Quirk Of Fate

50-Remorse

A feeling of regret or sadness.

Flapping her eye lids momentarily for the hundredth time, she stared at the two lines gawking back at her with no excuse. No, this shouldn't be happening, it can't be. She removed another clean shit again to pee on it not believing the result it was giving her but, hell no. She was pregnant.

Her palms brought to her mouth trying to avoid the sobs from escaping, not now, this shouldn't be real. With her thought interlacing each other, she could think of nothing but her health. Quite flustered dropping it on the toilet sink, she didn't plan for this to happen to her. The question was how? and it still remained unanswered, she've tried as much as possible to take her pills without skipping but, why must she be pregnant, she wasn't prepared, she got a lot running on her mind to accept this.

Rushing out of the bathroom after discarding the test kit into the closet and flushing it, she banged the door behind her in a rush slipping into her fuchsia Sudanese Abaya and taking her car keys from the night stand as she rushed outside, she pressed the unlock button on her way, the moment her butts touched the car seat, she pulled the gear.

Driving out of the compound indecisive of what the consequence of her action could be, misunderstanding everything with the only word in her dictionary being her health. Not thinking twice that she was about to hurt a soul as the Honda Accord, 11th generation model pulled in front of the building, the engine off as she descend the vehicle.

" Remove it" she furiously said louder than the latter not wanting to convince herself that she can keep it.

The woman looked at her with dismay wondering why she will think of Such a thing, " what I mean..."
"...Dr Basma, don't ask me any question at the moment because I don't have an answer to it, just do as I say" Sha added interrupting the lady.

She wasn't herself to be precise making her play with her idle fingers " I meant, you could think abou..."
" Fu**...oh shit, which part of the English do you not understand" she cursed her frustration reaching it core, this was the only hospital she knew could remove the thing in her stomach with a snap of her finger and the doctor is making things harder for her, her conscious was already judging her and she wasn't ready to back down.

" Do as I say and discard it" she said again louder making the lady to nod in affirmation. She really wanted to help her out because she've encountered ladies that have been in this situation regretting it afterward

And she really was going to regret it.

Her fingers drumming on the steering with an unsteady rhythm, she've done it, She've killed her own child, she wanted to deny the occurance of everything but she couldn't, her heart pumping blood through every essential part in her body, already swollen unable to bare the visible fact, she is a murderer.

Her shaky hands typed unto the sleek surface of her phone, dialing the number of the first person that came to her mind. The number repeatedly rings but there was no response from the other end, she dialed the number again and again still landing on the same result.

Frantically bringing the engine to life as the tyres led her to the only person she could expose this to, she passed through the metal gate as the security man slide the gate for her, her patience wearing off making her alight the car the moment the engine was off, not bothering to lock the doors as she moved through the transparent door not replying anyone's greeting, she wasn't in for whatever they had to say at the moment, she just needed to see her friend.

Entering the office with shaky breaths just in time to sight Khamamat close to the coffeemaker, she needed that at the moment, even if it meant getting drunk from it which is obviously impossible. She dropped her hand bag on the table while getting sitted on the vacant chair opposite to Khamamat's chair with her eyes directly fixed on her.