dolan twins imagines.

Loosing him; {E+G}

I wrote this a while back, I've changed near enough everything from what it was supposed to be in a fanfic of mine. Which I didn't continue to write.

If you spot any mistakes; i/me/myself. Which I've not noticed and changed, I'm sorry.

Hope ya like it😌

You rolled over and let a sob fall from your lips, your parents crouched infront of you as sobs wrecked your body.

"I'm so sorry," they said. You continued to cry, shake and urge to yell in hurt. You shook your head.

"Babe." Your mom leaned in and brushed your hair from your wet cheeks.

You rolled right onto your stomach and let out a scream into your pillow, your sobs turned into continuous screams and tears would not stop falling-they were uncontrollable at that point.

You screamed into your pillow and completely broke down. The hurt and loss you've supposed to have felt over the past days had just hit you.

Grayson's death hadn't hit you until then.

You shook your head and sat up, punching your mattress as you screamed. Your dad left the room in sobs and your mom took you into her embrace, her cries silenting as your buried your face into her arm.

"He's not gone," you closed your eyes as tears continued to fall down your rosy cheeks, "Grayson can't be gone mom."

"I'm so sorry," is all she could utter. You cried and you cried and you cried.

You couldn't stop. You had no tears left but still, sobs left your lips and your body jolted with each one as you clutched onto your sheets that were pulled up under your chin.

Your eyes were bloodshot, red, puffy and glassy. You were dazed, you didn't know what had just hit you. You felt like an emotional wreck, you wasn't prepared for it.

Nobody was.

You wasn't prepared to loose him, the boy you loved, your bestfriend, your world. The only person on this earth beside your parents that managed to make you happy.

The boy who you loved dearly, a boy who could've talked to anyone else that was in that room that day. But chose you, and you thanked him.

You wouldn't have made it, not mentally. You wouldn't have been able to bring yourself to this point in life. And you thanked him so much for it.

You prayed that he was happy, wherever he may have been, you prayed he'd forever be happy.

"I love you Grayson," you cried. You buried your face into your comforter and tried to fall asleep.

You loved him so much, you really did. It was a privilege to have loved such a beautiful, caring young man such as himself. You really did love him.

You wished you could've said goodbye, but you were too late. You turned up, and there his family were. Breaking into a fit of sobs, all on their knees as they cried hysterically.

You felt utterly bad for them but you hoped for the best. You hoped they were crying from happiness, but you then suspected they wouldn't have cried that much.

Not unless they were in Grayson's position.

You hated seeing him in the hospital room, his pale, cold body laid stiff and unmoving. No life held in it whatsoever, you hated it.

You wanted to cry but thought it was a dream, a nightmare. You kissed him and for once, he never kissed back.

You sighed. You walked out of the room whispering a quiet 'goodbye.' You didn't know what else to say, you soon found yourself on the floor with Ethan clutched to you.

He claimed you were all he had left, but he had his family surrounding him. You guessed he wanted someone he thought was mentally stable around.

He was wrong. So very wrong.

You wasn't in a good frame of mind at that point, you felt sick to your stomach. You felt dreadful.

You've never felt so sick in your life, but still you held onto Ethan as he cried. His sobs echoed the cold hallway as you sat with your back to the wall and Ethan laid on the floor, his head on your lap with his face buried into your lower abdomen. His arms wrapped securely around your waist and his hand fisted on your shirt, making sure you didn't leave.

You ran your hands through his hair and promised it'll be alright, it was all you could think to say.

"It'll be alright," you cooed, running your hands through his jet black hair as his cries intensified. You silenced yourself, you guessed it reminded him of Grayson. You figured Grayson must've said it about hate at some points.

"It'll be alright, we'll get through it." Grayson's voice ran through your head and you sighed.

You really missed him, you pondered on what to say sometimes. You didn't want to talk of Grayson, you didn't want to cry.

So you silenced yourself, for a very long time. You would only speak if it were about life itself, or Ethan and how he was doing.

You knew.

You knew when he looked at you with his face full of worry and sympathy. You knew he were sick again, he looked it to be honest. He then told you that he was sick and it was worse than before.

You cried yourself to sleep that night knowing there was no cure for how bad it was, chemo wouldn't have helped it. And that killed you mentally.

You didn't prepare yourself for the worst you believed he would be a miracle, a fluke, an anomaly. Something of that sort. But of course the world doesn't grant such wishes.

You guessed heaven just couldn't wait for him any longer.

You really do miss him, to this day and forwards. You'll forever miss him.

Forever missing his laugh, which was abnormally loud. Forever missing his smile, which he was so confident about. Forever missing his lips, how plump and pink they were.

Forever missing Grayson himself, everything you loved about him had just went from being reality, to a memory.

In a matter of seconds.

It was only seconds and a switch had flipped. You found a love so real. But it was out of touch. It wasn't fair.

And from then on, since loosing him. You've always expected the unexpected.
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A/n;; i think this is the best imagine I've ever wrote in my life😫❤️

-Taylor🍃💚