Pulling into the drive way I sigh. Life seems to be throwing daggers at me and everything is a blur.
Me and Ariana had a fight a couple of days ago and haven't talked since. She kissed a guy, that hurts. She wasn't even drinking?! We didn't even have an argument before or nothing. Everytime I think of it by heart breaks, it's like a fluttering sensation but it doesn't feel good. It allows your breathing to hinge and your eyes to water. All I wanted was to be her only one, to be the one she tells her secrets. I made sure to send her million of paragraphs. To spend time with her. I remember important dates. I provide myself for all her sensual pleasures. Attention wasn't a bother because I can't think of anything but her. I'm the perfect girlfriend. But somewhere along that line I must've missed a step. Because now she's gone.
On top of it all my dad is really sick. The doctors say they're not sure what it is but they did do a scan and run a few tests, the results should be back by tomorrow. I might just drop college and work for my dad until the company is mine. That way I can be close to home, to help my mom with the boys and dad. I'm gonna be asking them to stop attending.
Turning the car off, I get out and enter the house. My mom is sitting on the couch, her head down in her hands. My eyes sting from the sight. No happy tears. Making my way over to her, I bite my lip to stop myself from crying also. She needs a shoulder. Her head immediatly shoots up as soon as I touch her shoulder. She wipes her eyes and stands up giving me a hug. She tries pulling away but I hold on to her. Sobs escapes her lips making me hold tighter. She starts sinking to the floor and I go down with her. After a couple long minutes of nothing but the sobs of the woman who have kept this family together, she calmed down. Or just ran out of tears.
"Mom, let's get you in bed." I tell her and start lifting her from the ground.
I help her up the stairs to her room and tuck her in bed. "I'll go pick the boys up. Just rest up." I kiss her forehead then start leaving. "I love you Mom."
Quickly I grab the keys and drive to Xavy's school. Entering the building the sound of giggles rings through the atmosphere. I ask for him and in no time we're both in the car heading to get Alex.
"How was school little man?" I ask trying to start a conversation. "I missed you." I say glancing at him through the mirror.
"Is dad going to be fine?" He asks.
Why couldn't he just let me control this darn conversation. "Yeah, of course."
"Alex says he's gonna leave us. But not like how you left. Forever."
"Xavy listen, Alex doesn't know what he's talking about. I promise you, dad will be okay." I tell him while pulling up to Alex's school.
I wait in the parking lot until I see him walking outside. His backpack flung over one shoulder and his jacket in one hand being pulled on the ground. His head hanging low as he opens the door and climbs in.
"Hey, you good?" I ask him.
"Just take me home y/n." He murmurs resting his head on the car window.
"Al-"
"Just take me home! I wanna go home!" He yells at me.
I look around to see Xavier with a pout on his face. His eyes welding with tears.
"Okay, let's go home." I whisper softly.
The drive to the house was silent. I have no clue what to say to either of them. How does someone cope with this? Knowing you can't help your family. It's clear to everyone what's happening. And I seem to be the only one in denial. I won't accept it, I can't accept it.
The car stops and everyone gets out. Alex slams the door shut and walks away. I grab Xavy's hand and lead him into the house.
"Go put your stuff down bud, I'll make you something to eat." I tell him.
"Pizza?" I turn my head to the sound of the voice. "Can we get pizza?" Alex asks, I nod and he spins back around helping our younger sibling up the stairs.
I order pizza, 3 large pizzas. Two cheese, and one pineapple. That should carry us through the night. After I quickly climb the stairs and make my way to my parents room. I push the door open, pull the curtains and pulling the covers over my sleeping mother, then turning the light off.
I push my old room door open and smile. My parents kept it clean, just for me. I make my way inside and sit on the bed. Reaching over to the small table beside the bed I grab a picture. This is new.
Me, the boys and Ari. Ari.
I reach in my pockets and remove my phone to meet the smile that never failed to make my day a little better. And today was no exception. I still love her. How could I not? Brushing my fingers over her face, images of the day she took the picture, flashes through my mind.
We were curled up in her bed having a lazy day. Me laying my back against the headboard of the bed, and her with her head in my lap. No ponytail, just natural silky, curled up hair. She was complaining about some stuff going on with the music industry but going crazy for the fact that Katy Perry is pregnant, I hummed softly so she knew I was still listening as I run my fingers through her hair. Suddenly she reached for my phone and just started taking random pics.
My phone vibrates and I read the callers ID. Court🍃
"Hey, sup?"
"What?? Where is she?"
"She can't come here Courtney, I have to be alone right now."
"What do you mean she's already gone?"
"I thought-"
I loud honk outside grabs my attention.
"She's here. I gotta go, thanks for the call by the way."
I make my way downstairs and pull the door open. It's raining? Damn.
