His Secret (l.h)

Chapter Thirty-Five

Night Fifty-Eight, Maryland Heights
July 24th

Inhale. Hold. Exhale. Repeat. Again. And again. We do it all the damn time, but we always forget to hold. We don't wait anymore. We don't stand still and appreciate what is around us. The little things in life. How the sun kisses your skin, how the beads clink together in the breeze. The rain that hides your tears, but is somehow always there to lull you to sleep, and will be your only friend at night. But no one ever tells you to appreciate the inhale you make. The touch of another person. Their warm touch. A warmth that seems to cause goosebumps. No one ever warns you that the touch that was once warm, goes cold.

"Here I am waking up,
Still can't sleep on your side
There's your coffee cup,
The lipstick stain fades with time
If I can dream long enough,
You'd tell me I'll be just fine
I'll be just fine"

Luke stared into the crowd and his heart felt as if it were in his throat. Just one more song, and I'll be on that plane. Luke had to remind himself, but it felt each song had somehow got longer. That each passing minute turned into an hour. He looked down into the pit and each face held tears in their eyes. But the longer he stared, he swore he saw their faces tune into a mocking look. They knew. Luke quickly blinked and looked up the seats before he started to strum the chords.

Inhale. Hold. Exhale. Maeve repeated as she sat in the lounge with Elizabeth in her arms. Liz had gone back home yesterday, Maeve took her down to the airport and waved her goodbye to make sure she got through all okay. Liz had tried to protest and say that she was fine and could handle herself, Maeve only wanted to refine the favour of care. Liz had done a lot for Maeve, a lot more than her own mother would have and has done. Maeve appreciated Liz a lot, all the things she had done and helped Maeve through the day. Even if it were to just get through that day itself.

Maeve smiled as she stared out the glass patio door, the sun was starting to disappear behind the trees. The sky itself was turning into a pastel pink with soft hues of oranges and yellows, birds soared the sky for the last time before landing in bushes and trees. She watched how the city lights started to flicker on and as did the garden lights, the little pathway that Luke had made while on their small break. Each light turned a different colour slowly, and Maeve and Elizabeth lived to watch them every evening.

Maeve looked back down to Elizabeth who had now fallen asleep, her pacifier hanging out of her mouth as she slept soundlessly. At four months, Elizabeth was getting better at sleeping and staying asleep for most of the night. Only a few nights she would wake and cry, but it was never as hard as it was once to make sure she went back off to sleep. Elizabeth was able to go off to sleep without the sound of her father singing or even talking now, but sometimes that's all Elizabeth needs, and without even realising, Maeve needed to hear him to. She would often wake up to silence but the vinyl sat perfectly on the record player. Untouched.

Slowly, Maeve stood to her feet and hushed Elizabeth softly and continued to gently rock her as she walked up the stairs. Petunia followed the two up the stairs until they reached the main bedroom. She placed a delicate kiss to Elizabeth's forehead and laid her down in her crib. Petunia jumped up on the bed and watched Maeve walk across the room to remove the clip from her hair.

Maeve sighed in relief as the tension on the back of her head released. She ran a hand through her hair and scratched at where the tension once was. Maeve stared into the dimly lit vanity mirror, her lips parted slightly as she saw her reflection. Her skin seemed more pale, her eyes looked to be more sunken into her head.

Maeve chewed at her lip and looked away, moving to the dresser she picked out Luke's infamous red shirt and removed her dress and slipped her arms through the large shirt. She grabbed her dress and threw it into the laundry basket before making her way back to the bedroom.