Post Vitam

Chapter 164

Shota Aizawa found himself despondent and uncertain what to do by the time the doctors and nurses told him to give them space. He knew bringing his sons to the hospital instead of letting them stay at the U.A infirmary was a good decision. Recovery Girl, bless her, is getting old and while her healing quirk is legendary she can only do so much as a school nurse.

Besides, the situation with his sons is unheard of. Never before has anyone been able to save someone who had lost so much blood. Gods, the blood... He's used to seeing horrific deeds and scenes, it comes with the job.

Especially as an underground hero who sees the darker side of villainy, the side limelight heroes never bother to acknowledge because there's no fame in helping the poor. To see something like that involving his own children? There's nothing in the world that could have prepared him for that.

Except maybe the first time he failed, the day Oboro did what he did... There was just as much blood back then, maybe that's why he initially froze? How is he supposed to face his kids? He's such a failure...

Sitting there, in the hallway not far from the beds of his children he was wallowing in his failures at everything he does when a familiar voice grabbed his attention.

"Sho... how are they?"

It was his boyfriend, Hizashi. Gods, yet more of his failure to be reminded of...

He sat down next to him and gently touched his arm "Sho?"

Shota wanted to remain resolute, strong and stable, but Hizashi has always been able to see past the protective mask he wears for the cruel world. "I-" Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes threatening to fall.

He let them when he looked directly into his boyfriend's green eyes, reminding of how scared Izuku looked holding the near dead body of his brother... "I'm a failure Zashi!" he cried

"Don't be silly Sho..." Hizashi said, putting an arm around him.

"It's true!" He protested, no longer even bothering to hide the tears. "I'm a failure as a father, as a hero, as a teacher..." He looked past Hizashi, not wanting to see his reaction. "As a partner..."

Hizashi lightly bumped him to the side and then pulled him back. "Hush, today has been rough for sure, but it doesn't mean you're a failure Sho..."

Shota shook his head in disagreement. "I am, I just stood there..." The memory of it flashed before him. "I was horrified thinking I lost Hitoshi... I didn't do anything. If it wasn't for Izuku..." he trailed off as tears fell at a steady pace now, not wanting to acknowledge the possibility of what could have happened.

Hizashi pulled him in closer "Oh Sho..."

"There was so much blood... him I haven't seen that much since–" the rest of his sentence died in his throat, unable to even say the words.

Hizashi adjusted the way he was sitting so he could have a better angle as he looked directly into Shota's eyes. Shota looked away but he grabbed his chin gently so he had to look at him. "Okay mister, I thought we agreed to not go down that road."

It was true after they lost Oboro both of them had been broken to the world. So much so that by either divine intervention or utterly ridiculous happenstance they had both gone to the same roof to kill themselves. They saved each other and shared how each of them had blamed themselves for how their friend had died.

"He wouldn't want either of us to blame ourselves. Remember?" he continued seeing a small spark reignite in the other's eyes. Hizashi couldn't help but fall just a bit more in love with him seeing it. He smiled and kissed Shota on the cheek, settling their foreheads together. "As for the kids, they are still here. We can try again, and learn to be better."

Shota's eyes went wide in surprise. Their last argument being over how despite how they agreed to slowly integrate their relationship into the kids lives, nothing much had changed. So hearing that despite Hizashi's frustrations he was still willing to count himself as part of the family. "We?"

"Yes we Sho." Hizashi chuckled.

"You're not still mad at me?"

Hizashi gave him a light kiss hoping to convey just how much he always has and most likely always will love this stubborn man. "I was never mad Sho" he said with a watery smile and sighed.

"I was sad you didn't include me, but I should have known it wasn't intentional. You've always been stuck behind that wall you built around your heart even before–"

"Marry me?" Shota cut him off.

"w-w-What?!" Hizashi stuttered, pulling their heads apart to make sure he heard properly. Maybe his hearing aids are acting up... "Sho?"

Shota couldn't believe it had taken him this long. Hizashi was right, as always. He's been stuck behind defenses he put up to ward off the world. Granted they were there for a reason but Hizashi doesn't need to be counted among the rest of the world. He's done nothing but love him, save him and be there.

"I'm serious Zashi." He said, grabbing Hizashi's head between his hands. "Life is too short for most of us and I never want you to think that I don't want to include you in my life ever again." He kissed him before he continued. "I love you so much Hizashi, my life is empty without you."

Shota shifted around so that he was kneeling before Hizashi. "Will you Marry me Hizashi?"

Hizashi felt the tears before he knew he was crying and unlike the multiple times he's cried lately these were tears of pure joy. He'd all but given up on the notion that he and Shota would ever get married. He understood why Shota had been hesitant all these years, too afraid to commit to that level of pain if anything goes wrong. He's never been more glad to be wrong about something. Never been so happy that Shota, the most stubborn man on the face of the earth, was able to change his mind on something.

He dove forward right into Shota's arms, sending them both falling to the floor with Hizashi on top of him. "I would like nothing more Shota." He said with a watery smile and kissed him.

"So is that a yes then?" Shota teased

"Yes." Hizashi chuckled.

"Yes, I'll marry you Shota Aizawa."