Found (BxB)

CHAPTER 49

Kaden Prince

Ethan didn't say a word during the entire ride.

He didn't even cry. He just sat there, with his forehead pressed against the cold surface of the window as he watched the raindrops fall from the grey sky. I had never seen him distant before. Usually, when something went wrong, he cried, broke down, told me what he was feeling, but he never simply didn't react in any way.

It worried me. I'd rather he screamed, got mad... God, he could even slap me if that meant he was reacting somehow. But I got nothing. I just wanted to comfort him, and I thought that giving him the space he needed right now was the best way, so I didn't try to talk to him. It was all too recent, and I knew way too well how it was when we felt too much, so we turned our feelings off so we wouldn't suffer so much. It was better to feel, though. I learnt that. But he just needed a time. And if he didn't come back after a while, I'd rescue him.

I understood his need to not feel anything, I really did. It all went downhill at once. He was outted to everyone of the school, humiliated by Jack, kicked out of his house, rejected by his mother, and abandoned by his brother. All in one single day.

I placed my hand over his that rested on his lap as we neared my house to show him that he was not alone somehow, but that didn't provoke any reaction of his. He didn't pull his hand away, but he also didn't hold mine. I tried not to bother, because I shouldn't be thinking about myself in this moment, yet I couldn't help but wonder if Ethan would distance himself away from me now that this all happened. Maybe feelings he had when he had internalized homophobia came back, and now he was disgusted again, now he didn't want someone who reminded him of this part of him.

I shook my head, feeling guilty for thinking about our relationship when I actually should be thinking about his well-being. I parked in front of my house, turning to the side to eye Ethan, who was still looking through the window. He viewed the house for a few seconds before opening the door of the car and leaving; his hand slipping away from mine as he did so.

"Shit" I muttered under my breath before following his lead and leaving my car.

I prayed to no one be in the living room once we entered the house, because I knew Ethan would want to be polite to my family, but he didn't have the mind to do that right now. Thankfully, no one was in there, and I could lead Ethan to my room without anyone bothering him. Except for me. Maybe I was bothering him. But there was nothing I could do about that... Well, maybe I could sleep on the couch...

"How did you know where I was?" Ethan's voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

He was sitting on the edge of my bed, looking down at his lap while he played with his own fingers. Ethan was still wearing the clothes he wore when we were at the graveyard, and his voice was nothing more than a whisper, but there was no sign of him crying in it.

"Will called me and told me what happened" I replied as I kneeled down to take off his shoes. I didn't know if he wanted to take a shower, sleep, or simply stay on my bed watching something on TV, but taking off his shoes would make him more comfortable. He made no sign of protest, so I continued on untying his shoelaces "It was a lucky guess"

"Hm" He hummed.

"Do you want to take a shower?" I looked up at him and asked "I can lend you some clothes"

"Okay" He nodded, then his gaze was lost again, now directed at some random point of my wall.

He made no move of moving, so my hands trailed to the waistband of his pants. He didn't do anything, so I unbuttoned then unzipped his pants. Honestly, I just wanted to take his clothes off so he could take a shower. I wouldn't do anything. He was sad, and I'd respect that. It wouldn't feel right hitting on him while he was suffering. I just wanted him to feel better.