Look, it's complicated !

5 months pregnant and this can't be happening

(Zosia)

I am now 5 months pregnant and I feel so sick. The baby has been moving around a lot and it's been hurting me like hell. "Zosh,I'm going to the shop do you want anything?" "Um, can I have some paracetamol please Ollie." "Sure, I'll be back in an hour." So now I'm left all by myself, my stomach hurting and my head pounding, great! All of a sudden I fell to the floor in pain as a puddle of water laid before my eyes. This can't be, has my water broken? It is 4 months too early. I'm not ready to give birth yet. I needed to ring Ollie so I stumbled on my knees to the phone and began to dial his number. "Hi zosh, what's wrong?" "Well, the baby is coming, my water has broken and I need you here fast." "But,but..... Your 4 months early." "I know but it is ready and I need you to be here." "I'll be there straight away." I was so happy to hear Ollie's voice as it comforted me and it made me feel that everything would be alright.

(Ollie)

I can't believe that Leah is coming 4 months early, she is going to be tiny. I ran through the door to find Zosia on the floor in a puddle of water. "It's ok now zosh, I'm here." I kissed the top of her head and tried to lift her up. I carried her out to the car and drove as quickly as I could but in the safest way possible for the baby and for zosh. We got to holby where we was met by Jac as I texted her only moments before we left in the car. "Ollie, get mr t and I will help Zosia, it's a girl thing." "Ok, zosh I'll be back as soon as I can, I will not miss you giving birth." "Ahh,oww" "it's ok Zosia, when I had Emma I was exactly the same, let's get you to a hospital bed."

(Jac)

I felt zosias pain as I had been through this with Emma. I carried Zosia into the baby unit and laid her on an iron barred hospital bed. Ollie soon came in with mr t running as quickly as they could. "Right Zosia, I'm just going to quickly check on the baby, this is going to be very cold." Mr t placed the gel on zosias stomach and used the monitor to see the baby. "Right, there is nothing to be worried about but your baby is in distress. We need to get her out, now!" "But I'm not ready to have a baby, I'm just not." "Look Zosia, every parent never feels ready but as soon as the baby is born you immediately think, that's my child and I will do my best for her. All of your troubles will go and you will just love her unconditionally. It will be the instant connection that will make you feel safe and it will make you feel as though everything will be fine. It is one hell of a journey but it will be the best journey you would of ever been on. The road may be bumpy and you may loose your path but in the end there is light at the end of the tunnel." My words made Zosia see sense so she nodded to mr t as they wheeled Zosia off to the birth unit with Ollie close behind her. "Oh, and Jac, I want you to be the god parent." Zosias words was like music to my ears. "Why me?" I was quiet confused. "As I know that you will be there for me and Leah and Ollie all of the time."

(Zosia)

The pain was unbearable. Ollie was holding my right hand whilst Jac was holding my left. I felt safe yet unsure of what the future would hold. What if Ollie left me? What if he couldn't cope with being a dad? What if my bipolar got worse? It was too late to turn back as with one large push I heard the scream of life. My baby has been born and it's one of the happiest days of my life.