stalking

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my back faced him as he slept peacefully beside me. my eyes were focused on the model's page. ever since shawn told me that he was doing a music video with this girl, i became jealous. i know i shouldn't be, but i feel like shawn deserves someone better, someone like her. she is stunning, silky blonde  hair, perfectly straight white teeth, sun kissed skin, curves in all the right places. she had everything i didn't. 

shawn's arm wrapped around my waist, "babe why are you still awake?" his raspy voice asked. 

"i-i just can't seem to fall asleep." i said turning my phone off before he saw what i was looking at. i turned on my side to face him, placed my head in the crook of his neck and cuddled closer to him. he ran his fingers through my hair knowing that it would help me fall asleep. my eyelids started getting heavy, and before i knew it i was asleep in his arms. 

"hey babe can i use your phone to order a pizza?" shawn asked. 

"yeah, it's on the night stand." shawn jogged up the stairs to get my phone. we were having a lazy movie day, so shawn had the brilliant idea to order a pizza. it was nice to finally have a day with him since he's been so busy with the music video.  i was looking through the movies when shawn walked back downstairs. 

"molly," his voice sounded angry, but soft. i looked up with confusion. his eyes were glued to my phone as his thumb scrolled. 

"what?" i asked nervously.  he was making me very worried. 

"why were you stalking hailey?" my heart dropped to my stomach, i could feel my cheeks heat up. his brown eyes met mine making me not know what to say. 

"i just wanted to see what she looked like." i lied. 

"so you had to look back all the way to may 28, 2015 to see what she looked like?" shawn asked with sarcasm laced in his voice. i didn't say anything causing shawn to sigh. 

"shawn," i tried to say something, but he cut me off. 

"are you jealous of her or something?" he asked pushing his eyebrows together. 

"i just felt like you were spending a lot of time together, we were starting to talk less and barely see each other. i just thought you were-," he cut me off once again. 

"you felt like i was cheating on you?" he raised his voice causing me to flinch. 

"no shawn! i just felt like your love for me was slowly fading." i admitted. 

"just because i was busy, and not showing you as much of attention as i usually do doesn't mean i don't love you anymore." shawn said making my chest tighten.

"this isn't the only reason i feel like this shawn." i said softly.

"then what are the other reasons?" he asked walking closer to me making my breathing hitch. 

"we would both come home from work and say about 3 sentences to each other, eat dinner, then go to bed. we barely talk or even kiss anymore shawn. i miss how it used to be when it was like we couldn't get enough of each other." i finally said what i have been wanting to say for months.

 after a few seconds of silence shawn finally spoke, "i'm sorry that you felt that way. i'm sorry that i didn't make you feel loved," he stepped closer to me leaving just a small space between us, "i love you so much, and i hate that you feel this way." he placed his hands on my arms and rubbed small circles with his thumbs as he spoke. "i'll make this up to you i promise." he hugged me tightly making me melt in his arms. 

"i love you shawn." 

i hope you like this molly. i had a little trouble making a story line out of it, and i feel like i could of made it a little better, but :)


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