Together

92. I have you

Yeah I wanted to play tough
Thought I could do all this on my own
But even Superwoman sometimes needed Superman's soul
Help me out of this hell
Your love lifts me up like helium
Your love lifts me up when I'm down down down
When I hit the ground you're all I need
-Sia

JJ walks out of the Carrera residence, hands in his pockets. The night is silent as he strolls to his bike, parked at the far end of the drive way. All the trick or treaters have long since called it a night. No doubt anyone out at this hour, causing trouble or otherwise would be chased away by the neighborhood security patrol if spotted.

Overall, things could have been a lot worse. Mike giving him a warning, of all things, was not the expected reprimand that JJ was prepared for. Not that he was complaining. Just felt weird to be on an end of Mike that didn't end in being yelled at, literally.

JJ was never really on the receiving end of a conversation about his future that didn't end up with him being told he's going to end up in jail. Mike of all people telling him, directly might he add, that he actually has something good going for him and to not fuck it up was an experience that described the very long road he and the older man had gone down.

Made him want to smirk at the progress they've made. Who would have thought that he'd actually be on the approving side of Mike Carrera?

JJ remembers what Shoupe told him months ago when Mike and Anna found out about him giving Kie the Jeep. He thought that they'd made their minds up and that any effort to change it was a lost cause. Shoupe encouraged him to try anyway. Best advice he's ever taken.

Which is why he should take the win and go home. It'd probably fall under the category of risking it by climbing up Kie's window. Probably stupid, considering the warning he'd been given.

"Stupid ideas have good outcomes all the time," he whispers to himself, as he pushes his bike behind the shed in the backyard.

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Kie tosses and turns restlessly as she lies in bed. She's trying to stay awake. Her now minor buzz was making sleep inevitable, but she doesn't want to find slumber yet.

Aside from having been disciplined by her dad in front of her boyfriend, the end of the night was nice. She finally felt like she could breathe again. A huge weight was off her chest after coming clean with JJ on the dock. He finally knew everything and she had no secrets. That more than anything lifted her higher.

The only hang up she was having currently is that she knows that she isn't going to be seeing him any time soon. That reality feels like her nightmares are banging on her closet door; like a monster waiting to be let out of it's cage and she's terrified of closing her eyes lest they enter her unconsciousness.

After being so open she is finding she needs him. Needs him to feel safe. Honestly, needs to keep being open with him. She couldn't believe how much better she felt after telling him what's been going on.

But one of Mike and Anna's biggest complaints about the Pogues, specifically JJ, was her smoking weed with them. Him coming right out and confirming he's who gives it to her was surely the final nail in the coffin. The idiot.

She shakes her head at his attempt to protect her. He's so used to being the one to blame that he fell into the role without question. It's exactly why he took the fall for Pope sinking Topper's boat last year.

He wants to protect everyone and doesn't think about himself. No doubt he thought if he owned up to it that it would spare her further wrath. Hoping her dad would rather blame him as a corrupting influence than think she was at fault. She couldn't even deny that was a common response over the years.