I finish the last curl in my hair, looking in the mirror at myself in my dress. If only my dress was white and I had a matching white veil clipped to my hair, the one that my mother is planning on passing down to me from my great-grandmother. I disappoint myself as I inspect the burgundy dress that covers me on this November afternoon, my curled hair and winged eyeliner being my only accessories on this dull, fall day.
I leave my apartment and get into my car, the roar of the engine waking me from my daydreams. I am in love with my best friend. I am completely, utterly in love with Sidney Crosby. He's my day and my night, my only reason for still living in my hometown of Nova Scotia. But loving him doesn't have all its pluses, it has minuses as well. Loving someone can be pure bliss, with only that person on your mind for what can feel like only a second when it actually lasts for a day. Loving someone can also be heart wrenching. Their choices may not revolve around you, or sometimes they may not even be aware of your infatuation with them, but you choose to love them anyways.
This is exactly my situation. Of course, I can't be upset about him marrying another woman when he doesn't know my feelings for him, but that isn't the case. I've confessed my love for Sidney multiple times, but I've only confused him about his future plans - those future plans happening today.
I guess my words haven't effected him as much as I wanted them too, because the ceremony hasn't been canceled. I've thought of everything that I could possibly say to him, but they won't mean as much as those three words that I've already confessed.
Although I don't want him to marry Kathy, I can't miss my best friend's wedding ceremony. We've talked about our weddings to each other when we we're younger, obviously me more than him, but we still promised each other to be there for one another.
I park my car in the parking lot of the chapel and I look myself over in my car's rearview mirror. I inhale deeply and exhale slowly, thinking about keeping myself together during this entire process. I exit the car and walk into the chapel to be greeted by Sidney and Kathy's family and friends. I smile and greet them, making small talk before walking up the stairs to go find Sidney getting ready in his room.
As I walk down the hallway, I pass Kathy's room and see a glimpse of her in her wedding gown. She looks so pretty, her tan skin complimenting the white ball gown she wears.
I catch a glimpse of Evgeni in the room a few doors down and smile at him.
"(Y/N)!" He greets me, pulling me into a hug.
"You look so good!" I compliment him, looking over his suit.
"Thank you, you too." I flash him a smile and turn to see Sidney in his tuxedo.
He stands in front of the mirror, trying to tie his bowtie. "Let me help you." I offer, walking over to him.
"You were always the best at tying these things." He looks down at my concentrated face as I pull the tie through several loops before pulling it one last time to finish it off in its final position.
"There." I straighten it and step next to Sidney, both of us looking in the mirror to see the final product. "Looks good." I crack a smile and sit down on a chair near the dresser, knowing that this will be the last time I will see him before he becomes a husband.
"(Y/N)." He sighs. In that moment, I know what he's going to bring up, so I change the subject.
"A-Are you nervous?" I squeak out through my choked back tears. He turns around from the mirror and takes a seat next to me, placing a hand on my thigh.
"Please, listen to me." He pauses. "I'm sorry, I-"
"There's no reason to be sorry, Sidney. You fell in love and you want to marry her, that's perfectly fine." A tear slips out from the corner of my eye. "I'm happy for you. Really, I am. I wish you guys the best of luck on everything, okay?" I stand up and try to discreetly wipe the tear from my cheek.
"Don't cry." He stands too, walking towards me.
"I'm not crying... They're happy tears." I laugh at myself, whether it be from my pathetic words or from the insanity that I'm feeling, I don't know. "I'll see you down there, okay?" I walk towards the door, but he keeps talking.
"So you're not mad?" I turn back.
"No, oh my gosh. I could never be mad at you, Sidney. I-I love you, Sid. Always." The waterworks come down from my eyes and I rush out of the room and into the bathroom, crying my eyes out.
How could I be so selfish? I can't just let them be happy on their one and only wedding day. Of course, I have to ruin it. I feel so awful and so rude, I don't even want to attend the ceremony or see any of Sidney or Kathy's family or friends.
Somehow I gather my thoughts and control my emotions enough for me to fix my makeup in the bathroom just in time for the ceremony. I take my seat in the back pew in the chapel and watch as family and friends pile in the room.
In a few moments, I see Sidney and his groomsmen take their places next to the priest. I try my hardest not to look at them, not to dwell on them too much. I can feel Sidney's eyes on me from across the church, almost as if he's upset with me. I wouldn't be surprised if he was. If I were him, I would be upset with me.
Before I knew it, the music begins playing and everyone stands, watching the doors that are just a few feet away from me. They open on queue to reveal a stunning bride. She walks down the aisle and I look over to Sidney. He smiles his sparkling smile that could light up any room.
The priest begins speaking and it's just about time for them to say their "I Do's". She says it, this moment becoming even more real than before. But when it's time for Sidney to say his, he hesitates.
"Sidney," The priest begins. "Do you take Kathy to be your wife?" He shortens the sentence, awaiting Sidney's response.
"No." Sidney breathes a sigh of relief in his single word, looking over to me.
I become confused and furrow my eyebrows at him, as if to say "What on earth are you doing?". He smiles at me and I can't help but smirk back at him. He releases Kathy's hands and runs down the aisle towards me.
Kathy has the same expression as the entire room, except for me.
"How much did you say you loved me?" He says, holding out his hand.
"A lot."
"Then let's go." He smirks and I take his hand, both of us running out of the chapel.
"What the hell, Crosby?" I laugh and he picks me up, spinning me around in the parking lot.
"I don't know what made me realize it at that very moment, but I love you too. A lot." He pulls me close at my waist and leans down to press his lips against mine.
~
Exactly 8 months later, Sidney and I speak our vows to one another, promising to never stop loving each other.
"You may now kiss the bride." The priest finally tells us.
We smile at each other, knowing that this was our fate all along. He leans down to kiss me and I reach up and run my fingers through his hair. Roars erupt from the pews and we laugh in the kiss, pulling away from one another to walk down the aisle and be announced as Mr. & Mrs. Sidney Crosby.
