Black & White || BTS FF

Chapter 32: Hate

Your eyes watered as you finished telling the story.

Taehyung was silent, his face void of any emotion. He just listened as you continued with a shaky voice.

"I was injured, and broke my arm in two spots. But I was discharged after a couple days.... with nowhere to go. Everything's fuzzy in my memory... I don't- I don't remember who I stayed with..."

You sighed, not meeting his eyes.

"Aunty was clear after a week.... but you... you- were the worst out of everyone. You went into emergency surgery as soon as you were out of the ambulance.... and you came out but-"

You took in another shaky breath. You voice was barely as whisper as you relived the hardest time of your life.

You didn't want to remember.

"You didn't wake up.... they said it was a coma- cerebral hypoxia, specifically. 'Means you effectively had brain damage, in short, but there's many more complications that come with it. They didn't know when you would wake up... if you would wake up, and what effects could come with it. They mentioned things like hallucinations, coordination problems, and.... memory loss.

"It was so long... so long Taehyung, it's hard to describe.... days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months.... every hour was agony by the end. I began to think you'd never wake up... but Aunty would always say, 'He's a fighter, Y/N, don't worry. He'll be fine.' 

"We both waited anxiously in the hope you'd wake up... but 1 month passed and you were still lying on that damn hospital bed. 2 months, and you hadn't moved an inch. 3 months..... I probably looked like a walking dead by then. I felt as if life had no meaning.... that's just how much you mean to me, Tae.... I had no motivation to keep living anymore, and I was only 9! Nine, and I nearly gave up!"

You stopped your story for a moment, running your hands through your hair as you remembered the painful memories.

You were so young, yet you had experienced something that would haunt you for the rest of your days.

You ghosted a smile as you continued, but the emotion didn't reach your eyes.

"I vividly remember the day you woke up, though. I was sitting next to your bed, holding onto your hand, resting my head on your stomach. Aunty sat asleep in the chair. I was drifting off, but then I felt your finger twitch.

"My heart started racing as I jolted upright to look at you, squeezing your hand tightly. I called your name, and started tapping you gently as you shifted in your position."

Your smile fell. You looked at the ground again, drowning in many emotions as you remembered.

"But when you opened your eyes- I knew something was wrong. I didn't have to be a doctor to know. Something wasn't registering with you.... it was like you'd... forgotten...

"You knew me, but you didn't.... it was like.... I was some figure buried deep inside your conscience, and you didn't quite know what you were seeing. Because you whispered my name, really quietly, but you didn't seem quite sure of yourself. My name was more of a question."

Absently, you checked the time.

8:42pm.

There was no rush.

"I was scared. So scared. After all I'd been through, I didn't want any bad news when my hopes were high. I woke Aunty up and she called the doctors. I stayed in the room with you while the a doctor took Aunty out and gave a diagnosis of some sort. She later told me everything. The doctors said you had dissociative amnesia.... and while you remembered Aunty and I, you'd forgotten.... so much... there was a massive gap in your memory, and-"