Argumentative Measures

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tw: arguments, yelling, angry seggs lol
smut warning teehee

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I sat in the bay window, watching the rain fall out of the sky and onto the leaves of the trees, then down into the street.

I sighed, looking down at my book in my hand and knowing that every bit of information inside the pages was significant for me... for us... right now. It had been recommended to me by a friend from work. She suggested it after I had drunkenly ranted to her about how I felt my relationship was falling apart. 

The thing was...  I want to be everything to him. I want to be able to accomplish anything and everything he ever needed and to be the absolute best thing that he needs me to be. I want to show him that I'm strong... that I don't need him to be my protector. Even though... on the same hand, I wanted him to be.

As much as I loved him and as much as I wanted to be all of these said things... I couldn't. I've never had the willpower or mental strength to get to those places. To be those things. And now... now that I need it more than ever... I can't. 

I flipped through the pages of the book, stopping when something caught my eye. 

Repetitive Arguments, What this means and how it can effect us.

I sighed again. I loved him to death but... things have just been so fucking hard for us. Why can't things just go back to the way they used to be? I've been trying so hard for us to get better but they just haven't been. One day we're fine and then the next we're screaming at each other. 

I heard the front door click open, and my heart dropped. I quickly jumped to my feet, shoving the book I had in my hands into the place where I had been hiding it for the past few weeks.

"Hey, babe." I heard Corpse yell from the other room. 
"Hi." I replied quietly, walking into the kitchen where he now was.
"I said hello." he said sternly yet jokingly, lifting my chin and giving me a soft kiss on the lips.
"And I said hi." I said back sarcastically. 

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. 
"Stop. Don't be like that. Not tonight." 
"What? What are you talking about, I didn't even do anything?" I asked. 
"Don't play dumb, Y/N. You know what you're doing and I'm not having it tonight. Stop it." He said. 

I just shrugged, beginning to walk away. 
"Fine. Be like that then." I said under my breath."

But then, all of a sudden. I don't know what clicked inside of him, but in less than 3 seconds, we were screaming at each other.

Again.

The argument sort of went by in a blur... either that, or my mind just chose to block it out. 

"Well I get home from work after busting my fucking ass since 6 am, and I can't even come home to someone who appreciates me being here? I can't even get a proper hello when I come in? I can't be offered something to eat or offered to hang out or even a kiss? You're my girlfriend, N/N, you can't just expect me to do everything all the time!" he yelled.

"Well I get to sit here and do fucking nothing all day because I'm struggling to get a job and I'm not fucking good at anything so I don't have any hobbies! I just sit here and play on my phone all day hoping that maybe, just maybe you'll come home in a decent mood. I hope that maybe some day you'll realize that the world doesn't revolve around you!" I screamed back.

We continued like that, going back and forth and back and forth until finally I just cut him off.

"I think we need to take a break." I whispered.

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