Sia- chandelier.
ANDY.
Party boy's don't get hurt,
Can't feel anything, when will I learn.
I push it down, push it down.
"Andrew! Get back to work!" My boss yelled at me, I groaned as I was seated on the comfy couch backstage.
You see I'm an dancer in a gay club, North of Bristol. It was the only good paying job, and I could afford a small apartment and make sure my family was treated well.
I shivered as I stood behind the red satin curtains, I could already hear the music being played, making it very clear I had to go up.
"Gentleman! Here is Andy Fowler!"
I stepped away from the red satin curtains as they got pulled up, the spotlight immediately got on me.
The first days I got here it was all overwhelming for me, but now. I was the best dancer this club has ever seen.
I walked towards the end of the stage and scanned the crowd; A boy with raven messy black hair caught my eyes. Our eyes locked immediately and I smirked to him.
I ripped my shirt apart and threw it somewhere as I started to do my dance routine, which was sexual. But it is a good paying job.
I'm the one
"For a good time call"
Phone's blowin' up, ringin my doorbell.
I feel the love, feel the love.
It was just a hour after I was done with my show. I was in a room, where customer's can have fun with whatever dancer got their attention.
I know I shouldn't be proud of my job, and I'm not proud. But it gives me the money I need to support my family and myself.
Here I was laying on the bed, my ass in the air, a man behind me. He must at least be over 40, making this even more gross then it already was.
Once he finished he left me alone, naked, ashamed in the room. I slowly grabbed my clothes, shaking as I got them on. It still made me disgusted with myself for letting older man take me.
I limped out of the room, head down as I got down the stairs and back to the backstage room.
"Another rough one?" Nick asked as he helped me sit, only for me to yelp in pain and tears spill from my eyes. "The worst," I whimpered, "I hate this so much Nick." I told him as more tears fall down. Nick just held me closely as he made reassuring movements on my back, calming me down.
"I'm going home now Nick." I told him as I quickly grabbed my stuff and made it out the door.
As soon as I was far away from the club I sighed relieved, I went to a nearby supermarket to buy some alcohol. As soon as I stepped in the supermarket the sweet scent made me smile immediately.
I grabbed a few bottles of vodka, some beer and some whiskey. I got the cashier and payed for all of it and left quickly.
Only little did I know that someone was watching me, and wanting me to be safe.
I came closer to my small apartment and unlocked the door, I got my shoes off with my jacket and went to the living room. I got out all the bottles of alcohol and set it down on the kitchen counter.
1 2 3, 1 2 3 drink.
1 2 3, 1 2 3 drink.
1 2 3, 1 2 3 drink.
Throw 'em back till I lose count.
I grabbed the two bottles of Vodka, sat down against my couch and sighed.
This is what my life had become...
I took a huge sip from the bottles and before I knew it, it was empty. I rolled my eyes annoyed and grabbed the other bottle, gulping it down in at least 5 minutes to. I smiled already feeling alcohol affecting my body.
I grabbed at least two more smaller bottles of beer and gulped them down as well. I groaned and closed my eyes, falling into a deep sleep until the next morning would be knocking on my door.
I'm gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier.
I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist.
Like it doesn't exist.
I woke up in the middle of the night and could feel my head hurting as well, but I didn't care. I stood up grabbed my keys and left my apartment, I always did this.
I got home from work, get alcohol, drink it till I lose count, get drunk, fall a sleep, wake up, go out into the night, find a boy or club.
And the next day I'll do it all over again.
I walked over the street's looking for someone or a club I could waste my life in. Finally after 25 minutes ai found one, I walked inside and grinned at the sight.
I went to the bartender got a beer bottle and gulped it down with one sip. I scanned the room and grinned as I saw the raven black haired boy. I got onto the dancefloor and danced around, sometimes even doing sexual once with boy's all around.
I'm gonne fly like a bird through the night.
Feel my tears as they dry,
I'm gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier.
I felt someone grab my waist and I immediately kicked him in the place where the sun doesn't shine. I ran out of the club and just ran, making shortcuts until I was faced with a new club.
I walked through the door and just did what I did in the other club to. Until someone grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the club and into clear night sky.
But I'm holding on for dear life.
Won't look down, won't open my eyes.
Keep my glass full until morning light.
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight.
I kicked the man and ran away back to my own apartment, I unlocked it and got in, locking the door behind me. I fall down on the ground, sobbing as I curled myself up in a small ball not wanting anything anymore.
I heard a soft knock on my door and got up from my comfort ball and opened the door seeing the black raven haired boy standing there with a smile.
"My name is Michael Cobban, call me Mikey. I saw you at the club and I felt sorry."
I scoffed "I don't your pity" I spat at him, he looked shocked but quickly got his confidence face back. "Yeah I know, but you uhm," He started to blush madly "Look Andy, I'm not like the guys who treat you like trash. Let me treat you like a prince." Mikey begged me, his eyes looked genuinely real, he had no lust or anything in his eyes.
I let him inside and sat down with him on my bed.
"I won't hurt you Andy, you honestly don't remember me.?" He asked me, his voice broken. I looked at him confused until I saw his face closely and I immediately remembered him as my ex- boyfriend.
I had to leave town to work for my family, and we broke things off. Well more specific, I left him a note.
Sun is up, I'm a mess.
Gotta get out now, gotta run from this.
Here comes the same,
Here comes the same.
"Mikey look I'm-" I couldn't start before he smashed our lips together, I knew I would regret this in the morning, but fuck it.
Mikey and I had night filled with love, passion, guilt but mostly love. He made me feel loved again, he made me feel happiness and I never want it to end.
Mikey helped me quit my job, we moved back home and he helped me support my family as we both became famous songwriters.
I shouldn't have left before, but I guess we can all learn from out past mistakes to make ourselves a better future.
