My time in Hawaii had to come to a sad end, i ended up staying two months with my mom. I stayed up in my room, I even tried paying my mom for the time I was there but both her and Robert refused. I even debated moving but after some talk with my mom and manager I came to the conclusion that I couldn't. I was needed in L.A., I needed to record the music I've wrote since I left and even the music I wrote before I left. I needed to get more music out, the last 2 months went by so fast and I enjoyed every second of it. I was able to find myself again but a part of me thought that I might lose her again.
I walked into my cold dark apartment, i told my landlord I'd be moving out once my lease was up in December which was only a few months away. I hadn't looked for a house or condo yet but i made it the first thing I did. I opened my laptop and started searching, I found a cute condo in the hills away from the city but I didn't like the narrow curvy roads to get there. I found another but too close to the city, I finally found a townhouse near the ocean. it was only a 30 minute drive to L.A. and it was excluded from traffic and people. it was beautiful and cheaper than I would have expected. I called the property manager and got an appointment to see the house the next day.
I cleaned my apartment, top to bottom and even packed away things that I hardly used to donate. it was around midnight when I got a text, it was Alexis.
alexis<33
you're back in la? wanna go to a party tonight?
yeah, im back but no thanks im really tired and not in the mood
are you sure? your old friend Daniel invited me, it's at his house..we've been hanging out a lot recently;)
oh? that's cool.
I put my phone down and frowned, I really hoped Daniel didn't get caught in the same loop I did. I click his contact and FaceTime him, it rings until my screen said he was unavailable. I grabbed my keys and headed to his house. I didn't realise I was wearing a crop top and leggings until I was in my small car. I FaceTime him again and he hung up on me, I drop my jaw and wait a few seconds before tryin to call again. he hangs up again, I put my car in reverse and pull out of my parking space, I drive to his big house, the traffic wad light since it was 1am. I heard the music from down the street and saw the lights and people, I really hated the way I looked but I was just trying to find my friend. While I was gone I tried talking to him but his responses were dry and now he's just ignoring me. I parked and gathered my thoughts before storming into the house filled with drunks and potheads. I walked in and the stench of marijuana hit me, a part of me wanted to join a circle and smoke but I knew better than that. i walk around the house trying to find Daniel, it took me almost 5 minutes to find him, I became nervous and somehow angry.
He was standing with beer to his lips and his eye lids sagging, Alexis wasn't in sight but he was talking to another girl. She looked high off her ads as well as Daniel. I could tell he was flirting with her, I take a deep breath and walk towards him. The girl noticed me first and she looked me up and down with a nasty look on her face. "Daniel we need to talk" I glance at the girl, then back at him "now." he tolls his eyes, "I'm ignoring you for reason" he still hasn't looked at, I furrowed my eyebrows, i looked to see the opened bathroom door 2 feet away. I grab his arm "hey!" I pull him into the bathroom slamming the door behind him. "Daniel James Seavey" he rolls his eyes again and mocks me "daniel James Seavey, shut up will you? God you're not my mother" I look him in the eye, he avoided making eye contact with me. he was too afraid too, I step closer grabbing his face "look at me" I whisper, he looks up at the ceiling "please" I whisper, he gives in looking at me. "dont do this to yourself, i know it's stupid, a few months ago we were in opposite positions but I know now I should have listened, and toy knew that too but please listen to me" he stayed silent, I pat his cheek "please" he cracks, he pulls me in and hugs me "I'm sorry" we say unison, we both laugh and hold each other.
••
Somehow I ended up staying for the party, Daniel and I stayed together to make sure we both stay sober of atleast somewhat. I was nervous to run into Alexis but she never showed up, I really needed to stay away from her. All we did we hung out was smoke and party and i dont want to do that anymore..it isn't me. I notice a girl talking to Daniel, he was only a few feet from me, you could tell she was into him but he seemed to hold himself back. I watched cautiously, making sure she didn't see me. She flirted with him but stood awkwardly nodding and smiling. He caught my eye and I open my eyes wider nodding towards her and mouthing "go for it" and he raised his eyebrow, the girl turned around so fast her eyes landing on me, my stomach flops, she was so pretty and made me automatically feel insecure. I gulped walking over, she watches me but doesn't give me a dirty look eventhough I wouldn't blame her for doing it. "can we have a minute?" I ask her sweetly and she nods and steps away leaving a few feet between us. He bends over bringing his ear to my mouth leaving enough room for me to whisper to him "stop bein awkward and talk to her, she's gorgeous!" he pulls away looking at me "I'm nervous" he fiddles with hid hands, "she's really pretty and I don't want to sound like an idiot and ruin it" my heart melts, his face was flushed and he kept biting his cheek "awww daniel" he covers his face "stop Lucy oh my god" I hug him and turn back to the girl, she was watching the crowd dance. "hey!" She turns, a smile on her face. She had beautiful green eyes and curly black hair, with freckles sprinkled perfectly over her cheeks and nose. She walks over "hello, im Eve" I smile "I'm lucy, sorry for interrupting you two" I step back, "eve, Daniel here thinks your beautiful and he's nervous because he has no idea how to talk to you" both their faces turn red and Eve plays with dress, I whisper to Daniel "good luck!" and wave goodbye to Eve but she stopped me "can we be friends?" she asks, I smile wide, i nod to Daniel "yeah, text me, get my number from Daniel and while you're at it get his" I wink and walk away, I felt so accomplished and over joyed. She was beautiful and I could already feel the sexual tension between them. and if they don't work out, I have a new friend.
I walk up the stairs, the hallway was dark but I could still see where I was going. I heard yelling and got closer, I find the room it was coming from. My heart dropped to my stomach, it was Jonah's room. "You don't love me jonah!" She screams, "You told me you did but you don't, you can't just pull me in this string until you find someone better" she started crying, my heart breaks at her pain, although I didn't know her, I knew how she felt "that's not true" he says, she scoffs "yeah right, Jonah. you can't tell me I'm wrong, you're always saying another girls name in your sleep, I never asked because I didn't want my feelings hurt!" her voice began to crack, my heart pumped faster and faster "who's name do i call?" his voice was monotone, no emotion, not the Jonah I know. "Lucy" she says put of breath, I gasp losing my breath. The room is quiet, I let a tear slip from my eyes, I stepped into corbyns dark room which was right besides Jonah's to hear better. "Who's Lucy?" she says, I hear shuffling and the i hear him pick something up. "her" he said, I couldn't see I'm the room but I knew what he picked up. I knew it was a picture of us, the one I gave him before i broke it off with him. "why aren't you with her then? why are you here with me?" she cried, I felt my heart break, I wish she wasn't feeling this way, I know how bad it hurts. She didn't deserve this, "because I ruined it, I ruined her, I " he paused, "i loved her but when she told me she loved me, I lied" he voice falls "i lied to protect her" the frame was placed on the table "protect her from what?" she says, I know she was done, done with him and done with the conversation but she still wanted answers. I wanted answers, if he loved me why did he tell me he didn't? why did he break my heart and throw it to the side like it meant nothing, he didn't protect me from anything, he just hurt me more than he could ever hurt me. "protect her from me" I could hear the pain in his voice "i would have done the same thing I'm doing to you right now, i break everything I touch, I fell inlove with her, her soul, her heart, her. but i knee if I stayed she would get hurt more than she would ever be hurt, she didn't deserve that. and neither do you and im sorry, I thought u could fill the void of Lucy but I couldn't. and im sorry, I'm sorry to you and im sorry to Lucy. im not perfect and no good for you nor Lucy, the look in her eyes when I told her I didn't love her hurt me more than anything but I couldn't bear the pain I would give her if I broke any more than that" his body hits the wall where I was standing, he slid down and my body followed. My face was filled with tears, my heart twisted and my thoughts filled with crazy thoughts, I couldn't understand the feeling i felt, I didn't know if it was relief or if it was pain. "you shouldn't have decided that for her, if she loved you and wanted to be with you. you shouldn't have pushed her away" she says, my heart aches for her, "she loved you jonah, if you were going to hurt her it would be her choice to let you or not, not yours" the silence grew and I felt my adrenaline rush to my head. I hear someone move but I could tell by the lite steps it was her, I hear a drawer open then shut and a zip of a bag. She sighs "good luck Jonah, I hope you make everything right, the last 5 months have been amazing, I hope you find Lucy and make everything right" I hear her kiss him but I could tell by the sound she didn't kiss his lips. "goodbye jonah" the door opens, my heart jumps "goodbye annalise" the door closes and she walks down the hall, I stay where I was, not moving. I hear something slam against the wall and I flinch, I run down the stairs forgetting I had tears all down my face. Jonah's door opens "Lucy?"
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hahahahahahahaha cliffhangers
also this chapter is wayyy longer than normal. you're welcome, I'll update soon!