Can you heal old scars?

Chapter 42

Warning- Sexual content

That evening as Ryan and Quin got ready for bed, Quin seemed nervous. Ryan wasn't sure why but he seemed like he was waiting for something, as Ryan collected his things before heading to the bathroom.

Ryan washed and shaved, drying his hair as he brushed his teeth. He looked at himself in the mirror, dark bags had settled under his eyes and he seemed to have a permanent frown on his face lately.

He sighed as he rinsed his toothbrush and grabbed his clothes, heading back to the bedroom.

Quin was sat on the edge of the bed, clutching his bag of bath products and his bathrobe. As soon as Ryan entered the room, Quin jumped up and left without a second glance.

Ryan put his dirty clothes in the washing basket and sat on the bed, confused and rather worried.

Quin had been distant since the night of the fight, and Ryan was wary of approaching him now. He knew he had gone too far, even though he hadn't done anything, Quin's reaction was clear. He had been afraid, and Ryan hated that he had caused Quin to feel that way.

Ryan was now scared to approach Quin, what if he caused Quin to have a flashback, what if he ran away again? He couldn't afford for that to happen right now, they needed to appear to everyone else as a strong and united couple, regardless of what was going on privately.

He grabbed his book from the bedside table and tried to read a little, hoping the distraction would ease the concern building within him. Did Quin not want him anymore, had he ruined things between them?

Quin entered the bathroom and shut the door, locking it quickly before putting his things down. He wasn't sure why he was so nervous, it wasn't like he hadn't masturbated before...

But this was different... he had never even thought to try this, it was never something that crossed his mind.

And why would it? Having something inside him like that had never been a good experience, could it really ever feel pleasurable?

Quin turned on the shower and stripped off his clothes, trying to stop all the rapid thoughts in his head and focus on getting himself in the mood.

He stepped into the hot shower and tried to relax, trying to focus on the thought of Ryan. Quin focussed on his scent, the way his skin felt under his fingers, how the muscles of his biceps moved and flexed as he held Quin, the way Quin's heart raced to feel Ryan's dick hard against his own...

Quin slowly began running his hands across his skin, remembering how Ryan had played with his nipple that first night, the feel of Ryan's hands running down his abs.

Quin tweaked the piercing in his nipple and bit his lip, a quiet moan rumbling in his throat.

The more he played with himself, the more his mind melted into that warm heat that spread throughout his body. His hand found his dick hard, and he gently teased the tip with his fingers trying to replicate Ryan's movements again.

He had to admit to himself that even though the idea of letting go of control so completely to Ryan, and allowing him to mount... to penetrate him was nerve-wracking, the times he had given up some control and allowed Ryan to take the lead had felt oddly comforting.

Not having to think about what was happening in any other way than what he was feeling, just relaxing into Ryan's embrace... It was an odd turn on.

Quin had always had it in his mind that he would never feel comfortable in any other role than the dominant, the one in control. Having spent years being beaten into submission, that position seemed tainted to him. To submit in that situation was a degrading and humiliating experience, however it hadn't felt like that with Ryan.