Behind The Smile(Zoella)

'Bun In The Oven'

Haii! I got some time I write while I was on the plane (17 hours I travelled!) and then little bits in between times so here you go! I might have one or two more up before I get back but we'll see!
Hope you enjoy!
Much love for you all❤️
(Oh and just want to say thank you to xmissymoox for being so lovely to me, I really appreciate it) x
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I wandered out the doctors after composing myself slightly. I broke down in tears as soon as the nurse told me, I don't know whether they're happy tears or not.

Obviously,I'm delighted. I really wanted to have another child but on the other hand, I'm gutted. I'm not quite sure that,in reality, we were quite ready. Either way, we've got none months to get our shit together and make ourselves ready.

I shoved the vitamins that the nurse had prescribed into my bag and then climbed in the car. I'd decided I wasn't going to tell Joe just yet, I wanted to tell Alfie and the kids first.

"What took you so long Zoe?" Joe groaned, pointing to the time."4:15, I have to be back by 4:45 otherwise the whole night goes wrong!"

I laughed, Joe's become a man who lives for his family. He was so overwhelmed by it, he'd forgotten to ask how his own sister was. I laughed if off though, his hearts in the right place.

"Well I'll drop you back now, where are you staying?" I asked, starting up the car. Joe told me the address and quickly started up the car.

"Oh shit, I forgot to ask. How was it?" Joe asked, looking at me with sympathy in his eyes.

This was the question I was dreading, I didn't have an answer because I didn't want him to tell anyone else or get worried.

"How was what?" I mumbled, focusing intently on the road ahead. I decided to just play dumb, like I didn't know at first. Doing it his way would buy my a couple of extra seconds.

"The doctors, stupid. What did the tests say?" Joe asked, looking me up and down like I was mental.

"Oh, erm, they don't quite know yet. They're sending them away properly and they're going to give me a call when it's done.

"Typical! You were in that stupid place for nearly an hour and you still don't even know what the hell is wrong with you!" Joe exclaimed, suddenly. I jumped and had to swerve off of the road.

"Joe, don't shout. You really scared me!" I shouted, wiping tears from my eyes. "Oh come on Zoe, get your crap together!"

I began to break down in tears again in the side of the road with my brother looking down at me with a looks of confusion, sympathy and panic in his eyes.

He wrapped his arms around me and gave my arm a rub.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm fine," I sniffed, wiping my nose with my sleeve.

"What really happened at the doctors, Zoe?" Joe asked, I guess he's maybe seen through my act. I'm still sticking to my story and quickly came up with an excuse.

"Nothing, it's just.. It's just the waiting. I've been back twice and nobody knows what it is," I lied, I knew perfectly well what it was but I'm not telling him yet.

"I'm sure it's fine Zoe, don't worry about it," Joe comforted me. I nodded and gave  him a smile. I feel awful lieing to him, he's actually really trying to help me. "Here, I'll drive, at least back to our hotel," Joe offered, hopping out the car and walking around to my side.

"Thankyou," I mumbled, my guilt almost getting the best of me. I'll apologise when he knows and pay him back somehow.

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"Are you sure you're okay to drive?" Joe asked as he stood by my door.

"I'm fine man Joe, I'll text you when I'm home."

Joe nodded and shut the car door, I started the car up and drive away once I'd seen Joe was in.

He wasn't staying too far from the house so it wouldn't take to long to get back. While I was on the way back, I thought of some funny ways I could tell Alfie we were expecting.

Maybe I'd drop some clues or something over the next couple of days and see if he could work it out. I want to have some fun with it...

I opened the door to see the kids and Alfie standing in the kitchen. Alfie walked out to greet me and picked me up and spam me around, planting a sweet kiss on my lips before dropping me.

"What's that for?" I giggled, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He just smiled and kissed me again.

"Nothing like, hello Alfie," He chuckled, leading me through to the dining room. The kids had somehow scuttled through to the table and were sitting down to their seats all by themselves.

I smiled and quickly ran to greet them and give them a kiss.

I sat down on the other side to the kids and Alfie came in setting down a plate filled with mash potato, sausages and beans. I giggled at the plate of food he set in front of me and thanked him.

"What's this for?" I asked, again. "It all looks lovely, thankyou, but what's the occasion?"

"Joe texted from the car, we wanted to cheer you up," Alfie whispered.

I pulled an 'oh right' face and then began eating. I giggled as the kids tried to feed each other (?) and then babbled on to us about some chicken or whatever.

Alfie took the plates away and came back grinning.

"Ready for dessert?" Alfie asked.

"Oh, have you got a bun in the oven?" I smirked at my own comment.

Alfie stood their shaking his head, obviously clueless to my remark.

"No but I've got brownies," Alfie smiled.

I nodded my head and then chuckled away to myself about what I'd just said.  The kids looked me up and down and shrugged.

They must think I'm going mad...