Satan School of Sophomores

Cat Nightmare: 11/18/14

9:14pm Tuesday, November 18

All I gotta say is
1. It's so fun to be a fan girl at times. I go read fan fiction, smut, look at hot photos of 5sos, listen to their music. Oh what fun.

2. I have this moderately long story, but I will shorten it. Long story short, Kota was playing footsie with me all first period in the computer lab, and we talked some more. He is dynamite hot, good conversationalist, moderate intelligence, makes me have a little internal earthquake when he even slightly touches me. I'm not a shaker, but Kota kind of makes me lose my shit and all my dignity. Is that weird? Yikes. I get so weird around guys I like. I'm thinking the whole time I'm with him, 'Don't be weird, be cool, don't be weird, be cool, don't be weird, be cool.'

3. My legs are so hairy. Thank god I wore pants today.

4. Am I growing up? Having real-world interactions with the opposite sex?

5. No, I still talk to my cat and my mom about my problems. Also, I am hostile and nervous around adults. In conclusion, I am sooo nottttt growing up. If anything, I'm growing in. To my age. How sad.

6. I am smart, because I love flamingos.

7. Madisen called me a flamingo today, then a giraffe. I was happy.

8. I feel like I have to poop, but I think it may be a cramp. I wish it would go away so I can masturbate in peace. Jeez Louise.

9. I have a history test on Thursday!!!!! STUDY!

10. Every Wednesday at my school, classes start an hour later. It's called late-Wednesday. Much like my period.

9:44pm
Update: still cramping, not wanking. Christ. But, I did roll outta bed and slide into the kitchen for a sandwich wrap. Bitches love sandwich wraps. Yum. Cheese makes the world go round.

11. People at school think I'm some kinda secret slut, and I am okay with that. Hell yeah I am!!!

12. All the virgins say hey Carla.
Me: Hey Carlaaaaaa

13. bitchez be up in da club all up on my man liek gtfo him he is my bish not urs ho

(ghetto phrase of the day)

14. Does some music turn me on? Oh yes.

15. It's herbal bro just try it. I think about my life, oh my god. I've done "drugs."

Don't panic, it's organic.

15.5. My cat is having a nightmare and doing little wheeze, growls in her sleep. Poor lil cutie.

16. When mom asks me something I don't want to answer: At least I'm not having sex.

Mom: Hayven, why did you lick that? That is disgusting.

Me: At least I'm not having sex.

Mom: That's a good enough answer for me!

Oh mum I love you

17. Can I just say finger banging? FINGER BANGING sounds dirtier than sex, to be honest.

17.5. Ouch, this paper cut is deep than your man's dick.

18. When Christian kids at school try to push their beliefs on me. Peace out, I'm Buddhist-agnostic, and I like my peaches arranged just the way they are. Go fuck a bitch then put your purity ring back on ✌️

You don't have to be religious to have morals.