BROOKLYN.
I can't control my feelings
I can't control my thoughts
I'm staring at the ceiling
Wondering how I got so caught.
Another night, laying in bed, with all the thoughts going around in my head, all my feelings pouring out, even though I'm laying down completely numb while looking up at the ceiling.
It was a small routine I did over the past few months. I didn't want it to happen, but it sadly did. I have fallen head over heels with Andy Fowler, not just my best friend, but also bandmate. Being in a band with him made everything harder to deal with.
Jack and Rye had found out about me crushing on Andy, which felt awful. They just simply told me that he liked me back, but how would they know. Andy has been distant to all of us, well except Mikey but they sleep in the same room so that was logically to happen. It only hurted me to see them all cuddled up together every morning almost, the loveable glances they send each other.
Little did I know that Andy's looks where meant for me, and Mikey's for Jack.
I groaned as I got my phone from the nightstand to see the time, only to be angry at myself.
4:30 AM.
I should try and sleep more before I can't do that anymore. I slowly turned around looking right Jack who's eyes where open, and full of concern and worry. I just gave him a smile before I closed my eyes to fall a sleep once again.
You're completely off limits
For more reasons than just one
But I can't stop.
The next morning rolled by and I slept until 11 AM. Not something I would do, only when something bothers me.
I walked into the living room which also presented the Mindy room, only to a sight I never wanted to see. Andy was sitting on a lap of some guy, kissing his lips like there was no tomorrow. My heart slowly broke in two pieces, then four, then six and then eight until every last bit was crumbled down like rocks.
Jack and Rye saw me looking at them before both of them jumped to action. Rye went over to me and dragged me out of the room while Jack talked with Mikey softly. Rye got me out of the apartment sitting on the stairs with me.
"You should stop falling for him Brooke. It will only hurt more." Rye softly said while giving me an sympathy look. "But I can't stop. I'm to deep already Rye." I sighed and wiped a few tears away, standing up. "I'll just have to deal with it." I mumbled and walked back inside, making myself some simple breakfast before heading to my room again. Eating in there.
You're aware of my existence
But you don't know I'm here
You're the center of attention
You control the atmosphere.
It's been a whole month since Andy had told us about his relationship with Nick.
A month since the heartbreak.
A month since I cried myself to sleep.
A month since the boy's had let me fall.
A month since I last eat a good meal.
A month without a good conversation with anyone.
I sighed as Nick was here again! It honestly made me wanna throw up. I know he and Andy are a coupe, but why rub it in my face all the time? Even Rye and Jack had stopped talking to me about how I feel. I don't care about that Andy's in the attention because I would do the same as well, but why does Nick has to be everything to?
I walked into the room again seeing that the other's where surrounding Andy and Nick again, only this time Andy looked a bit lost and uncomfortable. Once he saw me his eyes pleaded me to get him out of there, I thought I imagined it so I blinked my eyes a few times. Andy still looked helpless and pleading.
