Darling | KTH

-:- I'm broken -:-

( Jungkook's p.o.v )

I closed my eyes and sighed deeply, i could feel a tightness in my hearth a big pain that swallowed me alive. I felt suffocated.

My hands gripped tightly on the table i was leaning on, my arm muscles hardening with the power of my pain. I gripped tighter on it, my mind filling itself with the images of the things i had done.

Of what i had become...

A grunt left my mouth and suddenly the corners of the wooden table broke.

My eyes opened slowly and i looked at the two pieces of wood in my hands, anger flowed through me like water. Filling me up instantly, i trowed the two wooden pieces at the wall with a loud grunt.

"FUCK!!" I yelled as i let myself fall to the ground, my eyes starting to tear up. I sobbed hard when i felt them, i hated it so much. This pain crushed me and consumed me slowly.

The regret, the guilt, the desperation, the need.

I need you...

My fist came up only to hit the ground with force, my tears falling endlessly from my eyes.

"Why??" The room was silent only the sound of my sobs and my pain were heard, my heart was slowly feeling numb.

I can't take this anymore, i looked beside me to find my gun laying on the ground. The dark cold metal shined above the dim light of the room.

My hand reached further to it.

So beautifully letal.

Like you...

I stood up slowly my fists hurting and bleeding but i ignored it, physical pain was nothing for me anymore.

I put the gun inside of my jacket and exited the room, the empty and lifeless hallways of my house met me. I walked through them with dreadful steps. My eyes diverted to the last room to the left.

She was there...

With uncertainty i approached it, my heart seemed to beat faster every second, my body worked against me. A part of me the one that still had a little bit of saneness, told me to get away. To give her space and time. But my heart wanted to be there, laying beside her. Watching her dream.

Stop it, you are a freak.

I'm a freak...

I'm broken.....

When i reached the door i hesitated wether to do it or not, but again my body and my heart acted before my mind.

The light from the sun that came from the open window at the end of the room blinded me. My eyes roamed from the window to the bed, were her body was.

She's so beautiful...

No remember what you have to do!!

I closed my eyes an sighed. I should've done that last time, i shouldn't have get to attached. My mission was not to fall for her, it never was.

Even after all that happened, even if she doesn't love me....

I know you don't love me, but i still want you.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

( flashback ) *third person* ( 1 year ago )

Jungkook sighed and shook his head again "Dad how many times do i have to tell you, i'm not interested!! I don't want to work for a guy like him!!" he protested.

His father only looked at him with a sharp gaze, the veins of the old man's neck popping out of anger "I'm your boss, you do as i say!!" he said with a loud voice.

Jungkook shakes a bit at the sound of his fathers voice, but said nothing. Boss. That's all his father wanted for Jungkook to see him like, like a boss whom orders he had to follow. Instead of a caring father he once was.

"You're going to his company tomorrow, he already has a mission assigned for you" his father finished. Jungkook's fists tightened but he said nothing.

"It's that all?" he asked, his father only nodded "You're dismissed" he waved at the door and Jungkook only walked to it silently.

When he was already in his room he shut his door close. His eyes blurry with tears and blood boiling with both anger and frustration.

He trowed his gun at the very end of the room.

He didn't want to hurt people, he never wanted that. But his father....

No

His boss...

Tears fell from his eyes as he looked at the gun laying on the corner. Surprisingly beautiful and spotless, even after it left many things broken.

A lot of people broken.

Including Jungkook.

( End of flashback )

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

I was sitting on the bed, keeping certain distance from her sleeping form.

I took out the gun from the inside of my jacket. I've been through a lot with this. This was my destruction. This is why i'm here.

A lonely tear fall down my eyes as it all came back.

"j-jungkook?!"

She's awake....