She was sweet he was mean. She always smiled while he was always serious. She didn't realize it but he knew she was the love of his life.
Delilah Morecelli 17 year old is always smiling. She treated everyone with kindness and never once stopped hel...
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"How are you feeling Delilah?" I looked at my therapist for a while. That's a tricky question. How am I feeling?
"Do you want to hear the generic response or the truth." I couldn't look at her, the guilt was eating me alive. Would she look at me differently if I told her the truth?
"I feel like a horrible person, I know I should feel sad and horrible about what I did, but I don't and that's why I feel so guilty" I looked up at her and see she was already looking at me.
"Did you want to shoot him?" I shook my head "No I didn't" I didn't have a choice. "How did you feel before and after you shot him" remembering that night still shakes me up. "That night I was scared for my life and Katerina's. I Was terrified. And when that man got on top of me it reminded me of... it reminded me of him. I remembered feeling helpless back then and disgusted with myself for not being able to defend myself. When he began to touch me I felt so angry, I was tired of men deciding what to do with my body no matter how much I made it clear they weren't welcome. I couldn't let myself be weak against so I shot him. Twice."
I looked at her to see her writing down on her notebook. "And after you shot him what did you feel." "I felt relieved I was able to defend myself. That I'm not helpless."
"Delilah it was self defense if you hadn't shot him you would have been back to square one. Anyone in your place would have done it." I nodded my head in agreement. Truth is killing him filled me with deep satisfaction, to see his eyes bright with excitement dim out.
Knowing I was able to get out this time. I shouldn't feel guilty because he would have probably done it to another girl, and if took me killing him fine by me.
"What do I do about the nightmares. I can't sleep" she prescribed me some medication and by the time I left her office I felt like a weight was lifted off me. I went into the parking garage and headed for Nikolai's car. "Everything go alright?" He looked at me with worry but it vanished once he saw I was truly okay.
"Delilah, I'm sorry" I looked at Nikolai. "Babe, I feel guilty because I enjoyed killing him. Not because I'm traumatized, okay maybe I am just a little but don't blame yourself for something you didn't have control over. I'm fine my love I promise."
He looked at me in shock and then yanked me over to him, making me sit on him. He hugged me tight. "Do you know the amount of fear I felt when I heard those gunshots go off. I thought I lost you, fuck I can't lose you Delilah." I hugged him back, running my hands through his hair.
"My heart is yours My sweet Delilah. Yours to keep"
When I reassured Nikolai that I was perfectly fine, except for the fact that I'm starving he finally decided to let go of me. I think he just secretly wants to be as close to me as possible.
When I got home I immediately went to shower scrubbing my body to the point my skin was red. Sometimes I feel like I still have blood on me. When I'm out I change and lay down in bed and pick up a book.
I was cuddling with nova when Cynthia barges into my room with aleksandr. "Um hello how did you guys get inside?" I sit up looking at them. "Oh your brothers gave us a key, and we sent a text." I grab my phone and see two texts, sometimes I wonder why I have a phone.
"Delilah we're going ice skating what are you doing, get up." Cynthia says pulling me up while aleksandr lays in my bed petting nova. What the heck. Cynthia goes into my closet and picks a cute outfit.
I was staring off into the distance not knowing if I really wanted to go out. "I love you" I look at cynthia to see her already staring at me. "Just wanted to reminds you in case you forgot." Cynthia isn't one to say I love you without meaning them, which makes it all more special.
"Just so you know I can see right through you. It felt good didn't it." My eyes widened I looked at Cynthia to see her tilt her head with a smile. "I don't know what your talking about." I change quickly with her in the closet looking at my dresses.
I exit the closet and sit in my vanity looking at Alek taking pictures with nova. "Hey if it makes you feel better, I enjoy setting fire and exploding things."
"Can I borrow this dress." I look at her holding the red dress. "Keep it I never wore it." She smiles and sits on the bed.
"Yea and I enjoy torturing people" I look at cynthia and aleksandr who are serious. "You guys are a match made in hell. You guys creep me out sometimes." We all burst out laughing. And when I finished getting ready we all headed out to Aleksandr car.
When we arrived to the skating rink. Cynthia clings onto me. I never told them I did ice skating until sophomore year. I don't know why I quit I loved skating.
"Bad idea, I don't like this." She says on wobbly feet right when I was going to help her a little boy shoves her. "Get out the way!" We both end up falling as she pulled me with her.
We groaned and looked at the kid skating away and I bursted out laughing. "Do you need me to get you one of those walking strollers." She glared at me and got up. "I hate you sometimes."
We spent the night skating well more like cynthia falling and cursing at everybody. When we were in the car driving back home Cynthia Knocked out on my shoulder. "You know she trust you with her life" I looked at Aleksandr.
Without Cynthia I wouldn't be who I am today. She helped me in more ways than she realizes. She's more than my best friend. She's my sister.
"Yea I know, she's killed for me. Don't think I don't know about her blowing up that house."
When I got home I said my goodbyes and immediately knocked out.
