complicated; jonah marais {COMPLETED}

48. mom and daughter date

I stare at my reflection and finally liked what I saw. The black dress fit perfectly over my curves and my skin has tanned since I've been in Hawaii. Tonight my mother and I were going on a night in the town, she wants to take me to downtown, it's small but she told me at night the town was full of life with beautiful lights. I was excited to have alone time with her, I really missed spending time with her, I feel as though the lack of her in my life has taken a huge toll on me.

She knocks opening the door, "you ready?" I smile at her, she was wearing a similar dress to mine but hers was a maroon color, she looked so young and beautiful "I'm ready" I grab my bag and follow her out of the house, Robert was by the car, he tossed the keys to my mom "you two looking stunning, have a good time" he kisses my mom before walking inside. She winks at me getting into the car, I get into the passenger seat and set my bag between my legs. She turns the car on and letting the radio play, she smiles "ready?" I nod with a smile "let's go!" my enthusiasm makes her smile even more.

Driving down the curvy road I gasp at the beauty of the Hawaiian island, the vegetation and blue ass water(I love you automatically if you understand this reference) my mom turns up the radio and I just look around at the beautiful scenery, Hawaii was beautiful and I loved every part of it. Sophia told me she was taking me surfing tomorrow, ive only done it a few times and was never able to actually catch a wave so I was excited too try again. Being here helped me clear my head, all my worries, all my sadness, was gone. I felt refresh, reborn even, ive notice me change but I was worried once I was back in L.A. I would be back in that sad cycle again, emotionless, high and depressed. I was so lonely there even in a room full of people, no one by my side, no one to lean on..but the sad part is it's my own fault. I did it too myself, I hated that city but Minnesota reminded me of him. Hawaii was far from both, I was able to live freely, to be myself, and i had my mother, and my step sister who at first I didn't expect to grow so close too. Hawaii was my home away from home away from home.

My mom took me took me a small pool bar and takes the sticks out of the trunk, she tosses me one and I catch it. We walk in with eyes on us, the bar was filled with mostly men. my mom got us table and the music filled the room, we play a few rounds before I beat her one last time, "fine you win" she laughs, we leave the bar and walk down the street to the beach where the whole beach was filled with people, everyone was dancing, singing, surfing, swinging, cooking, playing in the sand and even roasting marshmallows. We found a spot to sit, my places the blanket down and we sit with our dinner. We watch the sun set on the ocean as we eat, we talk about things, anything and everything. My mom steers clear away from talking about anything to do with Jonah and I was glad, I wanted to talk about everything but him. It still hurt, but I don't know if it'll ever get easy for me. He was my childhood best friend, then I fell for him, twice, but he didn't fall for me. it makes me wonder why? Was I not good enough for him? was I never the one like I believe he is for me? All those years I felt something there..but he never felt anything, nothing at all. Maybe it's true, that someone could be your soulmate but...youre not theirs. The heartache is pain I've never thought I'd have to deal with, I try so hard not to dwell on it,to just move on but everything, literally everything reminds me of him. I mean shit, here I am thinking about him while trying to have a mom daughter date. "lucy?" my mom whispers, I jerk and look up from my glass "you okay?" I shake my head and place my empty glass down "yeah just thinking" I say, she frowns "you don't have to tell me" I shoot over to her and she wraps her arm across my shoulders, I tuck my head into her neck "it still hurts" she sighs "I know, i wish i could take it all away" she admits, she kisses my head "but its okay to feel lucy, not everyone can, not many people get the luxury to feel as much as you do but its also a sin. not everyone gets to experience the love you have for him. maybe you were meant to get heartbroken and move on too someone new, some one better, not that Jonah sucks but that's not the point" she fumbles, even though he broke my heart my mom still loves him just like his mother loves me and I can't be mad at that. "maybe you're right but its so difficult to move on when he's part of my everyday life" she caresses my head pushing my long hair behind my shoulder, "it's going to be hard, you love him sweetheart, it took me awhile to get over your father, everytime I looked at you and your brother I saw him, it took me years to finally get over him but i did it, I moved on, I fell inlove again and I married him, it's possible sweety it'll just take time, just like it took time to fall in love" she's right, she's always right but I don't know if I could trust anyone with that part of me, the vulnerability I gave too Jonah. He knew everything about me, just like my mom but I was more vulnerable with him then anyone, I trusted him with my entire life, I could get undressed I front of him and not feel the slightest bit insecure. Im too afraid to do that again, I don't want to get hurt again. "it's possible but no where near ready to move on or to love someone again" she stays silent for a few seconds, the waves clap the shore, the sound wad relaxing "that's okay but don't let it consume you" I sit up looking into her beautiful brown eyes "thanks momma, I really needed that" she smiled and kissed my cheek, "you're always welcome"

i sit up and grab the present I brought secretly "almost forgot" her mouth opens, "you didnt, I told you not to get me anything" I shuffle my head "I got it for you awhile ago, I have been waiting for the right time" she smiled, "that's sweet" she says her voice quiet, she rips open the present and she smiles wide. She pulls out the letter and reads over it, she begins to tear up and I hold her. when she's done she squeezes me tight "thank you Lucy this means so much to me" I nod for her to continue, she takes out the box and opens it, revealing three other boxes from Pandora. She gasps, "Lucile!" She only called me my first name in moments like this "you deserve it mom" she opened the necklace box, it was a heart necklace with the word 'mom' in the middle. She smiled through tears as I placed it on her neck. She opened the next box, a ring, a ring I've always knew she wanted, it had a simple diamond with small diamonds wrapped around the band, "lucile" she said again "mom come on" I laugh and she puts it on her right ring finger, she opens the last and final box, a bracelet of course. She looks at all of the charms, a heart, a home, a luck, and a boy and girl for us. She finally let her tears fall and holds me once again kissing my forehead over and over "I love you so much baby girl"

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hi um yeah this chapter is all over the place and im sorry. this story is almost over actually. don't worry there's still like 10 maybe 15 chapter left but its already met it's half way point anyway ily don't forget to follow me, I'm so close to 300 followers:))