chapter 55.

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*i completely rewrote this chapter because I didn't like what I'd originally written and the direction I went it - just to clear up any confusion.

"I don't get it," I groan, throwing my head into my hands.
I'm currently on FaceTime with Addy as we're both trying to figure out our Math homework, only I'm not figuring it out at all. I literally can not think straight.

My stomach is growling at me and my mind is as clear as the fog you see in graveyards during those scary movies. It's only a couple of hours until dinner though, so I may as well just hold out a little longer.

"I don't get it either," Addy sighs, sitting back in her chair. "Go get your Dad, didn't he go to Harvard or something?" She giggles. "He's not home, otherwise I would," I explain.

"Damn," she pouts. "I'm gonna move onto English then."
"Yeah, me too then. I'm so behind it that already," I say. "I was too, but I finally finished that essay that's due tomorrow," she chuckles, looking through her school bag.

"We have an essay due tomorrow?" I ask, the tears already threatening to fall. "Yeah...why?" She questions hesitantly, looking back up at the camera. "I didn't know that!"
"You haven't started it?"
"Obviously not! How many words is it?"

"Oh my god," I groan, slamming my head down on my desk as the tears start to roll down my cheeks.

"Do you want some help?" My girlfriend asks gently. I don't answer because I hate letting her see me cry. Not because I don't feel comfortable crying around her, but because I feel like I'm burdening her with my emotional instability.

"It's alright," I sniff, my head still resting on my desk. "Honey, are crying?" She asks, her voice soft. "I'm sorry," I mumble, "I'm such a mess at the moment."

"No, don't apologise, you idiot," she tells me as I hear her begin to move about, so I look up and wipe my tears.

"What are you doing?"
"I'm coming over," she explains. "You don't have to do that, Add's. I'll be alright," I say.
"I know, but I wanna give you a cuddle," she smiles, making her way downstairs with her laptop and keys. Well, I'm not gonna argue that, am I?
"I'll be there in like, twenty minutes."
I smile, "thank you."
She kisses the camera.

"I love you. I'll see you soon," she says. "I love you too. Bye."

I stare at my wall for the first few seconds after hanging up the phone before I'm interrupted by the sound of my stomach growling.
I sigh as my gaze drops to the uneaten muffin behind my pencil case.

When I pick it up and break off a piece, I decide that I can just not eat as much when it comes time for dinner. However, the moment I start chewing, I reach for a tissue and spit it out.

It's like my brain started calculating all the reasons I I shouldn't eat it, faster than I could keep up. So, instead I opt to go downstairs and find something healthier.

"Mom!" I yell, coming downstairs. "What?" She yells back. "I'm dropping out of school!"

Going into the kitchen, I open the fridge to hopefully find fruit of some sort. "Why are you dropping out of school?" Mom chuckles, coming up behind me. "I have an essay due tomorrow that I only just realised I had, and it's two-thousand words," I explain, reaching for the packet of blueberries.

"Oh how fun," she jokes, "do you need help?"
"It's alright, Addy's on her way over and we're gonna do it together. Thank you though," I smile lightly.

"Okay," she returns the smile. "How are you two going?"

"We're really good," I admit, my cheeks turning a shade of red. I still get just as many butterflies now as I did when I first realised how much Addy meant to me. She's been nothing but amazing and I don't even think I can begin to explain how grateful I am for her.

"I actually have a question, but you have to promise not to make it awkward," I add.

"I don't make promises I can't keep," she quirks an eyebrow.

"Fine. I'll ask someone else."

"Wait, no. I promise I'll try my best not to make it awkward," she laughs.

I take a deep breath and nod. "I...Addy and I haven't...well, I'm do you tell know."

"Okay, if anyone made it awkward, it was you," Mom teases, giggling. "Shut up," I groan.

"Are you asking me how to tell someone you're ready to have sex?"

"Do you really have to be so blunt about it?"

"Yes," she says.

I roll my eyes before agreeing. "Is it weird? That we haven't yet?" I question genuinely. "No, not all. You're both only sixteen, and yes you've been together for a year but it's a huge step, especially in your first relationship. I think it's a good thing that you've taken your time," she explains.

"Now, to answer your question. You have to make it clear, you can't sort of hint at it. But if she's not ready, and she might not be, you have to be patient. Alright?"

"Okay," I nod, "thank you."

She smiles before walking behind the counter to give me a hug. "You're growing up too fast now, Lex," she pouts, squeezing me tightly.
"I love you," I mumble. "I love you too, sweetheart."

"You just have to promise me that you'll never, ever, ever do it whilst your family is home. These walls aren't soundproof," she warns.

"My bedroom is right next to yours, I unfortunately figured that out a while ago," I sigh, pursing my lips together.

"You sound have soundproof headphones?"

"Thank god."

I take my packet of blueberries and make my way to the front door after a knock is heard.
My girlfriend immediately throws herself into my arms once I swing open the door.

"I don't like seeing you cry," she mumbles, her voice muffled by my shirt. "Aw Addy," I giggle, holding her tightly, "I'm okay now, I was just having a moment."

I pull away from the hug and place a reassuring kiss on her lips. "Eww," Rose complains, to which I flip her off. "Lexie, really?" Mom says, coming to the door. "Sorry Rose," I apologise to my sister.

"Hi Addy," Mom greets her with a smile. "Hi," my girlfriend smiles back. "Uh, what about me?" Rose sasses, her mouth hanging open.

"Hi Rosie," Addy giggles, ruffling her hair.

When we get upstairs, I close the door behind me, put the blueberries down at my desk and jump onto my bed beside Addy. "Cuddles!" She enthuses, pulling me on top of her and wrapping my arms around my waist.

Hiii, how's life?

For your comfort, Lexie and Addy are gonna stay together (at least that's my plan)

But, would you be mad if at some point there was some drama between them?

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