Whatever It Takes

Chapter 80 - Nothing Yet?

Steve has to carry you back to the palace. As the ash continues to swirl around you can't help but think, is that Bucky? Sam? A part of you still believes this is some cruel joke; maybe you hit your head too hard. The reality is just too hard to face.

It feels like another knife in your gut when you hear that Shuri and Ramonda have gone too. The pain seems never ending.

"This is unprecedented," You hear Ayo, less stoic than you've ever seen but still with an air of defiance. "Perhaps you had better go back with your friends. Wakanda may not be as safe for you anymore." Finally the conversation catches up with you and a lump starts in your throat.

"This is my home." You manage to get out, voice hoarse even though you've managed to keep your anger and pain in silence.

"This was your home," Okoye interjects, trying and yet struggling to keep her emotions at bay. "I'm sorry Wolf," Her eyes soften when she meets yours. "But the world is on fire, you need to go with your family." Despite trying to fight it you understand the words that she didn't say; with Bucky gone, there's nothing for you in Wakanda anymore.

Without words you nod and make your way to the Quinjet; Steve and Nat following closely behind as your unsteady on your feet. Everyone is a little, the effect of the fight catching up.

A strong hand finds your shoulder and you turn to see M'Baku. He places his arms across his chest and bows, and it takes all of your residual strength and energy to reply. "There will always be room for you in Jabariland." He nods before heading into the palace.

*****
The silence on the Quinjet is deafening; none of you can meet each other's eye. Finally Rhodey breaks the silence. "I've spoken to Pepper, still no sign of Tony."

"Just got a message through the system," Nat chimes in before looking sharply at you. "Looks like Fury and Hill are gone too."

They all start talking amongst themselves, but you can't be part of this conversation. The pain is still too raw. You hadn't seen these people, or spoken to most of them for almost two years, but the guilt and the pain doesn't stop. It was never going to stop.

You want to scream. You want to shout. And cry, hell do you want to cry. But nothing can come out. You're numb. Turning your head, you lean it against the window; not even taking in the view, let alone the sounds around you.

"Sasha," A small shake of your shoulder brings you back; surprisingly you had fallen asleep but to you it again had felt like nothing. Your eyes meet Steve's. "We're back."

The compound looks exactly like it did the last time you were here; except this time you weren't a prisoner. While everyone goes off to do...something, you're left standing alone in the hallway, trying to figure out what to do.

Eventually your legs carry you to your former room; again it was the same. The only thing that had changed was you. Without your meaning to you then meander to the room next door. Sam's room.

Even after everything Tony hadn't moved anything from it. Sam's room looked as though he had just left it minutes ago, not two years. What you wouldn't give for that famous Sam Wilson smirk right now? Or a hug, maybe that would make you feel anything other than pain.

A small tap at the door grabs your attention; Nat on the other side with a small bundle of clothes. "Tony kept everything." She smirks before placing them in your hands. "I've got some food going if you want to get changed and join us."

You want to say thank you, no thanks, I'm fine. But you simply nod. Feeling somewhat confused at why you're not in your own room you brush past her and into yours. As you start to strip you feel the dirt covering your clothes, or was that ash? Was that the last remaining part of Bucky you had?