the strongest avenger (2)

thirty nine

"I got goats." I calmly say to Tony, while rubbing Karl's back.

Tony sighs and rubs his temples as he looks between the three of us. "Did you two have anything to do with this?"

"Nope."

"No Mr Stark."

"I went to this farm to get tomatoes. And...I ended up getting goats. Now please don't yell, you're going to stress me out more and scare the kids." I continue to rub their backs.

"I—why goats?" His hands are thrown up is exasperation.

"I debated a chicken, but figured that they're too loud. And then the pigs smelt bad, and a cow is too big. So, now we have goats."

"Jesus Tal..." He groans. "You need to return them."

I gasp and turn to Tony. "Absolutely not. They're my kids."

"You were literally just freaking out about the responsibility of these kids."

"Shut it Pete." I hold my hands over Karl's ears. "We cannot give them back. They would be devastated, dude."

"Don't dude me, Talia James."

"You just got full-named." James leans in and whispers.

"I think we'll have fun. See," I turn to James. "I told you that I'm fun. This is good for bonding and team moral. We kinda need that around here."

"Yeah, so we could do laser tag or some shit that kids do these days. Not go and buy animals!"

"Please, stop yelling at me. My blood pressure is probably abnormally high right now, and I don't want to take a Xanax because then I'll fall asleep, and I have to take care of the kids."

"They're not kids, they're goats."

"Baby goats are called kids, sir." Peter chimes in.

"Shut it, Parker."

He slumps down in his seat and shakes his head.

"Look Tony, these are now my emotional support animals. Therefore, you cannot get rid of them."

"She kinda needs them if we're being honest. Snow almost had a full on breakdown when she walked in." James adds as he pets Alpine.

"Okay, that's besides the point. We're getting off topic." I tell him.

"Fine. You can keep them. But they stay in your room, not out here."

"Yeah, yeah sure." I wave my hand at him. "In the new compound, my room needs to be accessible to the outdoors for the kids. Got it?"

Tony grunts in response as he turns and walks away. I sigh and look back down at the goat.

My kimoyo beads ping, and my brows furrow as I open an email.

"What's that?" Peter asks.

I let out a groan. "Steve, Tony, Nat, Sam, Bruce, and Thor are cleared for SHIELD missions. Us and Wanda aren't."

"This fucking sucks." James says as his head falls back on the couch.

"Tell me about it, I spend too much time with you already. Now we have to do three more sessions."

"Any chance they switched around our pairs?"

"Nope."

"OH MY GOD IS THAT A GOAT?"

I jump in my seat and smile at Sam as he runs over. He comes over and stops in front of James, arms out.

"No," James says, holding Alpine closer to his chest. "Take Karl."