Lost spirit due to lost of hope.
She shuffled through her suitcase countless times but got nothing comfy to wear, she've always been out of the mood since after the death of her husband, wanting everything to go back to how it was supposed to be but it never did.
She wished she've never accepted him to start with since it wasn't sincerely out of love, maybe...just maybe her lord was punishing her for ever thinking of that as a way out. she wanted to turn it all on khabeer claiming he pushed her to do that. She hated the look of pity he always gave her whenever he saw her, she hated the fact that he still cares after what she has done with his closet friend.
The fact that it wasn't all her fault but accepting him wasn't right considering their relationship with khabeer. She just wanted to put the blame on khabeer but couldn't, she always gave the excuse of wanting him to feel the pain she felt and wallow in jealousy of her being with his friend but he never let it get to him. He just tried once and allowed her get married to Ahmad. Different negative thoughts swaying her mind which she pushed away the moment she found the cloth she was looking for.
Her golden undertone skin already moisturized by her cream. She enshrouded herself with the peach Abaya having patterns of peach petals on it while pinning the veil to her head. The dress really worth her twenty to thirty minutes search.
Looking back at the already scattered bag, she huffed out an exaggerating breath before squatting to rearrange it again. finding out that the two people she got encountered with in the hospital were her paternal parent, they insisted she stayed with her parents after her discharge until when she was fully recovered. She wanted considering staying till when she was mentally stable which she wasn't sure would happen anytime soon, but couldn't put up with the act she was getting from her mother which made her to give in.
She dragged the suitcase down the hallway towards the living room as she sighted her mother sitting on the couch watching telenovela but she knew definitely well that her attention was not all on it. Her grandparents went over to uncle Hamza's house and would be spending the night over there, there were going to stay till when the wedding plans for their daughter is finalised which won't take place until after they heard from Haleema. She looked at her with a heavy heart dragging her box towards her direction, with a bowl of untouched popcorn and mango juice on the side table which she was sure won't be touched till the twin come back to take it from her.
" Mama I'll be going" she muttered making her raise her head adorned with swollen bloodshed eyes. With unsettling feelings crumbling her mind since when Haleema talked about her ex-husband cheating on her, different negative thoughts swaying her mind but she refused to let in believing that he would do no such thing. Trying as hard as possible to bring words out of her daughter's mouth but she refused, she thought giving her cold shoulder would make her unveil it to her but it seems like she wasn't ready to tell her.
" Safe journey" she said shortly averting her gaze from the television as she blinked a threatening tear away from her eyes. Trying as much as possible not to let it fall but it betrayed her rolling freely on her cheeks.
" Mama" she called out engulfing her in a hug.
" I know that you don't want me to get hurt but holding this is making it worst Haleema" she sniffled disentangling them from each other as she rested her hand on her shoulder.
" I'm sorry but I don't want you to get married to him, I don't want you getting hurt again" she mumbled backing away as she stood on her feet hardening her heart not to let words out. She knew she must unveil what she was holding sooner enough knowing how persisting her grandparents could be within the days she spent in the hospital.
" Okay" her mother mumbled wiping away her tears as she shifted her gaze back to the show she was watching, her mind wasn't still at rest and it would never be until her daughter decides to speak out
" Shaheeda would be coming over during the weekend" she added nibbling on the popcorn absentmindedly.
" Okay, take care" Haleema muttered with a heavy heart perceiving the way her relationship was fading with her mother.
Her heart filled with worries of having a failed relationship with her mother, she walked out of the house with dried eyes. She wanted the happiness of her mother but as much as she knew that her father did not inform her mother of his hidden marriage and child, she wasn't ready to unmask that and see her mother wallow in pain, she would do just anything in her power to make sure her mother remains happy.
Looking at herself at the wing mirror, she saw a sulky reflection of herself with cheekbones and sullen eyes. This was harder than she thought it would, it was harder than everything, harder than her first breakup, harder than her breakup with khabeer and harder than getting married to someone and never getting to see him alive in their matrimonial home.
She could no longer save herself from the vicious circle of worrying about what she can and what she cannot do. She forsake the peaceful life she once had with her mother for her protection, knowing surely well that her father was no more the man she used to know. She don't know if it was okay for her to believe in an outsider's words but she sense truth in her words. She realised she have been ungrateful for she asked her lord to bring her father back and still complained when it was answered, she hated the fact that she is inbetween a chronic and an amateur complainer towards her lord. She wanted to be contented with what she has but couldn't.
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Quirk Of Fate
General FictionDisquiet can only be extinguished when there is forlorn hope. In a world where two people were destined to be,the scars and wound leaving a huge impact, the mistakes made by them bringing them closer to each other. But one thing was that...... ...
