Urgh, Rants & Sh*t

Myths About Canadians

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Alright! Let's get into this! So, there are lots of myths and misconceptions about Canada and Canadians.

Many people outside of Canada have these ideas about Canadians, which most of them aren't true.

So first off, it isn't always cold in Canada. Many people think we live in igloos and have polar bears as pets... UHM NO WE DON'T. During the summer in Canada, there are days where it's burning hot. Our winters are pretty sturdy but they can be as cold as winters in the US.

Next myth, this is a pretty funny and dumb one, uhm... how can I say this? We don't have Maple syrup as blood. Yeah, I know surprise surprise. Also, we're not addicted to maple syrup! I know we produce lots of Maple syrup, and we're big marketers of Maple syrup, but we don't only eat that shit for breakfast, dinner and supper. We don't, okay? I know I'm eating maple syrup ice cream right now, but that doesn't mean we're addicted to it. We just have lots of it.

Another thing which I didn't know about but there are lots of non-Canadians who think this: we don't all know eachother. Apparently there's this myth that all Canadians know eachother. Like since when do I know Kali from Manitoba? I don't. We're not all close and know eachother's names like they're the back of our hands.

Another one, the myth that Canadians don't have guns. We do, actually. You can own a gun if you have a license, but you can't have it in your bag or truck while going around town. It must stay in your house, and if ever you bring it somewhere out of your house, it has to be at a gun training place. Like a specific place where you can practice shooting your guns.

Toronto is the Capital of Canada. No it is not. Ottawa is the Capital of Canada, but not Toronto. People may think this because Toronto is very attractive to tourists, but still, it ain't the Capital of Canada.

Next one, we're always polite and say sorry to everything. Now this, OH HELL NO. There are people in Canada that are complete assholes. Canadians aren't all nice and chill. We're not all complete shits, but there are lots of people whose morals aren't the right way around.

Another thing, which I don't know why people think this, Queen Elizabeth DOESN'T RUN OUR COUNTRY. Like why would you even think this? We have someone called a "prime minister", which is kind of like a president, but it's a bit different.

Now this is pretty weird, lots of people think that all Canadians speak French, which is definitely not true. According to statistics, about 30% of Canadians can speak French, so yeah, that's not really true.

So now that I'm tired of talking about myths, let's talk about real things. Uhm, first off, our prime minister is PRETTY GOOD LOOKING. I know this isn't important, but look at Trump, then look at this guy right here: (Justin Trudeau)

Mmkay, I know he's not Chris Hemsworth, but he's still pretty cute. Compared to some other leaders.

Another Myth that is true, most of us Canadians (but not all of us), drink bagged milk. OKAY, I know this is a surprise, but we do. Look at this:

Then you're like: HOW ZE FUK DO YOU DRINK THAT???!?!!? It's in fact really easy, we do it like this:

You see, it's as easy as that. Pretty efficient I might say. Some call it magic, I call it bagged milk.

Now last but not least, our money is in fact water proof. Yes, unlike American money, ours is made from synthetic polymer. Look at this:

So yeah, Canada is pretty awesome. If Trump gets elected and you guys wanna come here, sure, just don't overpopulate our country, we're fine here left alone. We don't want anyone ruining our fun here in Canada, haha.
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