Emotional Suicide || [EDITING]

Chapter 29

I feel so safe with him but i also feel scared . What if i do let him into ny life and he does what Jax did .
I know its wrong to say all the boys the same but -
You know what everyone deserves to be given a chance .

"Miranda May dont fucking scare me   like this are you okay ?" He whispers in my ear . 

" Im not okay but ill be alright T ," i laugh while sniffling

"Shordy , i used to get panick attacks when i would think about my brother i know somethings causing this ," he says softly

"Wait why your brother ?" I ask curiously. 

"Shaw this isnt about me , atleast just tell me your okay ," he sighs

"I told you already im okay T , please dont worry about me ," i smile .

"How do you expect me not to worry    shaw , i just feel some typa way about you , i dont know what that way is but it definetly isnt this friends shit you have us on ,"

"I know he hurt you May , i witnessed him do it to you , i know how he treated you wasn't right , i would never neglect you the way he did , "

"Fuck comparison , i just want you to give us a chance , i know this fame thing may get in the way , i know its new to you , but its new to me , so its new to we . We can navigate through it together ," i interupt him

"Tjay I - ," he interupts me just like i did him .

"Shordy hear me out here , lemme take you out today and then you can say whatever it is you wanna say , please ," he pouts .

"Who told you i was finna say no to whatever your saying ," i laugh .

"I want you to be my girl , im not finna ask you that shit in my car , girls like special shit dont they ," he smiles tucking my curly hair behind my ear .
Fuck straightening it anymore , im finna embrace this part of me , the part thats more like Tjay . The part that makes me feel like the real me .

" fine ill go out with you today , but you know you had already told me we're going out ," i laughed

"You good to go to the hotel or you still wanna take a break ? "  he asks

"I think im good to go babe ," i say the last part more to myself .

"You really goin' ham on the nicknames today aren't you shaw ?" He laughs putting the car in drive and continuing down the road to the hotel .

"Says the guy who was talking about being my man a breath ago ," he scoffs playfully and continues driving .

We get to the hotel and im shocked by how expensive it looks . It looks like Tjay really went all out . 
People who look like they work at the hotel take our bags and Tjay tells then to take them to our room .

I go to the reception with Tjay so we can check in .

"Hi , can i have my room number under the name Merrit ?" Tjay said to the receptionist .

"That will be the penthouse suite on the top floor Mr and Mrs Merrit , " she said making me and Tjay both laugh at the name .

"You ready to go up Mrs Merrit ? "  he laughs intertwining our fingers .  I just smile at him and say nothing . Im so smitten when im around this boy that i cant even talk anymore .

We take the elevator up to the top floor and let me just say this is the most expensive place ive been to all my life .

My parents dont do nice stuff for me . Ever . He opens the door using our key card and im not surprised that our bags are already there .

We close the door behind us and sit on the bed admiring the room .
"You know we dont have to share a room if you - ," he interupts me pecking my lips and resting his forehead on mine . Our first fucking kiss .

"I got this room for the both of us shaw ,  plus i like to cuddle ," he laughed getting up from the bed .

"So what do you have planned for the day ? "

"That parts a surprise shordy ," he smiles .

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A/n

Heyy guys . Dont have much to say .
But vote and comment it wont kill yall lol .

Byeeee potatoes 🥔😋