"He'd always been a man who followed his head and not his heart.The heart was just a bloody motor.The head was meant to drive"
Mario Puzo~
*Next Morning at the hospital*
"Mrs Jackson, your... uh"
"Husband my husband doctor"
"Oh yeah of course your husband Mr Jackson...i know its hard to tell you this but he has an drug addiction, we're not talking about hard drugs but a lighter form of drugs which are painkillers. We found throughout scans and blood tests that Mr Jackson has been using them regularly on a daily basis, and it just happens that his body reacted to it recently and if it happend later... Michael wouldn't be with us right now, he already has a large amount of dosis inside his body one more and he really wont make it."
"So he was drugging himself with painkillers? He wasn't even in pain why would he do this?"
"Usually people start an addiction due to a trauma that has occurred a recent one or one from the past. If that person didn't get the help he needed he might try to numb the pain in his own way just like this. Mr Jackson has become dependent on painkillers and he did it behind your back so you wouldn't notice. He is making himself suffer without wanting you or any of his loved ones to find out."
I was shocked i didn't see this coming. I never thought that Michael would do this to himself. He never told me all about his past just how he didn't had a childhood, but he never got into the details with me. I felt so guilty for never being aware that he was dealing with demons from the past.
"So Michael is traumatized doctor i think i know what it might be about but i want him to explain everything.... please help him doctor."
"Thats my job miss, im going to check on another patient you can go back and check on him he can wake up any minute right now."
I nod my head and walked out the doctors office straight to Michaels room and as i walked in i just froze in my place.
"I..im so s..sorry I..imani"
Michael stood next to his bed holding god knows how many painkillers in his hand while holding a glass of water on the other.
"Put that down Michael.."
"Why? Huh.....why do you want me to still live after e..everything i did to you...im not who you think iam..."
He looked confused and so terrified.. it was as if i was a monster standing in front of him.
"Michael please don't do this what are you doing? baby please stop....i know who you are only i know."
"Y..you don't understand.... the mafia was my living drug... i was numbed..numbed from the pain and sufferings... you can't marry me i'm not worth it."
"Baby stop saying that you're not yourself please Michael i beg you don't make me call the doctor... why didn't you tell me?"
"I.. deserved this i never wanted you to suffer with me.... its you and Makena that kept me strong enough to leave the m..mafia.. but now i can't stay here... i made so many huge mistakes.. you wouldn't have suffered a minute if it wasn't for me being alive.."
"No thats not true baby....Don't do this please baby i..im pregnant we're having another baby on the way.... please don't leave me alone with our kids.. this was not the plan that we had... we wanted a bigger family.... a big house... get married and have a real wedding..... are you really leaving me with one little child and an unborn one..." my lips were quivering at this moment i turned into a scared little kid who was afraid of the dark.. but i was afraid of losing the light in my life.
"I..imani you don't understand how much i love you... i will never forgive myself for my actions i don't deserve you... i really don't im a damaged son of a bi...."
"You're the best thing that ever happend to me Michael! Please shut up and think! Even if i didn't met you in this way i would've been dead a long time ago... my father was using me Michael! my own father who fucking brought me into this world... i wasn't his daughter i was his accountant i had to launder his dirty money without knowing..." i chuckled crazily because it was the painful truth.
"I was his ATM machine Michael all he wanted me for was money and his job... he even made me the fucking heiress of a mafia organization.. he had it all on a contract if he died with all the frauds and lies and unpaid money i..i wouldn't be standing here today b..baby..."
"B..but t.."
"Oh please! Fuck this whole abuse thing! I deserved it, i was doing a dirty job just like you did and i paid for it real good! I loved you the very moment you opened up to me... the little good moments we shared felt like a happy marriage to me.... it was as if We could relate to each other.... you hurt me really badly, you assaulted me and raped me.... just think why aren't you in jail or dead right now? I could've had ended your life the moment we had an lawyer... the talks i had with our lawyer alone... you trusted me that much you let me be alone at so many time where i could've seeked revenge... but did i? NO!"
"Imani how can you love someone who did all of this to you how? I don't fucking understand.."
"How? How could you drug yourself everyday without me never noticing..... how did you have the nerve to plan in that head of yours that you wanted to kill yourself because of something that happend to you that isn't happening anymore.... Michael i suffered from you and you suffered from your family... im not suffering anymore...even better you gave me a new meaning of life... i'm living the average life now that we didn't have.. a family, house , job... we can fix all the big gaps that we have.
Michael looked at me and balled his fist the one that he was holding the painkillers with.
"Michael this is not you this i not the Michael i fell for.. not the evil one n'or the weak one i fell for the real Michael the one i want to marry is not standing in front of me.... we both need help."
"You think so?"
"I do baby we both need help what we experienced only happens in movies.. you don't hear these stories in real life... i just really realized that we need some
Serious help not just for us but for our children... we need to recover and we will baby just
Promise me you will never touch these pills again. Not just for me but for your babies to.. Lets be real
Lovers, hard lovers and most important badass parents to our babies."
We both looked at each other and chuckled softly, our eyes were watery the realization had finally hit us. It was the both of us that were traumatized and that needed help.
"When are we going to therapy Imani?"
"When the man i love recovers and returns back home."
"I promise you..."
"Applehead"
"Stop itt" michael chuckled.
NEW CHAPTER IS UP!!!
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To any person that has/had an traumatizing or horrible experience.. just know that you're not alone in this and that life is the most precious gift to every human being. You are stronger than you think.
I hope you liked this chapter❤️ and i hope that we can enter 2021 in peace and happiness.
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Black Guerrilla MJ- 18+
Action(Warning! This story contains: Abuse, sexual content,drugs, strong language and Violence.) What would you do if you were kidnapped into the dark underworld full of drugs trafficking, mafia's and thieves and to your great surprise also to be replaced...
