Living In My Head (Drarry)

By deathbyinsomnia

227K 9.3K 6.3K

An AU story where all things began under different circumstances. There is no magic, no ministry, only The Ac... More

Chapter 0: Disclaimer/Author's Note
Chapter 1: Leaving the Dursleys
Chapter 2: 9 and 3-Quarters
Chapter 3: Piercing, Silver Eyes
Chapter 4: I'm A Klutz
Chapter 5: Late to Class
Chapter 6: Sold My Soul
Chapter 7: The (Almost) Fight
Chapter 8: Friend or Foe
Chapter 9: Dinner is Served
Chapter 10: Hard to Explain
Chapter 11: Here's the Truth (Part 1 of 2)
Chapter 12: Here's the Truth (Part 2 of 2)
Chapter 13: Bedridden and Alone
Chapter 14: Only In Dreams
Chapter 15: Released From Prison
Chapter 16: An Ulterior Motive
Chapter 17: Hit and Miss
Chapter 18: Losing My Mind
Chapter 19: Skipping Astronomy Class
Chapter 20: A Generous Invitation
Chapter 22: Taking It Easy
Chapter 23: For the Asking
Chapter 24: The Falling Snow
Chapter 25: Making Proper Arrangements
Chapter 26: You're Hiding Something
Chapter 27: The "Shopping Spree"
Chapter 28: The First Goodnights
Chapter 29: O' Departed Joys
Chapter 30: Bring Your Worst
Chapter 31: Playing the Game
Chapter 32: Actions I Regret
Chapter 33: Recounting Old Memories
Chapter 34: I Can Imagine
Chapter 35: Skipping the Pleasantries
Chapter 36: For My Own
Chapter 37: A Modest Proposal
Chapter 38: The Morning After
Chapter 39: The First Date (Part 1 of 2)
Chapter 40: The First Date (Part 2 of 2)
Chapter 41: Draco's Weakened Defenses
Chapter 42: When Choosing Truths
Chapter 43: I Miss Him
Chapter 44: More than Comfort
Chapter 45: Mister Dorian Gray
Chapter 46: End of Chimes
Chapter 47: Waiting for Answers
Chapter 48: I'm Moving On
Chapter 49: Not Officially, No
Chapter 50: Something So Small
Chapter 51: The Night Bus
Chapter 52: The Freezing Chill
Chapter 53: Feeling So Helpless
Chapter 54: Forgiven, Not Forgotten
Chapter 55: The Photo Album
Chapter 56: Long Story, Short
Chapter 57: Weight of Gravity
Chapter 58: Dynamics in Misunderstanding
Chapter 59: Spoken Through Touch
Chapter 60: Sense of Intimacy
Valentine's Interlude
Chapter 61: Illusion of Perfection
Chapter 62: The Final Countdown
Chapter 63: A Phantom Limb
Chapter 64: Release Memory's Hold
Draco POV 1 (chap 62-64)
Author's Note
Chapter 65: Points of Interest
Chapter 66: Breathe, Little Deer
Chapter 67: Dealing with "Things"
Chapter 68: Dreams One Has
Chapter 69: All Doubts Aside
Draco POV 2 (chap 66-69)
Chapter 70: As Time Passes
Chapter 71: Out of Practice
Chapter 72: Griffindor Pride
Chapter 73: The Double Date
Chapter 74: Before the Storm
Chapter 75: The Yule Ball
Epilogue
The Complete Track List

Chapter 21: A Big Decision

3.3K 151 140
By deathbyinsomnia

Chapter Song: Walls by Me vs Gravity

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I said a quick goodbye, going to class a little early. I feel that familiar scratching and I felt his voice whisper to me. I tried blocking out the noise but he eventually got loud enough that I could hear.

So, you and Draco, huh?

Nah, no way. We're friends.

I wish I had a friend who looked at me like that.

Wow, way to make our relationship awkward, Riddle.

Speaking of relationships, you are aware you woke up spooning the guy?

Wow. We were, weren't we. Huh.

Keep your thoughts pg-13, there's kids here.

All of them are my age, most of them with more "experience" than me.

Now who's fault is that?

That's it. Go in the dark corner of my mind and stay there.

Go visit Snape while you're out. Tell him where you're going.

Now why would I do that?

He's the closest thing you have to family right now.

Okay. I'll go. Now go away.

...

The itch slowly faded as I knocked on the door of Snape's quarters. My knock was uncharacteristically soft, surprising me when Snape opened the door just after a few seconds. Lupin was standing inside, leaning against a wall, looking with admiration at my mother's photo. I felt my knees buckle and my fists clenched, turning my knuckles white.

"Oh, hello Harry. Glad to see you're out of the... infirmary." Lupin said with a tight voice, glancing up at him suspiciously.

"Mr. Potter, please come in." Severus said with caution, "We three need to have a talk."

"It's about where you live outside of school." Lupin said bluntly, setting down the photo. "Lily and James had... conflicting views on who you would live with after the Dursleys sent you here."

"Sent me? Meaning I always had the option?"

"Well, actually-"

Suddenly, a phone rang, Lupin took out the phone from his pocket and listened to the voice on the other line silently and hung up, putting the phone back.

"It's the headmaster. He wants to speak to the four of us."

"Four?" I asked, hoping for explanation, one I never got.

"You'll see, Harry. Just keep your head." Severus whispered as they all walked to the office of a Dr. A. P. W. B. Dumbledore.

Lupin opened the door and I saw a man with shaggy hair, tattoos, and a weak grin. I recognized him immediately and raised my fist, about to punch him. Lupin caught my hand, tsking at me.

"So you know?"

"Of course I know!" I screamed, an older man rising from behind his desk.

He had bright eyes that did not match his upset expression. He walked over to me, put a hand on my shoulder, and directed us all to a row of seats in front of his desk. We all sat, I sat on the end by Snape, then Lupin, then the other man who scratched the tip of his moustache awkwardly.

"First off," the older man, Dumbledore's, voice was coaxing and calming. "Harry, how did you find out?"

"The memory was repressed but Neville showed me the files. Hermione knows too but for an entirely different reason."

"Ah, I had a feeling this would happen eventually." Dumbledore sighed, "How is your memory?"

"Crystal clear. I have a photographic memory."

"Then you remember these three gentlemen?"

"I know Severus, I mean Professor Snape; I only know these other two helped kill my parents."

"Harry..." the man on the edge said painfully, looking like a kicked dog. I recalled his name to be Sirius Black.

"They did not kill Lily or James, Harry. I know these boys. I knew your parents. I knew Tom Riddle, he is the only one to blame for your parents' deaths."

"Then they weren't his followers?" I asked, completely ignoring the three as they watched me closely.

"No, Harry. They were falsely accused."

"Can we please get back to the point, Albus?" Sirius asked flatly.

"Harry. Your parents had a kind of disagreement over who would take over you once you cut ties with the Dursleys to go here."

"Meaning?"

"You have to pick one of these three to be your legal guardian until-"

"Severus. I pick Severus." I interrupt him, an edge to my voice.

"Are you sure? Make sure you think this through..." Dumbledore warned and I shook my head.

"I trust Severus. He saved my life."

"Then so be it, I'll send for the paperwork." the old man stood again, smoothing out his suit and his thinned, grey hair.

I looked over at Severus who looked both surprised and touched, then at the two men who seemed hurt. I looked back to Snape and he nodded with a comment about letting us have some time alone before leaving the room after the Headmaster.

...

"You look just like him, you know. Except for Lily's eyes, you have her eyes." Sirius said with a wobbly smile.

"But your compassion is like your mother's and your goddamn determination from your father." he chuckled softly.

"Why am I at this school."

"Albus loved your parents like they were his own children, when he found out what happened... he knew you would be greater than Lily and James so he made sure you got in." Lupin sunk into his chair, seeming very tired and weary.

"I was... am... your godfather. As is Moony, however, I hate to say that Severus would be the best for you. I with my drinking issues and Remus with his anger issues, we wouldn't be a good influence on you, Harry. But you will come visit me sometime, won't you, Harry?"

I nodded, "I will."

I heard the door open, Dumbledore and Severus walking in. I feel the blood pounding in my head and I feel that infernal itching again. It halfway drives me insane!

Tell them, Harry, someone needs to know about me. Harry, are you listening? GODDAMMIT HARRY TELL THEM!

"GET OUT OF MY HEAD!" I scream, my nails digging into my temples.

I feel them swarm around me and I feel faint. Snape looks at me in horror, muttering "oh not again" over and over under his breath. They try to get answers from him but the pain stops and I fall limply to the floor.

"Explain what the hell is going on, Harry!" Remus yells, agitated.

"Tom... Riddle... won't stop... talking." then, everything goes black.

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