Obey me! Shall we date!

Mammon x Suicidal! Reader

Requested by: @Sanata101

TRIGGER WARNING!!! Mentions of Suicide/death!!! Mentions of cutting!!! Please don't read if you are sensitive with this subject!!

Soulmate Au: When one soulmate hurts themselves, the cuts or bruises appear on their soulmate.

Quote: 'She lost herself in the trees among the ever-changing leaves. She wept beneath the wild sky as stars told stories of ancient times. The flowers grew towards her light, the river called her name at night. She could not live an ordinary life with the mysteries of the universe hidden in her eyes' - Christy Ann Martine

Sometimes I don't get why others are so mean, like how they say evil things, how they think about others, I don't get it really, I don't. Some of them call themselves heroes, but where were you when the shy kid was forced to do the bullies homework, where were you when the girl with anxiety and depression killed herself in the schools bathroom, where were you, where were you when I needed help, when I couldn't and still can't handle the pain and hurting of others, you don't realize how much pain I was in, how much pain I'm still in. Do you even know? I can't even start to imagine, how you would make me feel if you found out. Would you pity me? Would you hurt the others who hurt me? Have you ever thought of acting instead of just saying, please start acting, I need you. I need you... PLEASE!!!

Everyday was different to say the least, nothing got easier it always got harder... if only my thoughts changed when I stepped foot into the Devildom, maybe I wouldn't be thinking of all the things they said to me back in the human world. Everyone here in the Devildom is nice but it's not enough anymore. It's not enough to keep the thoughts out of my head.

Finally getting out of bed, looking in the mirror at my piss poor reflection, I make a mental note that I need to put makeup on so people don't ask me questions. Getting ready for the day I look at the time, an hour before everyone else gets up, at the realization my wrists got this weird sensation on them, it was almost like they were itchy, I couldn't tell fully, but I could tell that it was annoying me greatly.

Walking towards my bathroom I grab one of my razors that I had broke, I took one of the blades a slowly pressed it on my skin, dragging it across my skin I could feel the blood slowly trickledown and out of the open wound, it hurt but it was a numbing type of pain, I was used to it, I've always done this, it's definitely not something I should be doing but I couldn't help it. I proceed to make a few more cuts until a knock on my door startled me, making me cut deeper than I normally go the blood started pouring out a bit faster as I grab a rag to prevent from dying yet. Another knock comes.

"Y/N are you awake?" So Mammon decided to wake me up today...great.

"Um!! Give me a minute!!" I say in a slightly panicked tone.

"Why do you sound PANICKED!!!! Is something wrong! Open the door!" Now he's the one panicking.

I clean up as fast as I can, I pull down my sleeves and open my bedroom door.

"Calm down I'm perfectly fine, I was just ummm... getting dressed."

"Are you sure your alright!"

"Positive now come on, weren't you supposed to make breakfast this morning?" I ask with an amused smirk as his face flared up.

"Y-yes I came to see if you wanted to help me." He says while looking away.

"Yeah, now come on we got to get started."

Time Skip

We were in the student council room have another meeting... these meetings go on for hours, they were so boring that I get lost in my mind a little to often, if I wasn't so lost I would be able to see the concerned stares everyone gives me, and the quiet talks that they have until I come back down to earth, I never realized that my face gives away what I'm feeling when I'm lost in my thoughts, how my face contorts to pain when I think about how I was thrown into a brick wall by my own parents because they didn't want me or how the school bullies beat me and smashed my head into the school sink leaving me there unconscious and bleeding out until a teacher found me. Honestly I just wished these thoughts would go away, there is one way to make them go away...