Just Breathe (Marina)

Chapter 14

Vivianas POV

Its been 3 days since I have last cut and I'm
Back in school now

I decided on not giving moms a hard time about today and we get out at 1 anyway

Currently I'm in gym and I am with Jade and we walked over to one of our Acquaintances Ava, we don't talk to her much she tends to just hang out with a bunch of guys that she has a crush on

"Oh look Devon there's you're girlfriend" she says, to him about me

Devon is the only person in my Econ class I talk to and he's pretty cool but like no

"He's not my boyfriend" I say, nothing wrong with him, but like- he's a he and I don't think I'm into that

Think anyway

Jade and I eventually walked away and back to the corner

She was an introvert as well, maybe even more than me

She is my "best" friend, meaning she doesn't know anything that goes on really, she doesn't even talk to me out side of school

Gym was boring as usual, we just walked around in circles the entire time

Once gym was over we went out separate ways to our advisory classes which only lasted half an out before lunch and I met Jade outside where we just sat and talked

"I'm so tired" I groan

"Me too" she sighs

"I just want to go home and sleep" I tell her, I wish I was at home asleep right now instead of in this hell hole

Once school let out at one I walked back to the apartment, going slowly, while I wanted to go home I also didn't at the same time

"Hey!" I heard from behind me and I turn around to see the girl i seen a few weeks ago

"Viv right?" She ask and I nod

"Emma" she says and I blush and turn away, embarrassed that I completely forgot her name

"Sorry" I say and she chuckles

"No worries" she smiles

"I have never seen you in school" I say and we keep walking

"That's because I'm assuming I don't go to your school" she says and I nod

"I'm at Seattle high" I say

"Yea I got kicked out of there...." She says

"Are you serious?" I ask and she nods

"Not my finest moment" she smiles and looks down at her phone

"Hate to run but, I got to head home before I get in trouble. Maybe I'll run into you again," she says and I nod

"Bye emma" I smile and we part ways

Once back at the apartment both of my moms cars were there

They were talking about moving soon but I don't think that's ever going to happen

I walked into the apartment and it was quiet at first Until I started to walk back the hallway and found out my parents were doing some not so innocent activities

I groaned and walked into my bedroom

Why must they be so loud!

I quickly turned up my music as loud as I could and laid in. Bed just for my moms to come in 10 minutes later and I cut my music down

"Could you be any louder?" I ask them and mom blushes

"We um.... Just-" mom says

"She knows what sex is bella" mama says and I cringe

I don't really care for my parents sex life

"We are sorry, but we forgot about you getting home early and really bambina there is nothing wrong with-" mama begins

"Stop stop stop" I say and she chuckles

"How was school?" She ask, changing the subject

"Fine" I reply

"Good, we talked about going out tonight so we're going to leave around 4:30" mom says and I nod

"Have fun" I tell them

"No viv I mean out for dinner, as in you're coming too" she says and I nod

"Oh... okay" I say and get on my phone once they leave

I laid in bed and read through some stories that were updated.

But I need more recommendations

Like seriously-

Tell me

Once that was done I put the clothes away that have been in my basket for days

I then decided to cut some music on and start cleaning up my room

It's odd how I get random burst of energy and wanting to clean spontaneously

I started on my bathroom

Surprisingly there was still blood from the other day dropped on the floor

I wiped that up and got rid of any evidence in case my moms came in or something once that was done I laid back down for a little

The spur of wanting to clean now gone as quickly as it came

That night the three of us went out to dinner which was fun

I actually enjoy spending time with my parents even if they can be embarrassing sometimes

"Alright bella, you need to shower" mama says and I glare at her

"Mama!" I reply

"Are you telling me I stink?" I ask and she chuckles

"No, I'm saying your beautiful beautiful hair needs to be washed" she says and I look at her skeptically

"It's fine to me" I shrug and she sighs

"Do you want me to wash it? Wouldn't be the first time" she smiles

"No mama it's fine" I sigh and go to my room and change

I don't know why my hair is her problem

I changed into a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. And walked out to the living room, keeping my hand on my shorts so it wouldn't ride up

"Come sit" mom says and I sit down next to her on the couch

"How are you doing?" Mom ask and I sigh

"I'm good mom" I smile

I know I told them I would come to them if I had any more urges or if I did it again but I don't want to see the pity in their eyes

"Why were you holding your shorts?" She ask

"What?" I look at her Actually confused And she picks up a loose piece of my short and drops it

"Oh just out of habit" I say, which is true

"You would tell me if you were doing it again yes?" Mom ask and I nod

"Yea mom" I sigh and lay into her

Even if her asking all the time annoys me I know she cares and just wants what's best

Mama then came and sat down on the other side of mom

"Bambina remember if you want me to do your hair I will, I really don't mind. I use to enjoy that time with you as a kid" mama says and I smile

"I will mama" I tell her

It's not even just my hair, I don't even remember the last time I shaved my legs, or anything at that matter

It's been almost a week since I showered I think,

It's terrible, honestly it is, but when I think about having to stand there and wash and shave and everything else I just don't want to anymore

I honestly wish I could fix what was wrong with me, I don't understand anything anymore

Till next time❤️

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