Sweet Neighbor; cth

25//Drunk People Say Sober Thoughts

((A/N- i lowkey cried while making this chapter lmao. the song for this chapter is I Won't Let You Go by Sarah Thiele))

-Hayley

"Calum, stop it!"

"Why? You're just going to leave me, Hayley! So do it! Go pack your bags!"

We stand in the middle of Calum's living room. It's 2 in the morning, Calum is drunk off his ass and Ashton called me over because Calum wanted me. He won't listen to anyone until he sees me. So, here I am.

"I'm not leaving you, Calum, how many times do I have to tell you! If I wanted to, I would've done it by now."I sigh and take my boyfriend's hand and drag him to the couch.

Duke comes padding in, tiredly, and turns his head at me. I smile at the small dog and pet his head. He rubs his head into my palm and hops onto the opposite end of the couch and curls into a ball.

"Well, you should. I'm selfish and holding you back from going to one of the greatest schools in America, a-and you could be going and being successful if it wasn't for me. I'm the reason you're staying back and it's selfish of me to let you stay here. You need to go-!"he stops and I notice he has tears in his eyes.

My heart is in my throat and my knees are weak.

"Hayley, I love you but l-later today, you need to take that plane and leave. But I don't want you to-"

"C-Calum, you're drunk. Shut up."I spit out and grab his wrist, dragging him up the stairs with me.

"I'm s-sober enough to know what I'm saying, Hayes."he slurs out and follows me into his room. I sit him down on his bed and walk towards his closet. I grab a random shirt and his sweatpants off of the floor.

"Take your pants off."I demand. He giggles and begins to unzip them. "Okay, baby, whatever you say."he slurs out and slides out of his black jeans.

"Put these on."I say and toss the sweatpants and shirt at him. He nods and does what I tell him. He struggles with his shirt and groans. "Hayleyyy, can you help meeee?"he whines. I roll my eyes and pull the black shirt off of the far from sober boyfriend of mine.

I help Calum put his shirt on before making him lay down in the bed and turn on the light. "I'll be right back."I mumble and walk to his bathroom, grabbing some Asprin and a water bottle from his mini fridge in his room and setting them down on the nightstand beside his bed.

He lies there, probably knocked out and too tired to notice my presence in the room.

This might be the last time you see Calum, you need to be at the airport in 7 hours.

I sigh sadly.

I don't want to go...

I turn on my heel and begin walking out when I hear Calum mumbling something. I turn around and see him poking his head up and wide awake.

"Hayley?"

"Yes, Calum?"

"Sleep with me, please?"he begs. I nod with a small smile and get into the bed with him. He immediately wraps his strong arms around my small frame and tucks his head into my neck.

"I love you and I, uh, need you to leave, but I shouldn't be saying this... b-because I'm selfish and I want you to stay here with me."he whispers sadly into my ear and kisses my cheek.

Tears brim my eyes.

"Just um... L-leave me in the morning, while I'm asleep, a-and go to the airport with your parents and g-go be successful, for me."he tells me in a hushed tone. I keep my mouth shut as a tear slides down my cheek.

"I loooove you, Hayley. Okay? Mkay."he murmurs and kisses my cheek softly again before setting his head in the pillow beside me and keeping both arms around me.

He's drunk. He doesn't mean it.

Drunk people say sober thoughts.

I quickly wipe my eyes and turn around and wrap my arms around Calum. He smiles like a little kid and falls fast to sleep.

I rest my head against his chest, feeling more tears stream down my reddened cheeks.

This. Right here. This man right here, this curly headed, childish, mood swinging, playful, smart, amazing, loving man. He's telling me to go.

He knew.

He knew, sober, he couldn't tell me to go so he got drunk off his ass to do it. When he's this drunk, he can barely feel anything- emotionally and physically. So, knowing it would hurt him if he was fully sober, he went and made himself get drunk as can be so he wouldn't hurt as much.

Another tear slides down my cheek as a small sob falls from my lips. My wet tears side down onto his shirt yet he stays asleep.

I look up at him and press a small kiss to his jawline. "I love you, Calum."

I know he can't hear me, but I need to tell him. For me, I guess.

It'll probably be the last time I get to say it to his face, in his arms.

—————————————————

A/N- okay, uhm.

that was sad.

expect more sadness :D

-Jenna💕