Dark Secrets [Changlix]

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FELIX POV

Changbin really saved me from my ex.I regretted everything I said to him and all the things that happened between us.I just wanted him to be in my life.Should I say that I liked him.I wanted him to be with me, care for me, make my feel loved.I wanted to be as close as I could be with him.I wanted to tell him everything I went through in my past I did not want anything hidden between us and I was gonna work on that.

As soon as we got out of the car, I tugged at his sleeves making him stop.He looked towards me and I hugged him making shocking and stumble a bit.I cried and thanked him for saving me tonight.He petted my head and moved his hands up and down on my back to calm me down and I mean, it really worked.I was a lot more calm now.I asked him to stay with me tonight and he unexpectedly agreed.

He picked me up bridal style to take me to my room.I could feel the blush radiating from my neck to my cheeks.I've never felt like this, i don't know this feeling as I have never felt it.I was changing and he was taking a shower.First I thought of something full sleeves to hide my scars.No one had seen them except jisung.

I did not want to hide anything from changbin anymore.I wanted him to know everything about me.I choose a half sleeve tshirt and pajamas.As I was lying on my bed, someone knocked on the door.I did not know who it was so I did not open the door until I heard a voice.

"Felix open the door, i want to give changbin his clothes."Hyunjin said.I opened the door and took the clothes.I put the clothes on jisung's bed and was staring at the ceiling until the bathroom door opened.I looked towards the door and saw changbin in only a towel, his muscles were all on display.He had chocolate abs, his biceps omg....I looked away wanting to hide my now red face.I could not stop all the thoughts running inside my head.

He put his clothes on and layed on jisung's bed.He told me to look at him and I obviously did.I turned towards him and looked at his eyes,He patted the space next to him.I was confused and furrowed my brows.He smiled and told me sleep next to him.I was a little taken aback but still thought it was okay.

I got up from my bed and went towards him.He pulled his duvet up.I layer down and he immediately put it on me.I smiled.As soon as I layed down he put his arm around me.I was not uncomfortable.I was wearing a half sleeve t-shirt so he may have seen my scars.I flinched a little when he touched around them.His touch was very gentle and melted me in no time.He kept tracing my scars until he spoke.

"Can I ask how you got all these?"He asked a little worried not to hurt me in any way.I smiled and nodded.I was ready to tell him about it.

"They are from my past relationships.My ex was not the best.He used me for his own desires but some of them are from me."

"Today in the club was your ex you're talking about right??"He asked,I nodded and his eyes darkened.

"I only dated once"I said and he was shocked.Maybe because of my reputation.

"I know I get many confessions everyday but never dated anyone cause I never got the right feeling."I said making him nod in understandment.

"How did this all started??"He asked still looking at my scars, they really did look painfull and actually were.

"I actually dated youngmin for about 1 year,We were like a happy couple.I really did not how he was under his innocent mask.Everything was okay and on our one year anniversary he tried to sleep with me, i was really not ready....I was 19 at that time.I really was not ready so I told him to wait for me a little.He started to change from that moment.He stopped taking to me that much, always ignored me and whenever we were together he was always on his phone texting or talking to someone else.I don't know why but I still had feelings for him, so I thought maybe if I sleep with him, maybe his past self could come back and we could became happy like we were before.So I did what everybody would have done.I accepted his offer and lied to him that I was finally ready, he then smiled and looked really happy like it was the only thing he wanted from me for so long, it was all like it was planned.After that, sleeping with him became a regular thing.I was his stress reliever and I did not like that feeling at all, i wanted a genuine connection not something like I was getting.I wanted him to be gentle with me not like a wild person only caring about his pleasure.I really wanted my first to be gentle and sweet but it was nothing like I expected.It was all me crying and him moaning in pleasure and I really wanted an aftercare not to be left there and him going to his office because of his meeting at fucking 3 am and coming back after 2 days.After I told him that I could not do it anymore, thats when the things started going downhill.He forced me to sleep with him, he raped me everyday.He did opposite of everything I liked.He tied me to the bed for 3, 4 days and used me like a fucking toy.He knew I always liked when called me pet names and absolutely hated when someone called slut, whore but thats what I got.He starved me for days using me regularly.I could have died if youngmin did not forget his phone that day.I called jisung as soon as I saw it.It happened like 2 years ago but I really could not trust anyone anymore, how could I trust anybody when my parents told me what youngmin did was love.They told me it was all love and I had to keep going with it.After leaving him and cutting all contacts with my parents, i really did not want anybody else taking advantage of me thats why I never wanted any ties attached with anyone.I turned into this bad boy and fought a lot with people making me strong and a person with a fuckboy type of image but I am not like that."I said telling everything to changbin.While I was telling him all this he just stared at me and when I was finished I looked at him.He looked a little sorry.I smiled at him, showing him bright smile.

"I never knew what you went through, I'm so sorry"He said eyes a little watery.I kissed his cheek.He looked me at my eyes.

"But why did you tell me all this?"He asked now confused.

"Cause I felt something with you that I have never felt with anybody."I mumbled looking down blushing a little.

A/N
Hope you are having fun reading this book.I gave my first exam today and I think I did a pretty good job.Moreover yesterday I was writing a chapter where I was thinking of adding smut.I mean do you guys want smut in this book??I have a pretty fun question,which chapter no. do you think the story's gonna end??Please try to guess and comment I really wanna know what you guys think.