It took us a month to get everything out of the boxes and arranged around the house. We even bought more furniture to fill up the empty spots in the house.
It's a really open house, so it looks really empty if there's not enough furniture everywhere. Luckily, Kurt has money to get whatever we want.
I put half of my hair up in a ponytail, then walk downstairs and findFrances eating her lunch with no supervision. She's on the carpet, sitting down, eating her apples.
I look around the house, making sure that everything is ready for the party.
It's a little celebration that Kurt and I put together for everything: us getting our new house, In Utero coming out and how good it's doing, and a little goodbye party for their tour that they're going to go on.
Right as I'm stressing out about where Kurt is, I hear his acoustic guitar strumming from the other room. I exhale a sigh of relief, knowing that at least he's here and he didn't just leave.
I nod, not feeling anymore stress. We have all the food and drinks out. There's not much more for us to do.
A knock on the door snaps me back to reality and I pause, thinking about whether or not to tell Kurt that people are here and tell him to come out, or if I should wait after.
I decide not to keep the guests waiting, so I go over to the door and open it up, finding numerous people standing there, but only three I know of--my brother and his wife, and Dave.
"Kaitlyn!" Krist steps in, not giving me a hug and taking in everything.
Frances begins to cry, so I rush back and grab her while calling out to everyone, "Come on in!" I pick her up and hand her an apple to eat while I introduce myself.
Things would be easier if Kurt was out here, I think.
Shelli gives me a hug and offers to take Frances, so I let her, trying to not be so stressed out. I don't know how to react when I meet new people.
Dave stands beside Shelli, feeling a little awkward.
"Hi," A man says to me. He has long, curly, think brown hair. I also notice that his skin is very soft. "I'm Eddie Vedder. You're Kurt's wife, right?" He holds his hand out for me to shake.
I reluctantly shake it, still having no idea who he is. "No, I'm his fiancée. Who are you?"
He furrows his eyebrows at me, lowering his hand from mine and looking shocked. But then, he softens and begins to laugh. "Ha, that's funny. I see what you're doing."
I'm still confused, but luckily Krist comes by my side. "Kaitlyn, this is Eddie Vedder from Pearl Jam."
"Is that a band?" I ask him.
"Jesus Christ!" Eddie breaks into a fit of laughter. "You're funny. Gotta love a funny woman. Where's Kurt at?"
"Playing his guitar," I respond and then look at the man behind Eddie. He's bald and short.
"I'm Michael Stipe," He reaches out his hand for me to shake, so I do. "Judging based off of your conversation with him, I'm guessing you don't know who I am either. I'm the lead singer of R.E.M." After silence comes over us, he lightly chuckles. "Yeah, I'm guessing you don't know what that is either."
I shake my head. "No. Sorry." I feel awkward, being the host of the party and not knowing any guests. "I'm going to go get Kurt; I'll be right back."
I walk into the music room and see Kurt sitting on the ground, smoking a cigarette with his acoustic guitar in his lap. As good as this room is for Kurt, I feel as if he spends all of his time in here now.
"Kurt," I clear my throat. "There's people here and I have no idea who they are and you're supposed to be out here helping me with this and you're not."
He sets his guitar in his stand and puts out his cigarette, leaving it in the ashtray. "You could've just asked me to come out."
"Yeah, but I shouldn't have to," I say angrily. "You're supposed to be out here with me."
"Sorry," He says. "Ready to go?"
I nod and we go out together and as soon as he sees Michael, he starts a conversation with him. Eddie soon joins in, not wanting to feel left out.
"That was so embarrassing," I say, walking up to Krist and noticing Shelli playing with Frances. "I can't believe I didn't know them. And that Eddie guy thought I was joking!"
Krist laughs. "You're fine, Kaitlyn. If anything, it was probably refreshing for him to not meet someone who's all over him because of his fame."
The door knocks once more and I look over at Kurt to see if he's going to get it, but he stands still in his conversation. I go over to the door and open it up to find Liza there with her two girls and Remmy.
"Sorry," She says to me, talking about her kids. "I couldn't find a babysitter for them. Is it alright if they're here?"
"Yeah, of course. Just make sure they don't break anything." I shut the door behind them.
Liza gasps. "You did such a fucking good job oh my God! I mean, you guys decorated everything so well. It looks so good."
"Thank you," I smile and she hugs me.
"We need to see each other more," She stares at me in the eyes. "It isn't a want; it's a need."
"Can we go play outside?" Emma, the younger daughter, asks.
Liza looks at me. "Is that alright?"
"I don't mind, as long as they don't break anything."
"Yay!" Aubrey squeals and grabs her sister's hand, then they go out to the backyard.
"Nice to see you again," Remmy tells me, speaking up for the first time during this whole party.
"Nice to see you again, too," I grin.
"Where's the baby?" Liza asks. I point to Frances on the ground in the living room next to Shelli. Liza immediately runs over there, Remmy right behind her.
I go into the kitchen and grab a cup, filling it up with water. I walk past Kurt and smile at him, but he stops me.
"What?" I ask him, feeling bad that his attention is on me and not his friends.
"Did you meet my friends?" He asks, gesturing towards them.
I look over at them and awkwardly smile. Eddie begins to laugh harshly again.
"Yeah," I murmur.
"Did I miss something?" Kurt asks.
"Your fiancée's not a fan," Eddie says, but I know he's joking.
"She just doesn't pay attention," Kurt attempts to make the situation seem better, but in reality, he just makes it worse. "Wait--"
"You're fine," I quickly assure him and notice that his lips are pale. He hasn't been drinking water. "Hey, drink some water."
He grabs my cup and takes a sip from it, then rests it on the counter. "Guys, this is Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn, this is Michael and Eddie. Michael is also Frances' godfather."
I smile. "That's cool."
The doorbell rings and I walk away, opening it up and finding my mom standing there. She screams as she sees me and wraps her arms around me in a tight hug.
"I have not seen you since you lived in the apartment!" She plants a kiss on my forehead. "The house is just gorgeous. Isn't it gorgeous?"
"It is," I agree, stepping to the side and allowing her in. I shut the door and then she takes in the house.
She gasps. "This is just so beautiful. There's windows everywhere."
"It's really nice," I say. "Our room is huge, too."
She hugs me once more. "I am so proud of you, Kaitlyn. I really am. Where's Kurt at? I have to congratulate him, too."
I point over to him and she walks over, giving him a hug and congratulating him.
"None of this would've happened if it wasn't for him," I say, making sure that Kurt knows his worth.
"What are you talking about?" My mom shoots me a look.
"He pays for it, Mom. I don't have a job."
"Well..." Kurt says. "That's not entirely true."
I grin at him, knowing what he's hinting at. Krist then notices my mom and he walks over, giving her a hug. Everyone else begins to make their way into the kitchen to grab drinks.
"Do you think this is a good time to tell them?" I whisper in Kurt's ear. It was his idea to tell everyone the news after I told him.
"I mean, if you want," He tells me.
I groan. "Thanks for the help, Kurt."
"Wait, what do you mean that's not entirely true?" My mom rests a hand on my shoulder, dying to know what Kurt was talking about.
"I applied for a job and I got it," I announce to everyone. Surprisingly they were all paying attention and cheer for me.
"What job?" Krist asks me.
"I'm going to be a teacher's assistant" I explain. "Since you guys are going on tour, I don't want to be cooped up in the house doing nothing, so I'm going to be an assistant to the teacher."
"Don't students already do that?" Liza asks.
"In high school, yeah. But I'm going to be doing it for elementary kids. And if the teacher is ever absent, I'll be the teacher for the day."
"Yay!" My mom hugs me once more, pulling me into a deep hug. "I know it doesn't pay a lot, but at least it's something."
I roll my eyes. "Thanks, Mom."
"How long are you guys going to be going on tour for?" Liza asks Kurt.
"Until the end of the year," Dave replies.
I pout my lip just thinking about it and bringing my head down, staring at the ground. Kurt invited me to go on tour, but I had already applied for the job before he brought it up.
I don't like to think about him being gone for the rest of the year, especially for Christmas and my birthday. We haven't been away from each other for that long in a while, so it's going to be really hard on me.
Kurt tries to assure me that it's only three months and it'll go by really quickly, but I know that's not true. It'll go by quick for him since he's going to be doing stuff on tour, but I'm going to be stuck at the house doing nothing. I won't even be able to have Frances.
I wipe the thought from my mind and look up, noticing that everyone is talking amongst themselves, but Kurt is staring at me.
When we make eye contact, he furrows his eyebrows and mouths, What's wrong?
I wave my hand away, trying not to think about it, but the more that I try not to, the more that I actually do.
Tears begin to spring from my eyes, so I walk away and go out into the backyard. The two girls giggle at each other as they run from one another.
"Hi, Auntie Kaitlyn!" They both say in unison and continue to run, acting like I'm not here. They began to call me auntie after the second time they came over to my apartment--Liza didn't even have to tell them to.
The door opens and I turn to see Kurt walking out. He opens his mouth to speak, but then hears the girls scream and looks confused. He walks further out and finally sees them.
"Hey, can you girls go inside for a little please?" He kindly asks them. "Kaitlyn and I need some privacy."
Aubrey looks at Emma. "I'm going to beat you." She gets a headstart and runs inside, Emma slowly following behind her.
Kurt shuts the door and I step forward a little, not feeling in the mood to talk right now.
"K," He softly says. "What's going on?"
I scoff. "You're smart, Kurt. What do you think is going on? What were we just talking about?" I clasp my hands over my mouth, feeling like shit for talking to him that way. He didn't do anything; he's just trying to help me and I'm treating him like this. Tears fall from my eyes. "I'm sorry I'm being such a cunt. I'm about to start my period and you know how I get--"
He softly chuckles. "I know, I know. You don't have to apologize."
I rub my eyes, trying to stop myself from shedding more tears, but I can't stop thinking about Kurt leaving. "We just got this house and now you're fucking leaving."
"I offered for you to go--"
"You know I can't, Kurt," I say. "I just got a job; I can't do that."
"You're just the assisstant. And it'll only be for three months."
"I can't, Kurt," I sternly say. "There's no going around it. I just can't go."
He sighs and rubs his forehead. "I don't know how to help you, Kaitlyn."
"You don't have to help me. I'm allowed to be upset and you not help me. There's no helping me. I'm just sad and that's fine."
"I hate seeing you sad."
"Well you better get used to it because I'm sad a lot," I sarcastically say and rub my eyes, but it doesn't stop the tears.
"There's something else that's bothering you, Kaitlyn, and you're not telling me."
It amazes me how he notices these small things about me. Whenever I think that he doesn't, he always proves me wrong.
"That's because I don't want to talk about it," I say and glance over inside. When I look through the window, I see everyone staring out and looking at us. "I hate this fucking house! There's so many windows everywhere and now they're fucking staring at us! We don't have one bit of privacy, Kurt!"
He looks over at the window and everyone immediately looks away. He sighs and goes inside, slamming the curtains over the windows, then walks back outside.
"There. Now will you tell me?" He breathes heavily. "You can't keep secrets, K. We're supposed to be in this together, okay?"
I roll my eyes. "You're going to think I'm stupid for this."
"You know I won't."
I look up into his eyes, trying to find a reason to trust him right now that he won't put me down. But then I remember that it's Kurt and he would never do that.
He's right. I know he won't.
"I don't know why I've been thinking about this lately," I whisper, fidgeting with my hands, my lip trembling as I speak. "But I've been thinking about my father and I'm scared that he's going to find me again."
Kurt's expression softens and he brings me in for a hug, rubbing my back. He doesn't say anything. He just lets me cry against him.
"I can't do one thing right," I cry. "This was supposed to be a fun party and--"
"Shush," He says. "Don't think about that right now."
I close my eyes and imagine a world with just Kurt and I. Where no other troubles consume us. Where he doesn't have to leave on tour for the rest of the year--or, according to him, three months. Where I don't have to live in fear everyday that my own father will find where I live.
The back door opens and Krist emerges from it.
"What's going on?" He asks.
"I have it handled," Kurt says.
"She's my sister, Kurt. I'm allowed to know what's going on."
I part myself from Kurt's hug and look at Krist. I don't want to tell him about what I'm scared about because I know that'll just freak him out more and prevent him from going on tour. As much as I don't want them to leave, I know they need to do this. And it's not fair to all those fans that spent money or them to see them to just cancel it.
"I'm just sad Kurt's leaving. That's all. I'm just really emotional."
"It'll be over before you know it," He assures me. "And who knows? Maybe Shelli could come stay with you. Or your friend Lisa."
"It's Liza," I correct him.
"Whatever. Maybe you could even go stay with her. I don't care. You have people; hang out with them. Are you ready to go back inside and enjoy yourself?"
I pause. I have to go back inside and they all know that I've been crying out here. But before I know it, Kurt's already forcing me inside and everyone is just talking amongst themselves, not paying attention to me.
Frances walks over to Kurt and I, pulling on her dad's pants, so he picks her up and kisses her cheek.
"You're a chubby baby," He says in one of his weird voices. "Yes you are. Yes you are. Say, 'Kaitlyn, no crying.' Can you say that? Can you say that?"
I shove him. "Shut the fuck up."
He gasps. "No cussing in front of the baby."
Right as I'm about to say, No drugs in front of the baby--something that would only end with an argument--I stop myself. "No smoking in front of the baby."
"Now, there's no stopping that."