My Old, New Friends (English)

58.

Lotte pov.

I open the door of the basement. I sigh and grab a blanket and lie on the couch. I lay down the pillow and close my eyes. I sigh and wipe a few tears. ,,Here you are. I hear after a while and see calum come in in a pair of sports shorts. I look out in front of me and feel him sit next to me. "I just don't want to lose you. he says sighing. "Yeah, then you're doing it right. I say when I look at him angrily. ,,I love you. he says and I look away again. I wipe my eyes again. "I don't feel it very much. I say to him. He sighs. ,,why are you here. I ask him. "Because you weren't in bed. He says. "Do you really think I'll be happy to lie next to you if you ask me something like that? I say to him. He looks at me. I really don't have the energy for this anymore. I say with a sigh. ,,in what. He asks and I look at him. ,,This, all the time, arguing, discussions, I just don't want it anymore. I say to him and look at him. "You don't want us anymore. he asks softly. ,,I want us, but without those fights. I don't think there can be an us. I say. He nods. ,,I do not want to lose you. He says broken now too. "I'm your best friend's sister. I have not disappeared from the face of the earth. I say and chuckle between the tears. ,,You are special lotte, special to me. i want you in my life. He says as he takes my hand. "then don't keep pushing me away. Accept me, my friends, my choices. I say softly. "I only have you guys left. I don't want to lose you. I say softly and start crying again. I feel his arms around me. He pulls me onto his lap and holds me tight. "You haven't lost us. He says. "I'm just scared, calum. I say on his neck. ,,Why. He asks. ,,All this, that attention, everyone sees what I do, no privacy anymore. I get so much hate. I say and I feel him nod. ,,I don't want to go back into that hole, I just got out, but I don't think I can do it. I tell him and he slowly lets go of me. "Lotte, you can always call us and stuff. He says. ,,I don't want that, you have your own life. I say to him. I sit between his legs and my legs are around him. He looks at me. "I'm going tomorrow. I say softly. "Tomorrow already. He asks and I nod. "Would you like to get back in bed? he asks after a while. "If you say sorry. I say and look at him. ,,never. he says and smiles at me. ,,Okay. I say and start to tickle him. He falls on his back and I sit up straight. ,,lotte stop. he shouts laughing. ,,no. I say smiling. After a while I stop and sit up again. Calum looks at me and turns around and we fall to the ground. His hand is on the back of my head. ,,my turn. He says and looks at me playfully. I crawl under him today and run to the door. I feel a hand on my hip and on the door. I turn around and calum is standing there looking at me. I look into his beautiful brown eyes. My hands move to his neck and I gently press my lips to his. I feel his hands on my side and he starts to tickle me. I quickly let go of calum and start laughing. ,,Stop. I shout happily. I sink to the floor on my knees and now sit against the door. ,,come here. Says calum holding out his hands. "No, you tickle me again. I say smiling and look at him. he shakes his head and he kneels. He squats in front of me now. "I'm sorry. he says and looks at me. he wipes a tuft of hair behind my ear and I grab his hand. ,,it is okay. I say as his hand rests on my cheek. "Come and lie with me again, it's so quiet without you. He says and I nod. he pulls me up and we walk back to the bedrooms. I jump into bed and get under the covers. I feel Calum's arm around me and I turn around. Our faces are millimeters apart. He places his hand on my neck and kisses my lips. ,,Goodnight Sweetheart. He says. I snuggle up to him. "Sleep well cal. I say and press another kiss on his chest.

Here we are again. On the airport. The boys had an interview so we already said goodbye at home. I sigh and Ryan puts an arm around me. "Come on, 6 more months and then you'll see them again. He says and I nod. we get on the plane and I sit down in the right seat. ,,lotte, is it okay if Steven joins us on tour. Lara asks sitting next to me. "Of course, you don't have to ask. I say smiling. She smiles at me. ,,We will have a girls night again this week. I ask her. ,,Of course, we haven't seen each other very much, or yes, privately. She says and I nod. ,,therefore. I say and look out the window. Let my eyes fall shut for a moment.