Private and the Captain ( Jelsa / Big 5 / Big x

14 Harsh and Cold

POV Jack

Sometimes I just wonder how I get messed up in stuff which I wanted to avoid. Besides I wasn't even drinking yesterday so I'm not doing things because I get too soft. Even though liquor might be my salvation and solution for somewhat good night sleep it causes me to act differently, in a way that I don't want to and show another side of me. The side which I need to hide.

The best thing would be just to shoot a bullet through my brain and end my suffering and the suffering of others who are near me. My brother's, Guardian friends and everyone else's. However I can't, not until I have had my revenge.

Yesterday I was about to give up, her words went through my hard core and straight to stab my heart. That Private, Arendelle found my weak spot and almost made me to break. Well, she succeeded but... she was also the one to stop me. That I can't deny.

Captain Toothiana had found my gun from The Den when her Private Corona had heard the shot and went in. She gave me a preaching and was so sure that I need some mental help. I lied to her, about me having a shrink to speak with.

And do I have a shrink? Nah. However I guess that I can someday open up to Private Arendelle if I'm in the verge of aiming a gun to my forehead again.

It's time for me to get up.

I got dressed fast and went to kennel where my dog, Staff had his own cage. His glowing blue eyes were almost like examining me.

"I'm alright," I say to my dog while smiling when I get it out from its cage. Our early morning routine is to go out for a walk. And I do it again this morning.

After our run I return Staff to its kennel. It's a shame that he hasn't been out from his cage in a long time. Well technically he has but I mean that neither of us has been in a place that we could call home. Last time was before Emma...

I look up and see how the sun is rising. It's warming up my cold skin, the sun rays are painting everything in vibrant colors. I just try to enjoy moments like this as long as I can in this world. The moment always stops when you stay and enjoy the beautiful aspects of nature. The seasons, night and morning sky and how everything has its place.

Then there are the freaks of nature like I am. Like some others are too, most of them are gathered into this base. They have these abilities, some are clear and easy to see but some are like these hidden talents. We know their talents but the way they show them to us is the most important factor.

That's what my father told me.

When I was born I wasn't breathing, I was almost dead. They had to do c-section because I had frozen the baby water around me and I couldn't breathe. He always said that I was protecting my older twin by doing so and I would be the older one but I was giving my own life for his. He had killed his twin in the womb by freezing him. Our power might be deadly which I have realized by now.

Pitch Black, he used to be part of us.

Toothiana, Bunnymund, North, Sandy and Pitch had all came to base same time. Toothiana had shown her power by helping a baby bird back to its nest. Bunnymund saved a kid who was crossing the street and about to be overrun. North? Well he is expert when it comes to traveling but his sword skills are amazing, he had organized a fest for them and did some amazing cooking. That's what they told me.

Sandy and Pitch were always competing. Sandy has an amazing talent of seeing people's inner dreams and using them. They had a free weekend when his talent came to surface. They went into amusement park where some little girl wanted a teddy bear so Sandy just won it for her. Pitch on the other hand... he showed his power on training field and nearly killed Sandy but he seemed remorseful so my... Colonel Moon let him stay. That's his mistake, my mistake was to let Emma go into army.