Can you heal old scars?

Chapter 57

The morning came far too soon for Quin's liking, his mind still reeling from the events of the past days.

He lay quietly as Ryan's warm breath fell against his fur, not wanting to move. He felt the comfort and safety of being close to Ryan that he didn't want to let go of, but he also knew that when Ryan woke up he would have to change back into human form.

Quin sighed as his emotions fought with themselves, the negative ideas and self view he had, being contradicted by the love and acceptance he had been shown from everyone who meant anything to him.

The biggest thing that finally kicked his negativity back into the pit was the feel of the bond, Ryan's thoughts even in his sleep were ones of love and care and in an odd way it felt almost like the bond was trying to heal his emotional damage. It danced around the edge of the pit, gentle and warm like it was waiting for something...

Ryan had said that the bond could help with healing, however Quin never thought that would work for psychological wounds...

Quin lay still closing his eyes, he took a few calming breaths and let the feeling of the bond wash over him.

At first it started off as a gentle calming feeling, slowly relaxing his mind of the anxiety that had always held tightly to his every thought. Then the sensation intensified, a deep almost pulsing heat penetrating into that blasted pit inside him.

Quin's first instinct was to fight, that pit was the only thing that allowed him to function... Admittedly the time between kicking his emotions into the hole, and their inevitable escape was becoming less and less, but it had been all he knew.

But Quin was so tired... Tired of the constant battle between himself and his own mind, the never ending fight to keep from falling into that pit himself and never being able to climb out.

He didn't want to deal with this struggle anymore, didn't want to have his own thoughts be his enemy. He just wanted to be happy, to be with Ryan and the pack...

With another steady breath he relaxed himself and the heat sunk into the pit, the feeling so visceral it took his breath away.

Tears spilled from his eyes as every hurt, every pain played before him. Only this time as he relived it, he didn't feel alone...

There was a constant loving presence there, holding him and protecting him. Telling him that he was not responsible, that he deserved better... Everything became a blur of emotions as the warmth dug deeply into his very core and held him, the sheer relief was almost painfully overwhelming and cathartic in a way that Quin had never felt before.

Quin felt something change, he couldn't fully understand what had changed, but as the warmth slowly slipped from his core and out of the pit inside, things felt different. It just didn't feel quite so deep...

A sudden tingling flowed over Quin's body and his form shifted back into his human shape, an odd sort of tranquil state taking over as he turned and pushed himself into Ryan's chest inhaling his scent.

Quin couldn't deny how good it felt to stop fighting, to simply accept and acknowledge the reality he now existed in.

Things were different now, and he didn't need to continue to allow the pain of his past to damage the hope he now had for his future.

No he wasn't "fixed" yet, but if he just let the bond do it's magic, stopped allowing the impulse to push everything away take hold then... maybe he could finally heal the damage deep inside.

Ryan slowly began to stir, his arms curling around Quin's back and instinctively holding him close to his body. It was a few sleepy moments before Ryan realized that Quin was back in human form, his heart skipping a beat as he opened his eyes to see Quin's beautiful face looking back.