16. Ultimatum

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And I don't know
How we make it out when we make out on the low
Even if it rains you rather make it snow
Both you and me know we gotta let it go
Laying on the ground
Wondering why it's so cold
-boy in space

JJ flings himself on his bed when he gets home after work. He's physically and emotionally exhausted. He has had a tight knot in his stomach since his conversation with Mike Carrera that he can't unclench. He's been replaying it all day.

Mike told him that Kie wasn't aware that boarding school was on the table. He said that she'd never have to know. All he wanted was for JJ to let her go and that would be that. Apparently, they were going to look at colleges, as Kie suspected, and that's all she would have to think this trip was about.

"I don't want to upset her if I don't have to," Mike commented.

JJ wanted to choke. Like him breaking up with her wasn't going to destroy her. Did Mike really have no idea how much they cared for each other? Did he think that JJ was just the next in a line of boyfriends he would need to beat back with a stick until they moved on to the next girl?

Fuck him.

When Mike left JJ literally threw up over the side of the dock. His chest burned at the burden of the choice he had to make.

Mike was very clear, JJ had to do it soon. He had a tour set up with one of the boarding schools towards the end of the trip. That was JJ's deadline. End it before they returned, or Mike would follow through on his threat and sign her up on the spot.

This had to be a nightmare. JJ shut his eyes and prayed he would wake up. He didn't. He swallowed thickly, grabbing his hair as he tried to breathe. His thoughts ran wild, and he didn't attempt to stop them. If ever there was a time to spiral it would be now.

His overwhelming feelings for Kie were making him selfish and he knew it. He wished he could have said that when given the choice he didn't think twice. That he was obviously going to end it. He couldn't risk her leaving the OBX, especially for him. It would kill her.

But he had a greedy side. He wanted to keep her. He wanted to tell Mike to go to hell, there was no way he was leaving her. Nothing about Mike's threat changed the way he felt about her and no matter what happened next, he was going to love her regardless.

The knowledge of the agony he would be in if he were to leave her has him reeling.

He wishes this wasn't his choice. Why did it have to fall to him? He then remembers what Mike told him on the dock.

She's obviously not gonna to drop you on her own

No, she wouldn't. Kie clearly knew how serious her parents were about her not seeing him. Mike made it seem like she knew there would be a consequence. Why didn't she fucking tell him about it? Maybe then he wouldn't have been so goddamn blindsided.

For a moment he didn't care about Mike's threat. Let him try and take her away, he thought. He pulled out his phone and swiped up to get to Kie's contact. He begins typing a message, telling her that her dad is threatening to send her away. That he wants to literally rip them apart and he's willing to send her to boarding school to do it.

It's all typed out and he hovers over the send button. He back spaces instead.

Sending a message like that would be the end of everything, them included. He would never see her again for sure. Kie would go ballistic on her parents over it. She would be proving their point.

That she's too involved with him. That she would risk being sent across the country to be with him. They'd call it unhealthy, and needy. They'd accuse her love of being emotionally dependent.

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