly.
"He did love her, he smothered her with it but his love came with some drawbacks."
Mother sits and listened to me explain about Frexpar.
About how he rarely let Nessa do things for herself, how I had to wake up early every morning to get Nessas chair in the correct location.
How I didn't get to hold my baby sister until she was about six months old.
And how they gave her so much medication that It destroyed her immune system and now she can't fight off coughs very well.
Mother looks terribly distraught, she glances nervously towards Nessas office and back to me.
"I...I had no idea" she mumbles.

"Nessa understands" I reply gently, smiling softly at my mothers concerned face. "At least I think she does."
Mother nods, though she still looks anxious.
She leans back on the sofa, closing her eyes tightly.
"I still can't get my head around the fact that I died." Mother whispers "I just left your lives, just like that."
I lean back too, placing my hands upon my knees, I gently tap my fingers against my legs.
I glance down at my hands.
I've finally gotten used to my green skin but once in a while it becomes surreal.
"Did Frex let you talk about me?" Mother asks quietly, her voice catches at Frex's name.
Upon staring up at the ceiling, I ponder the best way to answer the question.
"He never told us anything, it was too painful for him, one time Nessa screamed until her voice gave out that it wasn't fair that she didn't know her mum." I stop, scared that I might upset her.
"Elphies please continue."
I nod, not knowing if mothers eyes are open or not.
"Frex picked her up and took her away into his study, I pressed my ear up to the door and heard them both crying."
I say solemnly.
"Frexpar just kept telling her that it wasn't her fault."