Never Say Never

22. Out of Control

                                                                                  J O S H

I tried really hard to push the anger away, but it was so hard to. It hurt like hell that I was not there to support my best friend. Kat tries to talk like nothing has changed, but something has, and she is married now. What the hell were they thinking? We sit in the truck and Ryder practically pushed me in the back seat with Kat.

"Deal with your shit." Is all he said as he slammed the door shut.

"Josh, I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you, but I didn't want to tell you over the phone or through text."

"I should have been there. We have talked about this since we were kids. It fucking hurts." I will myself not to cry. Maybe I am being overdramatic, but I can't help my emotions at the moment.  I look at her and I see her lip tremble, I can tell she is on the verge of tears. A deep breath escapes me as I pull her into my side, and she hugs herself to my body.

"I'm so sorry Joshy." I kiss the top of her head as I hold her close. But I am not being fair to her because I never told her what happened between Ryder and I two months ago. "So am I Kat." I pull back and wipe the single tear off her pretty face. "I wanted to be there for you, but I am here for you now." She hugs me again and I hold her tighter. I look up and see Ryder look at me through the rearview mirror giving me a nod.

I give her a smile even though it is not one of my most genuine smiles, and I think she knows I am trying to get past this. "I guess we have a reason to celebrate." She hugs me again as the truck comes to a stop and I notice we have arrived at Lion's Den. "I will want to hear all the details when I am sober." I shove her shoulder lightly as we enter the club and I hear Ryder grunt from beside me.

"You're not getting drunk."

"Yes, daddy." I roll my eyes but stop when I see the look in his eyes. Oh shit! I am so fucked. I move away from him and head to the bar to order drinks and I order a lot of them. Kat and I carry them to a booth that Johnny and Ryder are sitting at. Johnny is laughing and pointing to the dancefloor where Jaxon and Lucas look like they are ready to fuck right then and there.

"I'll go pry them off of each other." Johnny says as he walks towards them.

"He's got a death wish." I laugh as we watch with amusement as he goes to them and if looks could kill, I don't wish to be him. They walk back towards us, and Johnny grabs a shot. Jaxon and Lucas already have their shots to their lips when Johnny speaks. "To my beautiful wife." That is when the drinks go spraying from their lips as they look between the two.

"What the fuck!" Jaxon says and I laugh. "Trust me that's what I said." I mumble but Kat gives me look of hurt and I try to shake off the guilt. I said I would not do this, and I already am being a dick.

I raise my shot glass and look at my best friend. "To the only girl I will ever love." When she looks at me, she gives me a bright smile. "Here is to the happiness you deserve." I turn to Johnny and glare at him the best I can to be intimidating. "If you ever hurt her or make her cry, I will make Loraina Bobbit look like a fucking saint." I give him the sweetest smile I can muster as Jax and Lucas start to laugh and Ryder's lips twitch as he fights off his smile.

"Dually noted." Johnny takes his shot and downs it. 

"I am truly happy for you both even if I wasn't there." I say as I take another shot, then another.

"Well, we were thinking of having a wedding, nothing big. Just something for family and close friends." Johnny says and Kat takes my hand and I look at her. "I would like you to walk me down the aisle." I hug her tightly to me but pull back and shake my head. "I can't your dad would kill me."