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thirty-three

Chapter 33

"I wish it didn't end this way. You were too young, too beautiful. You deserved so much more than this life I dragged you into. When I heard you scream, saw you on the ground, with blood covering your clothes and then your hands a part of me died and a part of you will live on in me. You were so brave in my arms even though it would be your last moments upon this earth. You told us that you loved us and my god, we love you too. You death is a tragedy and you lost your life taking bits and pieces of our souls with you. You lost your life because someone called for chaos pain and strife. But in our minds you are not just dead. You are a warrior and a hero, but most importantly you died loved beyond limits. We love you Annabelle Marie Stone." 

2 weeks later

"Cat please come out," Zayn knocks on the door. 

I don't answer; I stare at the walls of my room. I usually feel comfort and safe within my covers but I feel the opposite. I'm numb and cold. I hurt. I feel like a zombie or a robot, I don't feel anything. 

"You need to eat," Louis says. 

Whenever I try to eat, a lump of sadness in my throat stops me. 

"I know you're not asleep," Zayn states. 

I can't sleep at night. Whenever I do I have nightmares. 

"Niall could use you right now," Louis says quietly. 

I feel whenever Niall looks at me he blames me for her death. He too blames me because I blame myself. 

"Cat opens up the door before I knock it down. I'm sick of this." Zayn says his tone is serious and a bit angry. 

I find the strength to get out of the covers and make my way to open the door. 

"What?" I ask walking back to my bed. Louis and Zayn walk in. 

"Look we get it, you're upset. We all are but we all need each other. You being all sad and depressed in here alone isn't helping anyone. Just come out and we can all heal together." Zayn says. 

"This is how I deal with death and trust me I've done this many times before." 

"But it's never worked has it? You're not healed you just put your problems to the side thinking you won't have to come back to them but guess what? You do. These problems always creep their way back in as if they are the center of attention." Louis says.

"If you guys just wanted to come in here and criticize me for the way I handle things then get the hell out of here." I say. 

"No, we won't leave here until you come out and talk to us!" Zayn yells. 

I get up from the bed and walk past them, "Fine I'll go talk to Annabelle." 

It doesn’t take me long to realize what I just said. When I do, I fall to the floor and try to stop myself from crying by covering my mouth but I fail. Louis and Zayn stand there with hurt in their eyes not knowing what to do.

"Go get Harry." Zayn whispers to Louis. Louis walks out of the room to go fetch him as Zayn crouches next to me and pulls me into a hug. He tries to calm me down by rubbing my back and running his fingers through my hair. 

"You've been through way too much." He tells me, "I'm sorry." 

I hear hurried feet walk into the room and Zayn picks me up bridal style and puts me back on my bed then leaves the room leaving just Harry and I in the room.