*Jessie*
The worry rushing through my body was unreal, although my sisters can be difficult to handle at times I still am there for them whenever they need me as they are with me. Hannah needs me now wether she admits it or not. After a few minutes of being outside with Danny I bite my pride and and walk back in with my head held high showing them I'm the bigger one. My mum looks at me and similes I think to say 'thank god know of them has decided to act mature' and then she goes to look at Hannah that had suddenly gone sheep white. That had been happening a lot lately after any kind of bad discussion she goes sheep white and pipes down almost like she's going to fall asleep. Something tells me that's going to be hard for her to not be ill during this long treatment.
Jessie: Han are you ok
Hannah: Jess listen to me I'm sorry about earlier, my mood is all over the place just forgive me please
Jessie; Han I wasn't angry just upset
Hannah: so you forgive me
Jessie; yeah don't worry
Hannah: I do worry
Jessie; you don't have to
Hannah: I do though I don't wanna die with you hating me
Jessie; what the fuck Han your not going to die
Hannah; Jess I have a different feeling about this
Jessie: don't scare me please, it's hard enough
Hannah: Jessica what do you want me to do,do you want me to start this treatment and lie to you would you rather I lied to you and not tell you how I was feeling. You always say Jess when it comes to health don't lie to me if someone's ill tell you if your I'll tell you don't hide it that's what I'm trying to do Jess
The tears we hot in my eyes but I didn't want them to spill I just didn't
Jessie: what are you saying?
Hannah; I'm saying I don't know if I can make this fight it's hard enough already Jess and I haven't even started, my head is drained and I don't feel me I don't feel alive
Jessie: why is everyone staying quite, they know how you feel don't they and I was kept out the link
Hannah: I didn't want to hurt you
Jessie; but you thing you'd tell me when your about to start it nice Hannah nice I want to be kept in this link were a family don't push me out, and don't even use the Jess you were stressed because you don't think it's gunna make me worse now because what's happening is happening in the next hour so don't !
Hannah: I'm sorry Jess I just didn't know what way to tell you, don't say you didn't expect it because the way I've been I'm normal one minute and then the next I'm fucking I'll as you can imagine I'm not gunna make this fight that's why everyone looks drained because they've known for months
Rachel: that's what I was trying to hint to you Jess I didn't think It was my place to say but Hannah told me to so don't have a go at her it's my fault you don't know
Rose: Jessie sweet heart she's a fight per I don't believe it either
Jessie: Dan I can't do this I can't
I'm about to walk out when my dad Grabs my arm and palls me into him
Steven: You three girls are my life don't you think it's hard for me to see as well but Jess don't walk out on this this family needs to stick to together me your mum Hannah Rachel and Danny we need to do this, the people in this room now are the people that I respect the most minus the kids so we all need to stand to get her and hold each others hands through this come on Jess be strong for me
Jessie: Dad you don't know what it's like you don't have any siblings losing one of them is like losing my leg
Rachel: and you nearly did that once
Jessie: not now
Rachel: sorry
Hannah: Jess I never said I wouldn't fight I'm just saying its gunna be hard I'm gunna try but don't have your hopes up for that ok
Jessie: wait wait wait what have you said to me before to fight, don't think negative what are you doing don't be a hypocrite and stand your ground don't tell me to fight when your not gunna try fight the bitch of an illness don't you wanna see your kids grow up don't you wanna see Morgan and maize grow up Rosie and Shaya? You wanna miss all of that I mean Kian's not even 6 months yet
Hannah: Jess don't remind me but I know that if I lose this fight my kids will be looked after and looked after well I know even if I don't see my nieces and nephews grow up I know they'll grow up amazingly maybe this is my time you always say everything happens for a reason
Jessie: yeah but I don't understand this one, I don't want to lose you I don't want to live a life without my sister me and Rachel won't cope with that
Hannah: it's not me that's controlling my fight it's him upstairs
Jessie: ray for me for us
Hannah: guys I wanna talk to you one by one so mum first
Rose: go on then
Hannah: if I don't make this fight, don't be sad know I'm in a better place I and I'm not suffering make sure my kids are safe and I love them don't let them be sad
Rose: oh Han
Hannah: I'm gunna move on to dad before I cry, dad look after mum look after the rest of them your he best dad honestly
Steven: I love you baby girl but this isn't goodbye
Hannah: you don't know that I might be to ill later to say anything, Rach look after Jess and yourself don't give up hope on men you'll find someone and if he's a knob I'm sure Jess will knock him into shape
Rachel: trust you I love you sis
Hannah: love ya too, Jessica right keep that head up your voice will lead you the way sing your head to the clouds continue your dreams because right now there above the roof don't slow down because of me, I'm so proud if you have been since it started. Rosie and Shaya will always be here for you even when dans on tour I live you baby sis
Jessie: I love you too
Hannah: Dan the man what can I say, I don't need to tell you to look after Jess because you do a better job than us she loves you we love you the girls do to. I just ask you to be there for her if I do,...you know because she's good at putting on a front but when she's around you it breaks down. Thank you for everything you've done for us Dan I love you like the brother we never had
Danny: thanks Han and you have my word I will look after Jess and the girls until I die even after so you don't have to worry, you like my sister now too love you too
Hannah: I love you all guys...
A/N
HEY tell me what you think should happen with Hannah?
