Mercy (ManxBoy)

34: вє∂ σf иαιℓѕ

I'll lay you down and when all else fails,

I'll drive you like hammer on the bed of nails.

Z A I R E:

When we finally pulled into the motel parking lot, it was much too late to function. I was nervous as I pulled out the bags and took them into our rooms. We'd called Terrance on a disposable cell, and then we went by my warehouse. I got out my emergency bag, and then we were on the way. 

Because we have to avoid using any form of ID, we couldn't just cross the river into Canada, we have to drive through the US, and I'll get us through with one of my fake ID's under another name so we're untraceable. If by some little chance we are found by Jerome, we'll be the last people he sees alive. 

Thinking about things clearer now, I could see I'd been a bit irrational when I was talking to Sykes. I knew that I couldn't tell him I was in fact Witness Protection, but still. I had felt bad not saying so when I should have, but I couldn't really go back in time and change it. 

Sykes has been eerily silent the entire time, and I'd let him be figuring he'd need time to process everything I'd told him. 

I was terrified when he realized I used to be a hooker he'd up and leave me. I didn't want him to go, and I would endure any punishment he saw fit for lying to him if it meant I got to keep him. I stared at him as he laid on the bed, a grimace of pain visible on his face. I wanted to go up to him. I wanted to hold him, and I wanted to forget that any of this was happening, but I knew I couldn't. 

It was foolish of me to think that I could have a normal life after testifying against a gang-banger with a rap sheet as long as my arm. I shouldn't have signed the contract with Sykes when I wasn't sure what would happen with Jerome, but I couldn't help myself. He made me feel good, happy... That isn't something most people can say. 

"Zaire." Sykes said softly and I looked up at him. "Strip and kneel." he commanded. I immediately did so, not bothering to question him. 

Frankly, I don't have the right to ask him anything when I hadn't been one hundred percent honest with him when I told him about my past--more importantly, why I left Cali. 

I felt his eyes burning holes into my skin as he stared at me silently. I didn't dare move from the position he'd commanded me to be in. Even as time ticked by and he didn't speak, he only observed me.

"I understand why you couldn't tell me." He finally said. "What has me so very pissed off and confused is why you would think you could just up and leave, no questions asked." He looked genuinely pissed off and I could definitely understand why. 

The way I said it was wrong, I didn't mean I was just going to leave, I just said I needed to get it. But if Jerome was a threat to Sykes or Alexei, I wouldn't hesitate to leave to protect them. 

I hate the fact that I have to think about this. I hate that I have to feel this way. I hate that I made the decision to testify in that damned trial. I hate that for the rest of my life, I'd have to look over my shoulder. I hate that this is happening to Sykes, and to Alexei. Neither of them deserved this and I knew I was in the wrong even if I didn't mean to cause this to happen.

"Alexei is going to be fine." Sykes said softly. "Terrance is going to keep him, and Terrance's lover is excellent with children. Terrance is a trained navy seal, but he stopped working for them for reasons unbeknownst to even I." I nodded my head, and looked down at the floor. "Look up at me." He commanded. I looked up into his dark eyes, suddenly feeling twelve times worse than I did before. 

I can't believe I didn't tell him sooner. If he had of known, he might not would have gotten shot. He might not have been in this situation at all.